The digibandit has received a copy of Britney Spear's New Year resolutions - and here are these astonishing revelations:
I will become a devout Islamo Fascist!
As a Muslim Fundamentalist i will not have any fun - only forced sex with smelly violent men - no more kinky pleasure - no more blow jobs or anal shtupping. (i will really miss that!)
I will hate all Jews and Infidels and Sunni Muslims - and i don't know why and it doesn't matter - hating is good!
I will not engage in any art related activities - Allah does not like TV or Music or Dancing or Books or basically anything beautiful that might take away from worshipping him.
I will recite prayers from the Koran five times a day - it doesn't matter if i understand what I'm saying - most of my fellow Muslims can't read or write anyway.
I will not expose any of my body in public - so i might as well just get as fat as a house like most Muslim women - i kinda like this part but i don't think rice will replace Ben and Jerry's.
I will enjoy having no basic rights - as a woman i will basically enjoy being one step higher on the social ladder than a goat.
It will be fun being hot and dirty and oppressed and totally ignorant - surrounded by violence and watching my children have just as much fun as me.
If i get real lucky one of my children will blow himself up and a whole batch of Infidels - and then he can send for me to join him in Paradise.
Hey - it's gotta be better than my life in Hollywood?
Tuesday, January 01, 2008
Friday, December 28, 2007
Play New "Wack Off Or Scratch Off" Lottery Game - Win Sex
Starting in march – in Texas –which has the highest number of scratch off lottery players in the country (mostly poor and uneducated minorities) – those players will be able to win blow jobs and various (and all) varieties of sex acts.
Buck Beefy - the head of the Texas Lottery Association, said in a press conference today; “ The tasty sex offerings will be cross genderized and offer mult-racial and ethnic and even sex with disabled hookers in wheel chairs.” (no illegals allowed of course – heh heh)
A fifty dollar winning ticket will get you a pretty fair piece of ass (a hunnert dollar prize will be a REAL tasty deal) - and for just ten dollars you can get a hand job or a good lickin from, say, old widow Munson down behind the truck stop on I95 – heh – heh”
“Oh –almost forgot – there will be grand prize winners - like a five-hundred dollar hit will get some lucky man or woman or combo (heh heh) a weekend in Dallas with Britney Spears and/or Rush Limbaugh –you might say they’ll be a livin in high Oxycotin – heh heh,”
“You can even pick from a group of those young whores that are all over MySpace (Fox just loves the cross promotion and that some off the lottery proceeds go to the State education fund) –That Rupert Murdoch is a real swell feller.and if this ‘Sex Scratch Off” thang get’s a goin good, he said they will make it into a reality show”
"Scratch Off or Wack Off?" -“ Now that’s A surefire reality show hit for Fox TV -Texas should bring in a pile of dough for their schools - and those young sluts on MySpace will make a lot of new friends.
What a country!
Buck Beefy - the head of the Texas Lottery Association, said in a press conference today; “ The tasty sex offerings will be cross genderized and offer mult-racial and ethnic and even sex with disabled hookers in wheel chairs.” (no illegals allowed of course – heh heh)
A fifty dollar winning ticket will get you a pretty fair piece of ass (a hunnert dollar prize will be a REAL tasty deal) - and for just ten dollars you can get a hand job or a good lickin from, say, old widow Munson down behind the truck stop on I95 – heh – heh”
“Oh –almost forgot – there will be grand prize winners - like a five-hundred dollar hit will get some lucky man or woman or combo (heh heh) a weekend in Dallas with Britney Spears and/or Rush Limbaugh –you might say they’ll be a livin in high Oxycotin – heh heh,”
“You can even pick from a group of those young whores that are all over MySpace (Fox just loves the cross promotion and that some off the lottery proceeds go to the State education fund) –That Rupert Murdoch is a real swell feller.and if this ‘Sex Scratch Off” thang get’s a goin good, he said they will make it into a reality show”
"Scratch Off or Wack Off?" -“ Now that’s A surefire reality show hit for Fox TV -Texas should bring in a pile of dough for their schools - and those young sluts on MySpace will make a lot of new friends.
What a country!
United States To Outsource Prison Population
Well it looks like - if you break the law in the good ole USA -You will do your time in some Foreign country. Maybe India or China if your lucky - but it could just as easily be the Congo or Somalia - or whoever makes the lowest bid to keep you in captivity.
And with a new report showing that one out of one-hundred people in the good ole USA are doin some kind of jail time - this plan comes just intime to help our hurtin economy.
"Jules Hymovitz,head of the US Bureau of Prisons said; "We outsource most manufacturing and a ton of business services -- and even personal secretaries and tax and legal work, and you name it to India and China -- well - why not our huge and growing prison population?"
He continued; "It costs almost thirty thousand dollars a year to keep our criminals behind bars - hell -- China says they will take in the whole lot for ten thousand a piece - and we figure some countries could come in for under five thousand (and if the liberals don't squawk we could probably get some countries to pay us for these folks )"
"Wer'e talking about billions of dollars in savings to the US taxpayer - and i'll betcha that the prospect of doing your time over in a third world country planting yams and getting cornholed regularly by some leper - will cut down on crime considerably."
