Lisa lampanelli to Replace Anne Curry 0n Today Show

 NBC Rules

"And my co -host will be Big Balls Jimmy!"

"We are thrilled that NBC has decided to put some real balls into Network TV -and my first week's guests will all be black guys whose dicks i have made happy!"

we are gonna fuck America every morning

She continued:"I have had more black cock in me than the urinals at the Apollo Theatre"

Lisa Is a Fat fucking Whore

Asked about Anne Curry she said; "Nice chick too bad she was born without a pussy."

Pope Tells Africans Not To Fuck

fuck the Pope

Boys are better

"Hey you dysfunctional folks out there on the Dark Continent - i know your'e having trouble not chopping up everyone in sight -and you make a dollar a day - and your'e hot and dirty - and you have no toilet paper or TV or radio or socks -or even drugs -and there are flies eating up your eyeballs:
"But i - Your Popa - don't have a cock and i am very happy -so donta you worry about getting laid -- i hear it's very messy!"

'If you absolutely have to stick your biga blacka dicka in something -find a young boy -lika my priests."
That Pope is quite a guy!

But the Church is tone deaf - here's the latest statement from The Black Bishops (who would fuck any altar boy that's not armed even if he has advanced stage leprosy)
"The bishops did not veer from Vatican policy opposing the use of condoms to prevent the spread of H.I.V. and AIDS. “The problem cannot be overcome by the distribution of prophylactics,” they wrote. Instead, they urged abstinence among the unmarried and fidelity among the married. “Such a course of action not only offers the best protection against the spread of this disease but is also in harmony with Christian morality,” they wrote."

These guys are from another planet!