In America It's Ok To Burn Bibles AND The Flag And Your Bra

We should build a fifty foot stack of Old and New Testaments AND include lots of those Goofy Mormon texts too - Throw in copies of The Dao The Bahgada-Gita -Ancient Buddhist texts --The Talmud and even a ton of Great Western literature AND top it off with a few hundred American Flags AND Throw in some Bra's just for fun:

Pour gasoline on generously -AND light it up at night in front of The White House and dance around it in a great big celebration of American FREEDOM and ENLIGHTENMENT:

A demonstration to the world's wackos (and our homegrown Fundamentalists) THAT;

These are just THINGS - The principles they embody become meaningful only through behavior.

No beheadings No stoning --No calls for indiscriminate armed slaughter -- No psychopathic rhetoric or the maniacal drumbeats of Priests and Prophets (except the Beck -Palin Limbaugh - Baynor crowd in America of course)

Because -They are ONLY fucking THINGS AND WE know the difference between an act of non violent symbolism - AND (In Gainsville,Fla.) an act performed by a handful of morons who don't represent American intent (Led by a loony Pastor) --AND

If such an act becomes an excuse to rally ignorant socio-pathic Muslims to slaughter and maim and wage war????

THEN -as reprehensible and misguided as that Florida Pastor's inclinations are -- He does make a point!

We cannot be held hostage to Muslim Fundamentalism!

Just imagine if you had a violent and retarded teenager who threatened to chop you up or stone you to death if you listened to music? - If you didn't wear a body cloak? -If you Criticized a Book? - If you were gay ? --If you had an extramarital affair? -If you watched a sexy movie? -If you wore makeup? If you masturbated? The list is endless!

Would you say; "Oh sorry Johnny - that seems a tad unreasonable but ok I really don't want to piss you off"

Hey - if he's bigger and stronger than you - you might want to wait till you're out of the house and seek protection if you can --BUT:

When you are the strongest nation in the history of Civilization -and being existentially threatened by a gang of Bronze age thugs and their scko Religious leaders?

You throw them out a fucking window!

In America It's Ok To Burn Bibles AND The Flag

We should build a fifty foot stack of Old and New Testaments AND include lots of those Moronic Mormon texts too - Throw in copies of The Dao The Bahgadfa-Gita and even a ton of Great Western literature AND top it off with a few hundred American Flags AND:

Pour gasoline on generously -AND light it up at night in front of The White House and dance around it in a great big celebration of American FREEDOM and ENLIGHTENMENT:

A demonstration to the world's wackos (and our homegrown Fundamentalists) THAT;

These are just BOOKS - The principles they embody become meaningful only through behavior.

No beheadings no stoning --No calls for indiscriminate armed slaughter -- No psychopathic rhetoric or the maniacal drumbeats of Priests and Prophets (except the Beck -Palin Limbaugh - Baynor crowd in America of course)

Because -They are ONLY fucking books AND WE know the difference between an act of non violent symbolism and say - an act performed by a handful of morons who don't represent American intent --AND

An act which becomes an excuse to slaughter and maim and wage war by millions of psycho Muslims.

Which is why -as reprehensible and misguided as that Florida Pastor's inclinations are -- He does make a point!

3 Blind Mice - Faith Hope and Charity

St. Paul’s three abiding guides in the Bible: faith, hope and charity. Mr. Beck told viewers that he walked dazed from the studio, gripped by a new theme. -- His crisis was ending. “I see the landing strip,” he declared. He would apply organizing techniques from the civil rights movement. On the 47th anniversary of Dr. King’s “I Have a Dream” speech, he would bestow citizenship medals for faith, hope and charity.

So if the Republican's/ TheTea Party/ Religioso et. al. - with their Anti intellectual -Anti progressive, master plan -- Based on FAITH and HOPE and CHARITY appeals to you -then i have a better plan for ya.

Bend over and stick your head up your ass where it rightfully belongs -Buried in a dark and smelly hole - Where the light of intelligently designed plans -formulated by disciplined and experienced problem solvers - cannot - and will NEVER shine!

And may god bless you -AND keep you -right there -On Glen Beck's landing strip - From whence you will NEVER take off.

Nagging Israeli Wives Will Kill Palestinian Peace Talks

"Abe -you good for nothing poor excuse for a Jewish husband!" - "You moved me and the kids out here in the middle of the desert -surrounded by angry goyim - in this poor excuse for a home - and you promised things would get better"



" Becky! But Becky! - Abe cried" -- "The land is cheap -we'll make a killing! -The goyim are morons! - For what do they need land? - It'll be ok. - You can have a nice garden and i'll build a swingset for the kinder"



"I told you then Abe -i can't live with you and four kids in a tiny place with one small bedroom and one bathroom -and no diniing area -and no laundry room" - "But - i listened to your pleading like a real schmuck."



" You promised - Becky Becky my darling - soon we'll expand - we'll make a killing! - I'll grow some nice lemons in the yard - and some cabbage for you to stuff - and the air is so clean"



"And Beckela -right over there where that bush is - that is where king David took a nice crap before he killed that giant goyim Goliath!"



"Beckela -my angel -this is the ancient homeland of the Jewish Prophets"



"Well now Abe! - I put up with this place for five years - with the goyim screaming and yelling -and the rotton plumbing - and the sandstorms and the rockets - and:



" Now i'm telling you - You build an addition on this house and put in a swimming poool - Or - me and the kids are going back to my parents in Tel Aviv -and i'm getting my cousin - the lawyer - Moishe Pipick to drain you dry with alimony and child support"



'You can stay out here with the goyim and the prophets - and you can shtupp the sheep!"



So -now you know why the settlement issue will NOT be solved any time soon - AND - why the Palestinians -whose wives only speak when spoken to - cannot grasp the depth of this problem.

Fox TV Announces "Dress The Dwarfs"

Mike (a Dwarf himself)Harnell -ex Prexy of Fox Reality TV -and who is trying to redeem his career with a slew of hit shows ("Dancing With Disabilities" and "Studsy The Queer Bull" for Gay children, among others) -announced from his office in the Venice Beach Bar and Grill today:

"So we have all these hit fashion shows and fashion for Fatso women and all -BUT absolutely nothin focusing on Dressing Dwarfs?"

He continued: "Look at my suit -you think it was easy to make a suit like this? -I have two Dwarf tailors and they can -and will - design the asses off any of those fag designers on those other shows! _Just you wait and see!"

Digibandit Hollywood reporter Elise Mandelbaum asked : "Do you really think folks want to see DWARF fashion Mike? -And speaking of asses -how about showin us the new version of your "Hot Booty Dance"

"Ha ha Elise you hot Jewish Princess - if you want to see my "Hot Booty Dance" join the 15 million folks who have watched me on You Tube smack in the act of getting fired from Fox"

"AND - of course folks want to see my Dwarf Fashion show -Because they will get to see Dwarf Tits!"

He concluded: "And no fucking Midgets allowed!"

From Beck's Mouth To God's Ears

“There’s nothing we can do that will solve the problems that we have and keep the peace unless we solve it through God,” he told “Fox News Sunday.”

