Hollywood Septic Tank Cleaner Scores Big With Star Shit

 Hollywood Septic Tank Cleaner Scores Big With Star Shit 

Wiilliam Bigturd, an American Indian septic tank cleaner in Hollywood announced at a press conference held by Creative Artists Agency today at the Polo Lounge in Beverly Hills: "Yep -- it's true! - iv'e been cleaning out the septic tanks of the Stars for many moons and i have saved and catalogued their "Star Shit" with it's DNA -- along with the shit my ancestors have saved -- we have been in the septic business since the early days of Hollywood"-- He continued; 

"My Grandfather,Johnny Bigdump, always kept a bowl of Tonto's shit in the living room. (Lone Ranger's sidekick for younger readers)" Moishe Pipick,head of liscencing for CAA said; "-- How much will people pay for an original John Wayne dump or a freshly minted Scarlett Johannson,or for a beauty from say  Brad Pitt? -The skys the limit!" The Hollywood Reporter blared "There's Gold In Them Thar Hills"- Star Shit gold in the Hollywood Hills that is - and it reported that septic tank wars have erupted in Memphis as  A Shit Gold Rush has created a frenzy to obtain the Holy Grail of turds -- a blast from the King himself. CAA announced yesterday; "Christy's elite auction house will be the exclusive seller of the Star Shit " and Arnold Grimey, head auctioneer at Christy's said today ; "ANd an authenticated Star Shit NFT could sell for more than a Picasso -- a penultimate statement about American culture!" 

AND the Bandit has it on good authority that entrepreneurial gynecologists in LA may have been stockpiling "Star Sperm" -- what is next? -- stay tuned! (copyright lawyers should have a field day as well as firms who will be rushing to install secure shit facilities).

Ignorance IS Bliss - Trumpism

 Ignorance IS Bliss

This phrase was coined by the English poet and literary scholar Thomas Gray (1716-1771) in An Ode on a Distant Prospect of Eton College (London: printed for R. Dodsley and sold by M. Cooper, 1747):

 

"To each his suff'rings: all are men,

         Condemn'd alike to groan,

The tender for another's pain;

         Th' unfeeling for his own.

Yet ah! why should they know their fate?

Since sorrow never comes too late,

         And happiness too swiftly flies.

Thought would destroy their paradise.

No more; where ignorance is bliss,

    'Tis folly to be wise."

 

America’s Red States mostly populated by low information individuals with majorities of the non-college educated represent the inherent value in this mind numbing worldview:

 

“Thought would destroy their paradise.

No more; where ignorance is bliss,

    'Tis folly to be wise.”

 

Meanwhile America’s Blue State populations with their preponderance of educated progressive liberals and humanists, awash daily in  harsh true facts - Those realities of America’s intolerance - discrimination - inequalities and inequities; suffer  daily existential anxt  and 

Blisslessness.

 

Along with the ubiquitous tribal scorn of their blissful fellow Americans! 

 

 For us godless queer libtards who threaten that soothing balm of freedom from what they don’t know or understand -The comfort of faith in their absurdities - The reinforced bonding with their neighborly cults and tribes - The relief from struggle with the complexities of nuanced existence.

 

Anti-Science and ahistorical  - Slumbering in Plato’s Cave until aroused to action by the whining of those libtards who threaten their god blessed White America and their blissful certainty.

 

AND whose pathetic condescending ingenuous and arrogant attempts to help them; only reinforce their contempt for us weak kneed  America haters and neo-liberals with our godless programs and policies designed to create a socialist paradise out of this great beautiful white land.

Well -How  stupid do we progressives have to be - To keep trying to help these Red State Trogs from turning into the inevitable state of cultural and economic irrelevance awaiting them 

From their self-inflicted wounds?

 

 Let them peacefully  celebrate their blissful tribal nativism - AND their delusional white supremacy. Leave them unimpeded by our progressive protestations to wallow in their ignorance and  lousy leftover low tech jobs  -  Surrounded by their hopeless under educated children until they have to come begging for the guaranteed incomes we might then provide -Essential to sustain their basic needs.

 

Meanwhile we’ll be celebrating OUR new well deserved  BLISS! 

 

Free from giving a shit about y’all!