He concluded; "And -the way those countries treat their prisoners I'll bet most of em won't be coming back home to restart their lives of crime."
Outsourcing is a beautiful thing!
And with a new report showing that one out of one-hundred people in the good ole USA are doin some kind of jail time - this plan comes just intime to help our hurtin economy.
"Jules Hymovitz,head of the US Bureau of Prisons said; "We outsource most manufacturing and a ton of business services -- and even personal secretaries and tax and legal work, and you name it to India and China -- well - why not our huge and growing prison population?"
He continued; "It costs almost thirty thousand dollars a year to keep our criminals behind bars - hell -- China says they will take in the whole lot for ten thousand a piece - and we figure some countries could come in for under five thousand (and if the liberals don't squawk we could probably get some countries to pay us for these folks )"
"Wer'e talking about billions of dollars in savings to the US taxpayer - and i'll betcha that the prospect of doing your time over in a third world country planting yams and getting cornholed regularly by some leper - will cut down on crime considerably."
He concluded; "And -the way those countries treat their prisoners I'll bet most of em won't be coming back home to restart their lives of crime."
Outsourcing is a beautiful thing!
Thursday, December 27, 2007
A Vacuum - Lots of Time - The Big Bang - Evolution - Genetics - Synthetic Life - Goodbye God
The following is an actual scientific report - as reported on MSNBC - check it out.
That first cell of synthetic life — made from the basic chemicals in DNA — may not seem like much to non-scientists. For one thing, you’ll have to look in a microscope to see it.
“Creating protocells has the potential to shed new life on our place in the universe,” Bedau said. “This will remove one of the few fundamental mysteries about creation in the universe and our role.”
And several scientists believe man-made life forms will one day offer the potential for solving a variety of problems, from fighting diseases to locking up greenhouse gases to eating toxic waste.
Bedau figures there are three major hurdles to creating synthetic life:
A container, or membrane, for the cell to keep bad molecules out, allow good ones, and the ability to multiply.
A genetic system that controls the functions of the cell, enabling it to reproduce and mutate in response to environmental changes.
A metabolism that extracts raw materials from the environment as food and then changes it into energy.
One of the leaders in the field, Jack Szostak at Harvard Medical School, predicts that within the next six months, scientists will report evidence that the first step — creating a cell membrane — is “not a big problem.” Scientists are using fatty acids in that effort.
Szostak is also optimistic about the next step — getting nucleotides, the building blocks of DNA, to form a working genetic system.
His idea is that once the container is made, if scientists add nucleotides in the right proportions, then Darwinian evolution could simply take over.
“We aren’t smart enough to design things, we just let evolution do the hard work and then we figure out what happened,” Szostak said.
In Gainesville, Fla.,
Steve Benner, a biological chemist at the Foundation for Applied Molecular Evolution is attacking that problem by going outside of natural genetics. Normal DNA consists of four bases — adenine, cytosine, guanine and thymine (known as A,C,G,T) — molecules that spell out the genetic code in pairs. Benner is trying to add eight new bases to the genetic alphabet.
Bedau said there are legitimate worries about creating life that could “run amok,” but there are ways of addressing it, and it will be a very long time before that is a problem.
“When these things are created, they’re going to be so weak, it’ll be a huge achievement if you can keep them alive for an hour in the lab,” he said. “But them getting out and taking over, never in our imagination could this happen.”
I can't wait! - Freedom from the mumbo jumbo crowd is on it's way. -- At last!
That first cell of synthetic life — made from the basic chemicals in DNA — may not seem like much to non-scientists. For one thing, you’ll have to look in a microscope to see it.
“Creating protocells has the potential to shed new life on our place in the universe,” Bedau said. “This will remove one of the few fundamental mysteries about creation in the universe and our role.”
And several scientists believe man-made life forms will one day offer the potential for solving a variety of problems, from fighting diseases to locking up greenhouse gases to eating toxic waste.
Bedau figures there are three major hurdles to creating synthetic life:
A container, or membrane, for the cell to keep bad molecules out, allow good ones, and the ability to multiply.
A genetic system that controls the functions of the cell, enabling it to reproduce and mutate in response to environmental changes.
A metabolism that extracts raw materials from the environment as food and then changes it into energy.
One of the leaders in the field, Jack Szostak at Harvard Medical School, predicts that within the next six months, scientists will report evidence that the first step — creating a cell membrane — is “not a big problem.” Scientists are using fatty acids in that effort.
Szostak is also optimistic about the next step — getting nucleotides, the building blocks of DNA, to form a working genetic system.
His idea is that once the container is made, if scientists add nucleotides in the right proportions, then Darwinian evolution could simply take over.
“We aren’t smart enough to design things, we just let evolution do the hard work and then we figure out what happened,” Szostak said.