He also expressed regret for having asserted last year that Mr. Obama was a racist with a “deep-seated hatred for white people,” a comment that many critics felt undercut Mr. Beck’s assertion of racial tolerance.

“It was poorly said — I have a big fat mouth sometimes,” Mr. Beck said.

Glen Beck has NO concrete ideas -A complete abscence of intellect and wisdom - He is a mean spirited ideologue -A Mormon rabble rouser in the mold of Joseph Smith the Charlatan founder of The Mormons AND:



Along with the ignorant rabble of Bible belters and fellow ideologues like Sarah Palin they have demonstrated to all sensible American's -AND the World - The stark difference between the voices of compassion and reason and thoughtfullness -and the fear and anger and lack of wisdom that inhabit a significant portion of humanity.

Dreary expletives and an idiotic ideology fraught with populist generalities that inhibits rationale problem solving real progress and social justice is their Mantra..

Always been that way with that crowd -Always will

Do Muslim Suicide Bombers Go To Paradise?

Look --The Muslims in NYC have EVERY moral and legal right established since before the Magna Carta to build their fucking Mosque at Ground Zero.

Build away! -Most Americans who are fired up over this are complete assholes -BUT -they are rightfully sick to their stomachs at seeing Muslims blow each other and American Soldiers to pieces because some ignorant and repressed Muslim religious leader says it's ok - And that they will be rewarded by Allah and sent directly to Paradise"

"Hi I'm Allah -meet Mohamma -Welcome and nice job -take a swim -get your dick sucked by a Virgin - let me show you around"

OK -Let's cut the crap -NOW is the time! -Let's heae a great crying out from World Muslim Religious leaders and all those Muslims who REALLY are our friends - That killing innocent civilians -for whatever motivation -is a Koranic No No -and you will be barred from Paradise forever for any such actions


OTHERWISE - pack your bags and get out of Dodge while the getting is good!

Unreasonable and unfair and undemocratic as many American's are behaving -and unfortunately motivated by morons like Palin and Lazio and Limbaugh et al -- They have a right to be confused and pissed off by the barbarism they see taking place in the Muslim world --SO --C'mon -show us the truth and magnitude of morality inherent in YOUR Bible -So that we are sure about it!

Be reasonable -it's not asking a lot to ask you Muslims to prevent your holy book from being used as a tool to endanger Civilization.

Hey -when the rednecks were enslaving and lynching black foklks in America they were spouting Scripture -BUT we had a war over that and 600 thousand Americans were killed in the process of beginning to set things right.

You folks gotta start the ball rolling about stopping the justification for suicide bombing coming out of The Koran!

THATS the Focus for all the nice Muslims we keep hearing about --AND NOW!

Jesus Spotted at "Center of the World" Festival

Lurine Swarthout - An avid congregant of The "Shepherd of the Mountains Lutheran Church" was attending the annual "Center of the World"Festival in nearbye Pine Mountain Village "when a bright light burst from the heavens and there was Jesus staring down and crying"

At least a dozen other spectators claim to have seen the same vision -and many more said they heard celestial bells and one man said he felt a tingling in his groin.

Sunday is the final day of the Festival and word is spreading quickly that Jesus is in attendance.

The owners of the Pine Mountain Club grocery store -local bar and gas station have all claimed to have clearly seen the Saviour walking around the festival grounds -and the Gas Station proprietor is adament about having spotted the Virgin Mary's face on one of his gas pumps.

WELL - SOMETHING is up - up there in Pine Mountain Club Village -- and we'll have more on this tomorrow.

In the meantime if you're planning on checking out the action you better allow at least twelve hours to drive from Los Angeles up to Pine Mountain Club as Pilgrimages are already being organized.

One other thing -Jesus being spotted crying in a location directly adjacent to The San Andreus fault Line -May not be the best of Omens?

Or maybe it was the drumming?

"Blackberry Brain Disease" Afflicting Millions

The Universal Cultural Research Institute in Berne, Switzerland announced the results of a five year study of over ten thousand seemingly successful and normal - high usage Blackberry owners.

"The results were startling and extremely alarming" -- said Dr. Moishe Pipick -Head of neuroscientific data analysis for the institute.

He stated; "I won't bore you with the elaborate stem cortex graph analysis data -or the comprehensive back-up documentation regarding behavioral pathology and emotional deconstruction - along with the acute alteration of logic and emotional circuitry in the cerebral cortex -caused by this device in the hands of high user Alpha males."


Dr. Pipick continued; "But i will say that what we call "Assumptive Logic Pathology" -Which is a mental disorder common to 87% of those in our study - where they are making judgements based on a minimal percentage of the data they are receiving (that info contained in the first paragraph of the Blackberry communiques) -

"BUT - their brains -which have evolved a logical paradigm for more detailed and semi-comprehensive information analysis over millions of years -is being frustrated and -how shall i say it in non technical terms? --In German, Freud called it --Ungershtupped mitten horst manureschweigen infoschlacken"

He concluded; "In other words -stuffed and confused - or overloaded with horsehit information!"

"Can you give us an example of "Assumptive Logical Pathology " Dr. Pipick?" - Asked digibandit Science Reporter -Elise Mandelbaum.

"YES! -here's a typical one - A Television program developer received an urgent email from his aged Mother's heart specialist in which the first words on the Blackberry were "Have idea which you will find important and crucial"

Dr. Pipick went on; "The busy emotionally overloaded program executive quickly sent back a message after getting what he thought was the info gist of the communique "Sorry Doc -too busy to deal with elevator concepts (quicky creative concepts) from you"

"WELL -What the program executive failed to read was the part of the message which said; " Your Mom in coma! -Severe heart attack ! -Need immediate approvalfor radical new stent implantation!"

Dr Pipick concluded; "AND this will Kill ya Elise! -The Dr's next email back to the TV Development big shot said -- in the first three words of a message explaining the DEATH of our programmer's mother: "Mom is gone..... "

"AND the guy sends the Dr. back a quicky Blackberry shot -"Hey Doc! -There are three shows on the air right now about Mothers yaddadada -please give me a break here -- OH! -And how's my mother doing?"

GW Was Right About "Uteroil" C'mon Obama!

Two years ago GW had the answer to the Fossil Fuel/Climate Change crisis - as i reported to the fury of the Moronic Religious Rednecks:

SATURDAY, JANUARY 19, 2008
Major Breakthrough In Fossil Fuel Replacement -- Uteroil

The International Energy Association announced today that working with a team of physicists from Cal Tech and MIT -- they have discovered how to produce a highly carbon friendly and super powerful replacement for fossil fuels.

"Our dependence on foreign oil will be eliminated - the answer to the "greenhouse problem" has been discovered, and the absolute dominance of the world wide energy market by the United States is now imminent" - said Moishe Pipick, lead scientist on "Project Uteroil."

He explained,"For ten years now we have been experimenting with discarded fetus' and placental afterbirth matter from over thirty million abortions in the USA."

"We now have conclusive scientific evidence that if the abortion rate continues - the stem cellular energy from this powerful fetal matter will be sufficient to replace our entire fossil fuel based energy grid -and will provide enough "Uteroil" to maintain a pump price of under two dollars a gallon for the foreseeable future,"said Dr. Pipick.

He went on; "And this totally clean source of powerful energy is abundant all over the globe - we can import aborted fetus' from around the world, and applying our technology, we can dominate and control the world-wide energy market!"

President Bush said today; "The Arabs and Russia and Africans better figure out some new way to pay for screwing their people and paying for weapons -heh heh"

When asked about the moral implications of using aborted fetus' for energy, he replied " Heck - abortions are legal -and if we really care about the rights of the unborn - we oughta give em a green earth to grow up in."

"But, said the President - i don't wanta see folks creatin a new market by creatin and sellin dead babies for "Uteroil" - Uh Uh! - But them Muslims could probably make a little extra cash and cut way down on their production of future suicide bombers by sending us lots of aborted Mulims to turn into clean energy."

As KingFaisal of Saudi Arabia said twenty years ago : "Don't be greedy my Arab brothers - the stone age didn't end because they ran out of stones."

Too late!

My Answer To The Unemployment Crisis

We’re not heading toward the danger zone. We’re there. The U.S. will not remain a stable society if this great employment crisis is not addressed head-on — and soon. You cannot allow joblessness on this scale to fester. It’s wrong, and the blowback will be as destructive and intolerable as it is inevitable -Bob Herbert NY Times


SO -it's simple and necessary -EVERY profitable US corporation AND all Americans with savings and assets totalling above one million dollars :

HAS to hire a required number of the unemployed -Based on an equitable formula --a percentage of their assets -to be determined by Congress..

The Corporations are rolling in dough and loving this new -high productivity -squeeze the shit out of the employees paradigm!

And the rich can afford to hire some folks! --It won't even put a dent in their lifestyles --hire some tutors and maybe even some spiritual mentors --Lordy knows the kids AND the parents need emotional assistance in this fucked up society.

Or you can sit idly by and hire security guards later.

The revolucion may be coming?

Fox TV Announces - "Save A Tree -Eat A Beaver"

Mike Schlocknell Fox Reality Tv President related a story his Maternal Russian Grandfather -Moishe Pipick used to tell them as kids:

"Now children this is a fable called "Save A Tree -Eat A Beaver" BUT
It's what adults call a metaphor - meaning an example of something else -and in this case the Beaver is an example of a kind of woman we call in Russian "Gevaltnish Pussy -or '"Killer Woman" -or "Killer Pussy -and it's about eating them before they destroy the trees - a metaphor for eating (or destroying) YOU - OR it's ok to just EAt them but don't get involved which is too advanced for you at five years old -but anyway -- "The Beaver was lying in the pond on her back and along comes...."

Schlocknell continued: "So - Hewlitt Packard's CEO is just the latest victim of the "Beaver Trap" Another high rolling power brokering -super successful Alpha Male -reduced to cowering in front of John Q Pulic - out there looking for blood and schadenfreude and a good ole Beaver Trapped - Gotcha! - tale of demise."

"AND - we're gonna give the folks out there in TV land a lot of red meat and blood and guts to soothe their insatiable appetite for stories about Celebrities and Politicians -and Business Moguls torn apart by the endless hordes of Hot Beavers out there ready to tear the balls off any Powerful Buck who shows a sign of weakness."


"Mark V Hurd getting torn apart by Jodie Fisher is just the latest example of a long list of "Prime Bulls" to be denutted by a savage Beaver -And At Fox TV -THEY won't just be eaten and forgotten"


"Save a tree -EAT a Beaver!" Summer of 2011

Fox TV Announces - "Save A Tree -Eat A Beaver"

Mike Schlocknell Fox Reality Tv President related a story his Maternal Russian Grandfather -Moishe Pipick used to tell them as kids:

"Now children this is a fable called "Save A Tree -Eat A Beaver" BUT
It's what adults call a metaphor - meaning an example of something else -and in this case the Beaver is an example of a kind of woman we call in Russian "Gevaltnish Pussy -or '"Killer Woman" -or "Killer Pussy -and it's about eating them before they destroy the trees - a metaphor for eating (or destroying) YOU - OR it's ok to just EAt them but don't get involved which is too advanced for you at five years old -but anyway -- "The Beaver was lying in the pond on her back and along comes...."

Schlocknell continued: "So - Hewlitt Packard's CEO is just the latest victim of the "Beaver Trap" Another high rolling power brokering -super successful Alpha Male -reduced to cowering in front of John Q Pulic - out there looking for blood and schadenfreude and a good ole Beaver Trapped - Gotcha! - tale of demise."

"AND - we're gonna give the folks out there in TV land a lot of red meat and blood and guts to soothe their insatiable appetite for stories about Celebrities and Politicians -and Business Moguls torn apart by the endless hordes of Hot Beavers out there ready to tear the balls off any Powerful Buck who shows a sign of weakness."


"Mark V Hurd getting torn apart by Jodie Fisher is just the latest example of a long list of "Prime Bulls" to be denutted by a savage Beaver -And At Fox TV -THEY won't just be eaten and forgotten"


"Save a tree -EAT a Beaver!" Summer of 2011

Dog Hating Muslims Should Be Deported

First of all any group that believes that dogs are ritually unclean -especially one known for it's lack of sanitation and personal hygiene -AND who live in a country with 83 million dog owners/lovers is asking for trouble.

AND -all the Muslims and their spiritual leaders have a responsibility to speak out against Islamo Fascism -and it would be nice to see at least ONE "March Against Muslim Fundamentalist Butchers" take place somewhere -anywhere -anytime now in America.

Hey you Muslims are dealing with folks who almost wiped out the Jews for a crime they believe some Jew commited 2000 years ago -and refused to let Catholics vote in the original thirteen colonies (except Maryland which was mostly Catholic). AND detained innocent Japanese citizens during WW2 in concentration camps just because they were short.

What the fuck do you think these maniacs are prepared to do to a bunch of folks who don't say boo when their brethren are trying to annihilate us Infidels 24/7.

And you Muslims don't eat BBQ pork and hate dogs and TV and video games and kinky sex - on top of all that other Koranic Violence shit.

Lotsa luck - and take a bath!


The woeful lack of protestation by American Muslims has rightfully led to the morons of The Religious right and the American rednecks to martial their hatred against them-here are some of the latest examples -published in The NY Times:


"In Murfreesboro, Tenn., Republican candidates have denounced plans for a large Muslim center proposed near a subdivision, and hundreds of protesters have turned out for a march and a county meeting.

In late June, in Temecula, Calif., members of a local Tea Party group took dogs and picket signs to Friday prayers at a mosque that is seeking to build a new worship center on a vacant lot nearby.

In Sheboygan, Wis., a few Christian ministers led a noisy fight against a Muslim group that sought permission to open a mosque in a former health food store bought by a Muslim doctor.

At one time, neighbors who did not want mosques in their backyards said their concerns were over traffic, parking and noise — the same reasons they might object to a church or a synagogue. But now the gloves are off.

In all of the recent conflicts, opponents have said their problem is Islam itself. They quote passages from the Koran and argue that even the most Americanized Muslim secretly wants to replace the Constitution with Islamic Shariah law."

Who Cares Whose In The Graves?

All this hullabaloo about mismarked graves at Arlington National Cemetery seems ridiculous to me.

I mean if i suddenly found out I've been praying over some rotting organic stuff that used to be the body of Moishe Feingold instead of Elise Mandelbaum -my mother -who gives a shit?

It's symbolic right? I mean it's not like Mom is down the lane screaming "No! No!! -I'm over here"

And even if she was conscious down there - i think SHE would think it's funny -and if she is stuck down there rotting away she could sure use a good laugh.

And speaking of laughs -imagine the Lee's are all praying away and paying condolences over private Eustus Clayton - a black man who fell at Gettysburg -instead of their great grandfather and esteemed Southern General -who is actually feeding worms one hundred yards away down the road?

Now that's laughs and irony all around.

They should just tear down all the gravestones -erect one big monument and plant Medical Marijuana - and raise money for deficit reduction.

AllThat fertilizer would guarantee a bountiful harvest.

Jesus and Paul Announce Malibu Wedding

At last the Homo icons of Christianity are at Peace -As a California Judge opened the door of marriage to allof God's children;

And -ALSO - ironically - to Jesus and St Paul -both well known homo's in their time on Earth -who have always said they would like to be wed together in Southern California.

So while the moron Mormons -along with all the other Neanderthals on the religious right -and the whole Rush(Oxycotin) Limbaugh and Fox News crowd cries about the end of the world at the hands of the progressives:

Jesus and Paul will be in a Honeymoon suite in Malibu -fucking each other in marital Ecstasy.

The big question is -who is Mohammad the greatest Moslem homo gonna hook up with?

Maybe Krishna?

9/11 Site Should House Moslem Cultural Shrine

This museum would provide ongoing insight into the great cultural divide between Arab Fundamentalists and us Infidels by celebrating Moslem achievements over the past millenium -including but not limited to:

Keeping the stone age alive and well - complete with the stoning of women to death for crimes that get women alimony in the West.

The enslavement and or subjegation of their entire female population.

The virtual eleimination of democracy as a political institution.

The universal abhorrence and rejection of all things artful and entertaining.

The almost complete absence of a manufacturing OR high tech based economy -resulting in:

The almost complete absence of a middle class -and a fascist corrupt - oil based Oligarchy

A rabid proclivity to use violence to kill one another over irrational religious disputes - AND all non Moslems on the whim of fanatick religious leaders and:

Developing the revolutionary Moslem innovation of Suicide Bombers.

The highest rate of illiteracy in the world (outside of Muslim Africa) which enhances their complete misunderstanding of their sacred Texts -which they memorize.

The resultant response after a tour of this Moslem Cultural Shrine will resonate powerfully - with young and old and people of all ages -and even Aliens from OUTER space - as they stand in the holy light of Ground Zero -and exclaim:

"Who the fuck are these maniacal morons?"

Oh and bye the way -how long do you think a Mosque will stand at ground zero before it gets blown to bits by some redneck who will get The medal Of Freedom from President Palin and become the recruiting poster child for Osama Bin Douche bag?

"Children Are Starving In America --Eat Your Spinach!"

Remeber when your Mom used to say that --only substituting China for America?

NOW now -Chinese Mom's are saying "Eat your spinach -children are starving in America"

And American Mom's now say "Eat your spinach kids are starving in America"

I guess the next step will be American's emigrating to places like China AND Brazil AND India for employment opportunities.

What irony! -American's will ultimately become illegal aliens in countries we used to consider third world.

AND -the American underclass will keep growing like it did in Mexico -AND eventually will become drug dealing maniacs competing for the drug demand in the NEW prosperous nations.

And president Tod Palin will be blaming the drug wars on the huge demand for them by India and China and Brazil.

But the guns will still be supplied in America -our last thriving industry.

Thought about Singapore? --Israel?

If You're A Miserable Fuck?

Don't have children -AND DON'T get a dog!

So i'm out in the park with Liza (the wonderdog) yesterday and there's an attractive thirty ish woman about fifty yards away pulling and yelling at her dog like a moron.

Liza sees this and says to me "Hey poppy that's fucked up - I'm gonna go see if i can help"

So as Liza gets about thirty feet from the moron bitch (the dog OWNER that is) -She starts screaming "Get your dog away from me!"

In the meantime her son comes a running "Mommy! Mommy! can i pet the nice doggy?" (Liza)

Of course the miserable fuck starts yelling at the kid; "No! No! -You get away from that dog! -and look you're all muddy!"

Liza says to me; "Hey Pops -Can i take a bite out of that miserable fuck's ass?"

"Nope" says I -"Lets just keep movin along -people are like dogs -some are just turned into miserable fucks"

So now we come across a father teaching his kid how to ride a bike and he's runnin along beside him and the bike is all wobbling and teetering along -- and the kid is just laughing away -and the father is laughing -and Liza runs over to help out -and now the kid is playing with her -and the father is joining right in -and he says what a nice dog she is "Su pero es muy linda y contento "

"Yep she's a fine old girl allright" i reply -and he asks me something in Spanish that seems to say "Can my son give your dog a cookie?"

"Si Si gracias" says i and the kid gives Liza a cookie and Liza asks if she can play with the kid -and they gambol over to the duck pond together.

Well -i finally say "hasta luego" to Luis and little Luis and his momma - who is grilling hot dogs and hamburgers (liza and i each had a hot dog with jalapeno peppers and we split a Dos Equis) while singing joyfully

So as i get to my car i see a Range Rover pulling out and the driver is guess who? -You got it! --The miserable fucking moron! -And i hear the kid crying and the dog barking -and her yelling:

"Next time your father can take you to the park -if he can spare time from his golf"

AND -that's kinda a metaphor for life -ain't it?

And about immigration

Remember When Jane Fonda said Cunt on TV?

Daddy! Daddy! What's a Cunt?
Asks my five year old daughter after hearing Jane Fonda's comment on the Today Show.

I respond, "Well dear it's the female version of prick."

She intelligently responded; "Oh - you mean like the way Mommy acts when you come home drunk"

Yes dear - "And how she acts when she doesn't get her own way ."

But daddy, "Wouldn't the correct English for Momma's behavior be cunty - because it's an adverb - i think Jane used it as a noun?"

"Wow - sending you to The latin School has really paid dividends and you are soo right"

I went on; "Ms. Fonda was using cunt as a noun and was referring to the female sex organ in that regard -she really should have said vagina."

"But daddy - why didn't she just say Pussy?"

Kid's today!

Polish STILL a Polish Joke -Amsterdam RULES

http://www.nytimes.com/2010/07/18/world/europe/18poland.html

The European Gay Pride Parade was met in Poland by trhe usual Polish redneck peasant thugs that have characterized the Polaks for a thousand years.

The same asshole thugs who cheered on the trains heading for Auschwitz.

Poland would make a perfect red state in the USA -maybe John Baynor should lead a conservative Republican delegation over there to combine resources in the fight against human progress

Big problem is when the Polaks find out Johnny Boy Baynor is a latent homo hisself -whose Little Kelbasi wiener has been known to keep Mitch McConnell on his toes.

Oh and Nancy and Harry should trip on over to Amsterdam and see what progressive REALLY means.(90% of Holland is bisexual or headed there)The European Gay Parade in Amsterdam was ten times bigger than the one in West Hollywood.

Think about it will ya?

Go Netherlands!

Does Bill Gates Have a Penis?

I was just wondering about that because you never hear about him foolin around and he is worth 20 billion plus dollars -and his wife Melissa is cute -but hey:

I mean here's a healthy powerful guy - and he's smart and funny and the world's richest man.

I mean "Melissa darling - i'm off to Paris to talk about the Foundation and i'll be back in five days"

So meanwhile his trusted assistant Moishe Pipick who Gates pays 3 million a week so he's sure of his loyalty -rounds up the hottest babes in Europe and they are waiting for him (masked of course) at his Plaza Athenee apartment -and well you get my drift.

I mean even if Melissa has been trained by Oral Sex Gurus and Yoga Pleasure Masters in Tibet -and they have discovered some super sex drug -- Just think of the action that Gates could acquire around the Globe?

Either he's getting more pussy than the legendary Attila The Hun to whom we all have some genetic link because he screwed almost every hottie on Earth back then --OR:

Bill Gates has no Penis -OR -It's gonna be some kinda memoir.

But with his dough he could probably have a kentucky Thoroughbred's dick sewed onto him - OR - even have Lebron James dick cloned and implanted.

If any of you know if Gates has a penis could you drop me a line?

It's driving me nuts!

Why Do They VOLUNTEER For Combat Duty?

Personally speaking -i would rather get married again than volunteer to fight say in Afghanistan or Bahgdad

How stupid do you have to be to be willing to get your nuts torn off -or worse -to save some stone age Muslims who hate us and could give a shit less about Democracy.

Like we don't have enough National Security issues facing us in our back yards.

Hey -i am thrilled that some men and women are willing to go get killed and will kill some of our enemies in the process -go ahead knock yourselves out.

Fact is most of them are just collecting a pay check doing exciting and respected work -and don't believe for a minute that they will ever get nicked.

AND -the vast majority will not get hurt and can come home and collect PTSS goodies (oh and did you not think that volunteering to go kill folks in a Muslim snakepit would be stressful?)

Being poor and married to some dysfunctional mate -with messed up kids (standard fare in the good ole USA today) - is more stressful than seeing a guy's head get blown off -and these poor Americans get nothing.

Oh and General Petraus and the Joint Chiefs have less chance of getting killed than the president of BP -and way more perks -so yeah we need them - BUT they aren't doing it for humanity (it's a great fucking job)

Maybe if we stop glorifying all this war service horseshit we can move forward about who really pays the biggest price for living in this downsliding -drug and alcohol depleted -academic failing - shopping mall -earth destroying -ignorant society -fueled by hypocritic -ignorant -power needy politicians and religious leaders and assorted other control freaks and banboozlers..

Pipick calls New Yorkers Pussies

A record-breaking heat wave tightened its grip on New York City on Tuesday, as triple-digit temperatures tested Consolidated Edison’s power supply, threatened the health of the elderly, and tried the patience and resilience of anyone who dared to venture outside.


With the temperature reaching 103 degrees in Central Park at 3:11 p.m., breaking the former record high of 101 degrees for the day set in 1999, Con Edison officials braced for the greatest demand for power they had ever had.

Dr.Moishe Pipick -head engineer for the city's electrical infrastructure called New Yorkers a bunch of pampered pussies today at a City Hall press conference:

"Today it is a mild 115 degrees in Bahgdad with 100% humidity -and virtyually zero air conditioning and minimal water for drinking and none for bathing"

He continued; "They have crappy plumbing and hardly any toilet paper -the woman have to wear heavy dark Burkas -and the men just sit around sweating and drinking tons of hot coffee"

He went on "At any moment anywhere some lunatic might blow up the whole neighborhood -and our Marines are walking around among this happy go lucky populace with 70 pounds of gear on them -sweating their balls off"

Dr. Pipick concluded: "So you spoiled fucking pampered New Yorkers should just go sit in the park and count your blessings"

Better World If British Won The American Revolution

Watching the bourgoise elitists and redneck morons and just plain stupid and greedy folks who comprise the Tea Party gang - it started me thinkin about the original Tea Party and the American Revolution -and i realized with great dismay that it would be a much better World if the British had won:

The common folk in the present UK are like Rocket Scientists compared to the commoners in the USA! They watch the BBC and are mostly non religious or Church of England which is like being a Buddhist compared to an American Christian.

-AND the Brits don't feel the need to own vaults filled with guns or to kill beautiful animals for a thrill. (even the British cops don't carry guns.


And - the Clergy are are MARRIED! - Reverends and Pastors don't sodomize children (they sodomize their wives like normal people do)
In The UK they have a House of Lords that knows the Common folk are assholes -and they are not ashamed to say so.

They also have a House of Commons where the people's representatives act like common assholes and are expected to by the asshole people -Who then get EXACTLY what they need and desrve,

They also have a Queen! - How fucking cool is that -AND as a result all the Gays are happy.

Oh -and without a whole lot of loony religious conservatives - you don't have debates about whether Darwin was an Atheist Jew lover and Creationism should be taught in schools -or whether a Zygote is a human being - and how God said in the bible that gays were Vermin (and all that other lovey dovey Scripture stuff)

AND AND AND -if The British HAD won the war with us - They would have been strong enough to maintain the British Empire:

Hence - NO First or Second World War (Germany wouldn't have said boo with a powerful British Empire standing in their way -AND no USSR and no cold war. (i estimate the savings in loss of life alone - at around two hundred million.)

AND best of all would have been (second only to the non emergence of those American Tea Bag morons):

When you called a customer service department for help with ANY product or service -Instead of getting "Hellooo Dees is Dakta in Mombay Ken i help Voooo?"

You would hear "Ello Mate -Gotta bit ov a problem have yeh? - well you just hold on Gov - an we will fix er right up!"

So -fuck George Washington and ALL The Founding fathers -

They screwed us Royally!

Fuck The Fourth!

God Wants Blood Sacrifices You Redneck Morons

Read this and pray that if there is a God he will wipe out the Deep South once and for all -and we can begin to settle homo sapiens there -and start over fresh.


After the singing of the opening hymn, “Ring the Bells of Heaven,” and the announcement that an engaged couple was now registered at Wal-Mart, the preacher read aloud a proclamation from Gov. Bob Riley that declared this to be a “day of prayer” — a day of entreaties to address the ominous threat to the way of life just outside the church’s white doors.

Whereas, and whereas, and whereas, the proclamation read. People of Alabama, please pray for your fellow citizens, for other states hurt by this disaster, for all those who are responding. And pray “that a solution that stops the oil leak is completed soon.”

In other words, dear God, thank you for your blessings and guidance. And one other thing, dear God:

Help.

The governor’s words hung a moment in the fan-turned air. Then the preacher, Shawn Major, summoned the men of the church to the front to “ask God to do something special.”

Two dozen men, many of them wearing short-sleeve shirts in summery colors, knelt and sat with heads bowed and eyes closed, while a half-mile down the street, other men — and women — underwent training in the use of a more secular form of hope, the laying of boom.

The wall between church and state came a-tumbling down on Sunday, as elected leaders from the five states on the Gulf of Mexico issued proclamations declaring it to be a day of prayer. Although days of prayer are not uncommon here — Governor Riley declared one asking for rain to relieve a drought a few years ago — these proclamations conveyed the sense that at this late date, salvation from the spill all but requires divine intervention.

Fox Announces --'Deadliest Snatch" Will Join Fall Reality Line-UP

It looks like Fox has outfoxed the competition with a show which has a huge built-in buzz generator with it's name association to one of TVs hottest reality shows .

Mike (darling) Darnell head of Fox TV said today; "Well every network is looking for their version of "Deadliest Catch" in the danger/action reality genre --so we looked for something that might be extremely dangerous but not locked to physical action"

"I mean -- there is no action like "Snatch Action" --but let's be real --it's what the Snatch does to your brain that makes it so dangerous!"

"I mean --if you fall off a boat fishing for giant crabs chances are you will get real cold --but from what i can see there's less danger of actual injury on those boats than befalls a NYC garbage man -- statistically speaking that is"

Mike continued vehemently; " But a "Deadly Snatch" can fuck up your whole life in an instant dude! -- i mean ,if you get hooked up with a major "Deadly Snatch" you will pray to God that you fall off a boat in one-hundred foot waves and drown!"

'I mean; " Most guys would rather fall asleep in the giant crab storage locker and be eaten alive -- than get eaten up inside by a really "Deadly Snatch!"

"I mean - I know guys who have been attacked by snatch so deadly that they ripped off their own nuts and dicks with a pliers."

He continued; "Trust me i know --there is snatch that is so deadly out here in Los Angeles that you will pray that a giant crab rips your nuts off and you bleed to death slowly -- alone on the beach in Venice -- rather than get consumed by it!"

"And -- we are going to show the most "Deadliest Snatch" we can find on this show and all the vicious action and trauma that goes with it -- and it's not gonna be pretty - just pretty damn deadly"

Stay tuned -- and hide the kids and old folks! --and if we can save just one viewer from a "Deadly Snatch" attack -- i can die in peace"

But when Mike --when already?

BP Stations Selling Polluted Gulf Oil

Herman Gottlieb had just filled up at the local BP station in Aliquippa ,Ohio when his car started to sputter and stalled.

He said:"I got out and noticed there were feathers coming out of my exhaust pipe -AND -when i stuck my fingers up there i found three dead shrimp"

He comtinued: "And then it dawned on me -Those Mother Fucking British assholes are refining that gulf oil and are now selling us gas from the Gulf oil spill!"

Tony Heyward CEO of BP said: "I will look into that as soon as i finish my colon cleansing regimen this evening -BUT - in any case we have to get a handle on the situation"

He concluded: "Even if the recycled oil can be refined into gas -I doubt if the dead Marine life components will be combustion friendly"

BP Stations Selling Polluted Gulf Oil

Herman Gottlieb had just filled up at the local BP station in Aliquippa ,Ohio when his car started to sputter and stalled.

He said:"I got out and noticed there were feathers coming out of my exhaust pipe -AND -when i stuck my fingers up there i found three dead shrimp"

He comtinued: "And then it dawned on me -Those Mother Fucking British assholes are refining that gulf oil and are now selling us gas from the Gulf oil spill!"

Tony Heyward CEO of BP said: "I will look into that as soon as i finish my colon cleansing regimen this evening -BUT - in any case we have to get a handle on the situation"

He concluded: "Even if the recycled oil can be refined into gas -I doubt if the dead Marine life components will be combustion friendly"

Fox Tv Announces “Ten Drunken Dwarfs Farting”

“I can’t take credit for this hot new addition to our summer reality line-up” said Fox TV pres. Mike Schlocknell.

“This sure fire hit is the brain child of our very own Rupert Murdoch” he said at a press conference in LA today “You know – “Rup has always maintained that if you did a whole show with nothing but Dwarfs sittin around drinking and getting loaded –and farting” “You’ll have a hit TV show Schlocknell!”

“So – we did some focus groups and sure enough Rup was absolutely right – folks were peeing in their pants –and we should have trusted Rup’s instincts from the get go –because if anyone has a feel for this shit –it’s Rup!”

“Isn’t the preferred term these days Little People - won’t they and the audience be offended by the word “Dwarfs?” asked digibandit Hollywood bureau chief –Elise Mandelbaum.

“Nope!” said Schlocknell - “ Rupe was very clear about that and he told me; “Mike – we don’t want ANY Little Folks! - Make sure you use ONLY dwarfs!”

“Are they gonna have a focus to their drunken fart laden commentary?” asked Mandelbaum.

“Oh yeah!” answered Schlocknell – the theme for the first thirteen shows is “ Obama Is Acting Like A? ” – like “President Obama is Acting Like a Baby” - Or he’s acting like a Spoiled Black Kid - Or He’s Acting Like a Muslim” -You get the idea Elise dontcha? -All that crybaby flap he voiced about Fox news!”

“Yeah –that Ruppert Murdoch sure is a creative character –he’s even more creative than you are Mike!”

“Well Elise” – he replied -“The Jews don’t have ALL the creativity around here” (off microphone -“But you sure have got great tits!”)

First Father's Day Began With A Blow Stick

Historians have recorded that there was a tradition to celebrate Father's Day even thousands of years ago. Their study say that 4,000 years ago in Babylon a son called Elmesu carved a father's day message on a clay card. In his message Elmesu wished his father a long and healthy life. There is no knowledge as to what happened to this father son duo but it is believed that several countries retained the custom of celebrating Father's Day.

Well - if you believe that i have a nice cabin in Kyrgestan i can sell you cheap.

About 60 thousand years ago after eons of men shtupping anything that moved and then moving on -like:

"So what you have a little one -what's that got to do with MY shtupping -and anyway -how does shtupping result in that little one? Go prove it (ancestor to first Jewish lawyer?)"

See -the cause and effect of shtupping resulting in a child -let alone YOUR child - was not figured out yet.

Well one day this cave woman Mildred tries something original and sneaks into the cave where Oorgy her main shtupper was sleeping and she gives him a present that the Tribal Witch and Healer - Esther Pipick - told her about:

A blow stick! - Which no one had dared tried before except Odin who blew stick the wrong guy and wound up with his skull bashed in -anyway -back to Mildred and Oorgy and Esther Pipick the Witch.

See -Esther had first discovered the blow stick when one night she was blowing on a stick with meat on it to cool it off -and being a witch she came up with the concept for the First blow JOB when Oorgy - sitting across from her at the fire ring - reacted to her blowing on the stick by having HIS weiner stick protrude out of his loincloth by ten inches ( see-HE didn't know why but Esther put stick and dick together right away.

WELL -when Oorgy comes too after his blow stick experience -he says "Holy shit Mildred -what the fuck was that? -I want more!"

And Mildred says "Well you gave me a baby from your shtupping and THAT was your Father's Day gift"

And Oorgy replied "Oh yeah! -that's MY son allright -he's a beauty -strong and so smart -and well hung just like me -and i can't wait until NEXT Father's day"

Unfortunately with the taming of men and the rise of Christianity and sin and it's residual sexual repression - Material gifts were gradually substituted for the blow jobs by many women hence precipitating the rise in divorce and subsequent breakdown of the traditional family unit.

So you see how that first blow stick evolved into the Father's Day we celebrate today -AND - to this very day there are women who give one or less blow jobs a year -Just like Mildred.

So today let's have a moment of silence for all those fathers who will get a tie instead of a blow job.

AND give a big hip hip hooray to all those gals to whom a blow job is just another day -like a walk in the park.

But most of all a big hat's off to Esther Pipick The Witch and her first pupil --Mildred -and to Oorgy -First father and blow stick recipient.

Japs would Eat Their Mothers if They Had Fins

YOKOHAMA, Japan — “The Cove,” an Oscar-winning documentary about dolphin hunting in Japan, would seem to be a natural fit for movie theaters here, but so far the distributor has yet to find a single one that will screen the film.

Related

Times Topics: Japan

The New York Times

Many of the scenes in “The Cove” were filmed in Taiji.

And if Shuhei Nishimura and his compatriots on Japan’s nationalist fringe have their way, none ever will.

In a country that shudders at disharmony and remains wary of the far right’s violent history, the activists’ noisy rallies, online slanders, intimidating phone calls and veiled threats of violence are frightening theaters into canceling showings of “The Cove,” which not only depicts dolphin hunting in an unflattering light but also warns of high levels of mercury in fish, a disturbing disclosure in this seafood-loving nation.

DR. Moishe Pipick head of the World Marine Life Institute in Berne ,Switzerland said today:

"The Japs think that eating sea food will make them taller and give them Caucasian sized weiners -So -they are slowly but surely destroying many species of Ocean fish and mammals -including endangered whales and tuna and swordfish"

Dr.Pipick then answered an obvious question -" "Huh!Oh yes -the women? - They think sea food will enlarge their breasts so they can attract those big Caucasian weiners"

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Louisiana Chef Cooks With BP Oil

Master Chef Moishe Pipick -owner of the famous Chez Pipick on Bourbon Street is packing them in with his revolutionary new menu which uses oil from the BP spill to create delicious meals.

Chef Pipick said today: "I started out by experimenting with shrimp that had been contaminated by the oil -and Voila! -I sauteed the shrimp with cayenne pepper and a special secret balsamic vinegar sauce and my customers went wild for it"

Digibandit restaurant and food reporter Elise Mandelbaum asked the chef: "Weren't you afraid of folks getting sick from the oil?"

"No No!" said Chef Pipick; "Louisianan's have caste iron stomachs -they can eat a shit based boulliabase with enough hot sauce on it to choke a Mexican - with no problems whatsoever"

The Chef continued: "So - next - i experimented with oil soaked clams and mussels and they were delicious and people went crazy for them -and i ran out in two days"

"Next i developed an oil soaked fish stew with fennel and tomatoe sauce and i can't handle the demand I'm getting!"

Pipick went on: "Right now there are dozens of fishing boats working with me to catch oil coated fish and mollusks for my expanding BP enriched menu -AND:

"I have even developed an oil soaked Roast Duck entree' with peppercorns -AND if that goes over the way i think it will:

"Voila -oil enriched -braised Brown Pelican in a rich wine and cognac based gravy -and i am also experimenting with a stuffed oily Lobster vinagrette"

Elise Mandelbaum queried Chef Pippick' "Have your ingredients been approved by the FDA?"

"Hah1 Hah! Elise -you have nice breasts but you don't know how things work in Louisiana"

Female Frigidity Pill Unecessary says Dr. Moishe Pipick

Ever since Viagra met blockbuster success in 1998, the drug industry has sought a similar pill for women.

An image on the Boehringer Web site about depressed sexual desire.

Enlarge This Image

David Goldman/AP Images for Society for Women's Health Research

Dr. Laura Berman, left, a sex therapist, with Lisa Rinna.

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Now, a German drug giant says it has stumbled upon such a pill and is trying to persuade the Food and Drug Administrationthat its drug can help restore a depressed female sex drive. The effort has set off a debate over what constitutes a normal range of sexual desire among women, with critics saying the company is trying to turn a low libido into a medical pathology

Dr. Moishe Pipick, a psychologist and professor at New York University who has researched the topic of female sexual desire for more than a decade and plans to testify to the F.D.A. panel on Friday, said Boehringer had gone too far with its publicity effort.

“Women’s sex lives are often a struggle, a disappointment, an archipelago of regret,” he said. “Is there a small group of women who could benefit from medical intervention — probably.”

But he said that if the drug were approved, he worried that “the much larger group of women without any medical reason for their sexual distress -but who are married to fat ugly ignorant redneck men and devout Christians - will inevitably be misinformed and misled into thinking that there is a pill that can get them the sex life they read about, the one they think everyone else is having.”

Dr. Pipick went on:"While many experts say that unlike sexual dysfunction in men — which has an obvious physical component —sexual problems in women are much harder to diagnose. And among doctors and researchers, there is serious medical debate over whether female sexual problems are treatable with drugs. Some doctors advocate psychotherapy or counseling, while others have prescribed hormonal drugs approved for other uses."

Pipick stated: :There is also debate over how widespread hypoactive sexual desire disorder actually is among women. -But in my forty years of analyzing what i call "Frigid Women":

:The solution is for them to find a successful Jewish man and have some Chinese take out -and two or three martinis -and watch some porno -and eat some dark chocolate "

"And -let nature take it's course"

The Digibandit: In LA It's Mexican Kosher Deli Shock

The Digibandit: In LA It's Mexican Kosher Deli Shock

In LA It's Mexican Kosher Deli Shock

So I'm in LA and my son says "Hey Pops- How about a nice Corned Beef on rye -we're right near a famous LA kosher deli"

I says "Go on -I'm used to getting my corned beef and pastrami sandwiches at Katz' on West Houston street in NYC - you gotta be kidding! -Kosher deli in LA -That's an oxymoron"

Lee replies; "No way -Jerry's in Marina Del Ray has authentic NY caliber - max out artery clogging cold cuts on Jewish rye that will put lead in your old pencil -guaranteed!"

So here we are at Jerry's and i have just ordered a corned beef on rye from -get this - from a Mexican deli man.

Now just for the record -my position on cross border immigration is -"C'mon in! - EVERY Mexican illegal or illegal -in my opinion -is ten times the human being than all the white Americans living outside the blue states -AND i would prefer living next to a Mexican gang banger than any religious Christian or rich wasp"

BUT - i do not want to order a Corned beef on Rye from one of them -it's like putting mayo on a Brisket sandwich (which my son just ordered -and he is now officially out of my will.)

Oh -and when i asked Luis for some kosher garlic dills he informed me that he never heard of them -I was waiting for him to ask me if i would like some jalepenos instead (in which case i would have called immigration)

My son said -"Oh poppy -you are an old fashioned Jew!"

SO! -LA has turned my son into an anti-semite -and is basically transforming authentic corned beef and pastrami and brisket and salami sandwiches -Kosher Deli et. al -into Jewish Burritos.

Oh -and my skinny -virtually fat free Corned Beef sandwich tasted like crap!

Fuck Jerry's!

Best Torture For Muslim Extremists - Nagging American Wives

Muslims treat their women like Korean's treat dogs! - As a result they have NO idea how viscious a nagging wife can be -especially a good old fashioned average "American Nagging Wife"(i don't include girlfriend nagging (just as viscious) because Muslims don't have girlfriends - that would imply courtship and options for the women)

So - you put a suspected Arab terrorist in a room for one hour with a nagging American wife and they will be screaming; "Hey - no fair - i was supposed to get waterboarded - please Allah - kill me -please stop her! -ok ok the bomb maker is....."

Oh - and that's just your average run of the mill American nagging wife, For really hard cases we bring in maybe a Jewish wife whose husband hasn't touched her in five years because she gained ninety pounds since the wedding and all he hears after a sixteen hour day in the jewelry exchange is:

"Morris -you failure -you weak piece of shit -where have you been -I'm late for mahjong - i should have married Abe - he's a doctor -he lives in Scarsdale - he still has hair ......." Well - you know the drill.

You put this viscious nagging Jewess in a room with Al Zaweirdi - he'll give you Osama's address and private telephone number in twenty minutes -maybe less? Remember -these lucky dogs have NEVER been nagged by a woman -- If a Muslim woman were to say even;

"Mamood - i think maybe you should tale a bath -it's been six months -whaddya think?" - then - in the morning she would be in the town square trying to dodge an avalanche of stones -andthat would be a relief after what Mamood would put her through -and the children too.

How about:"Mamood -you stinky failure of a shit husband - you weak hunk of crap - why don't you DO Something - why don't we ever go out -why don't you touch me - you worm - where have you been - your friends are all you care about - you eat too much - lose some weight -for God's sake get a raise - turn off the ball game - help with the children - what's wrong with you - see a psychiatrist ......

"At this point Mamood would be writing down the location of every Mosque in Sadr City with munitions in it -and then he'd eagerly rat out his son and his brothers.

C'mon you CIA guys - give it a try - you know I'm right - use one of YOUR wives.

Fox Announces "Desperate Gulf Coast Women"

Mike (the midget) Darnhell -Prexy of Fox Reality Tv said today:

"Those redneck hottie housewives down in the Gulf Coast and Florida Panhandle have always been on our minds in terms of a "Desperate Housewives" type program -But - now! -It's just gotta happen!"

He went on: "These women will fuck a snake while their hubbies are out catching crawfish or alligators or pelicans or whatever USED to swim out in those waters - under pre BP conditions (we like to say BBP or ABP -kinda gives it a biblical twist) --heh heh heh!"

Darnhell continued; "But now with their kids using tar balls for beach toys and their husbands broke and shitfaced all the time --the whole place is like one big housewife whorehouse!"

"Anyway the show is gonna be kickass powerful -and it's not just about these "Oil Widows" heh heh - i thought up that one:

"This show is gonna exhibit the deep down cultural impact of an Oil Spill on the sexual habits of horny redneck housewives AND their oily families"

He concluded; "Here at Fox TV we care about the environment and all them destroyed critters and all that hot oil -But -let's never forget:

"The Desperate Gulf Coast Housewives" -and THEIR Hot OIl!"

New Study Finds That Hunters Have Tiny Penis'

For years psychiatrists and psychologists and cognitive neurologists have tried to understand how human males can enjoy destroying wildlife.

"Blasting away at beautiful creatures -- and enjoying the susequent pain and destruction of sentient creatures for no absolute necessity, has always baffled .us" said Mathew Pinsker,national director of Research into Morons (or RIM).

RIM has now conclusively documented that animal killers are driven to compensate for a lack of complete "Manhood"

Make Abortion Legal Up To Five Years Old

Thursday, June 03, 2010

At least 13 other states have introduced or passed legislation this year.

The new laws are the religious cookoo's latest attempts to make the big tooth fairy (God) in the sky happy

New laws range from an Arizona ban on coverage of abortion in the state employees’ health plan toa ban in Nebraska on all abortions after 20 weeks, on the grounds that the fetus at that stage can feel pain.

I mean my geraniums experience more reflexive pain when i prune them than a fetus

And by the time a kid is five years old and raised in a cookoo religious environment -we are talking about a LIFETIME of pain for them and all of us -and the future fetus' they will generate - so:

Let's just send them out for euthenizing and Then they can go peacefully up to Heaven and have fun with the Angels --and leave their redneck parents more time for drinking and hunting and kicking the shit out of each other -and their dogs and remaining siblings.

Oh - but the wonderful irony is that when the rednecks pass all these laws and stop black teenagers from aborting their future criminals -they will need to buy a lot more ammo and send all their daughters to Denmark.

Israel Should Just Torpedo Blockade Runners

And then pick up the survivoes and throw them in dark cells and then torture them.

That's what would happen in any of the BAD places on Earth where crimes against humanity of demonic horror are being perpetrated in places like:

North Korea and Iran and The Congo and Sudan and Chechnya - and Most of Africa - and laos and Myannamar and more than half the countries in the world that are rated as horror chambers by the UN .

Israel is like Sweden compared to 90% of the world's slaughterhouses -And that is why the Jew hating radicals and misdirected peacenicks are not afraid of being arrested there,

I mean -where would YOU like to be arrested? -Turkey? China? Iran? Syria? North Korea? South Carolina or Texas?

Or Israel?

So go fuck with the Jews who are fighting maniac Moslems 24/7 -You can go get away from your crappy life and become validated as a hero.

But go fuck with some REALLY bad actors who make the Israeli Palestine mess look like a Garden Party:

And you won't be deported -you'll be gang raped and just dissapear -forever.

Poor - Fat - Velveeta Eaters Should be Profiled

Forget profiling illegals you Arizonan's! -A new study by the The National Research Institute has conclusively determined that :

"Folks who are poor and fat and eat Velveeta cheese - represent most of the social dysfunction in our society" -said Dr. Moishe Pipick -The Research Institutes president today - from their worldwide headquarters in Berne, Switzerland.

Dr Pipick related the studies key findings as follows:

"These folks commit 38% more misdemeanors - 28% more felonious assaults -56% more incidents of spousal and child abuse - and 78% of the men own guns and are avid hunters and have IQ levels that are grossly marginal."

"Furthermore" - he went on - "88% are white conservative Christians - 95% have seen a UFO and believe in Creationism - 46% live in the deep south or Texas - and over 72% have never experienced oral sex and have sex (with humans) less than eight times a year"

"And as suspected" -- He stated - "84% are alcoholics and drug users and regularly listen to Rush Limbaugh -and are in the lower 5% socio economic range"

Dr. Pipick concluded "So it's vividly apparent that our social profiling attention should be directed at Poor -Fat -Velveeta cheese eaters."

"Forget the illegals and Muslims!"