In Gainesville, Fla.,
Steve Benner, a biological chemist at the Foundation for Applied Molecular Evolution is attacking that problem by going outside of natural genetics. Normal DNA consists of four bases — adenine, cytosine, guanine and thymine (known as A,C,G,T) — molecules that spell out the genetic code in pairs. Benner is trying to add eight new bases to the genetic alphabet.
Bedau said there are legitimate worries about creating life that could “run amok,” but there are ways of addressing it, and it will be a very long time before that is a problem.
“When these things are created, they’re going to be so weak, it’ll be a huge achievement if you can keep them alive for an hour in the lab,” he said. “But them getting out and taking over, never in our imagination could this happen.”
I can't wait! - Freedom from the mumbo jumbo crowd is on it's way. -- At last!
Tuesday, December 25, 2007
Soon God Will Be Dead - Thank God
So i asked my son this georgous LA Christmas mornin; "Now your mother is a religious catholic and you were christened -do you believe all that Jesus/Revelation/ Divine Deity/Heaven-Hell/ Literal Scripture Miracle/Blind-faith Stuff?"
Thank God - he replied. "Are you fucking crazy Dad?"
So i said; "No profanity in the Digibandit household -and if you don't believe in God where do you get your sense of right and wrong from - i mean why are you such a kindhearted and loving and charitable person?"(the wackos say secularists have no moral foundation)
He said;"Because i'm a fucking normal human being - and for most of these fucking religious asshole repressed hypocrites - Church is just half time in the worldwide video game called " Slaughter The Innocents Because They Are Different" - And, anyway, all the cool people would be cool even if they weren't completely brainwashed into believing that crapola when they were little."
I said; "Stop cursing - here's a check for ten thousand dollars - buy some drugs and take your girlfriend to Las Vegas for New Years - on me. -You have allowed me to die in peace. - I'm so proud of you!"
"Keep your money poppy - give it to some poor folks -and i'll try to stop cursing, but it's hard being around you. -and anyway wer'e working at the Santa Monica food bank on New Years."
God can't last much longer - these kids today are too moral -- Thank God!
Merry Xmas
Thank God - he replied. "Are you fucking crazy Dad?"
So i said; "No profanity in the Digibandit household -and if you don't believe in God where do you get your sense of right and wrong from - i mean why are you such a kindhearted and loving and charitable person?"(the wackos say secularists have no moral foundation)
He said;"Because i'm a fucking normal human being - and for most of these fucking religious asshole repressed hypocrites - Church is just half time in the worldwide video game called " Slaughter The Innocents Because They Are Different" - And, anyway, all the cool people would be cool even if they weren't completely brainwashed into believing that crapola when they were little."
I said; "Stop cursing - here's a check for ten thousand dollars - buy some drugs and take your girlfriend to Las Vegas for New Years - on me. -You have allowed me to die in peace. - I'm so proud of you!"
"Keep your money poppy - give it to some poor folks -and i'll try to stop cursing, but it's hard being around you. -and anyway wer'e working at the Santa Monica food bank on New Years."
God can't last much longer - these kids today are too moral -- Thank God!
Merry Xmas
Thursday, December 20, 2007
Merry Xmas From China - Lead For Tots - And Brain Damage
It's simple - the current levels of lead in Chinese made toys are destructive to the long term cognitive development of your children.
Unanimous recommendations by doctors and scientists are to decrease the amount of lead deemed currently acceptable by over ten fold. (and the Chinks currently violate even the unacceptable existing standards for lead content)
"Oh -I justcan't seem to find any toys my little Amy wants that aren't from China?"
Listen you fucking moron -- little Amy will be drooling all over herself in the stock room of a Chinese corporation when she's twenty one -earning seven dollars an hour - and will give birth to your grandchild who will be ironically Chinese / Mongolian - with a ten pound head.
For Christ's sake go buy your kids some books - or crafts or anything that's made in America without lead paint.
Unanimous recommendations by doctors and scientists are to decrease the amount of lead deemed currently acceptable by over ten fold. (and the Chinks currently violate even the unacceptable existing standards for lead content)
"Oh -I justcan't seem to find any toys my little Amy wants that aren't from China?"
Listen you fucking moron -- little Amy will be drooling all over herself in the stock room of a Chinese corporation when she's twenty one -earning seven dollars an hour - and will give birth to your grandchild who will be ironically Chinese / Mongolian - with a ten pound head.
For Christ's sake go buy your kids some books - or crafts or anything that's made in America without lead paint.
Wednesday, December 19, 2007
Huckabee Should Start Healing Iowans - Says The Lord
With the Christian extremists in Iowa pleading for some sign of revelation from Minister Huckleberry - he has announced:
"I have been trying not to show off my healing powers during the campaign - but last night The Lord said that he and Jesus agreed that in the interests of getting me elected as President, - I now had a green light to heal some lame Iowans."
"I told the Lord that most of the Iowans were lame - he said to choose a half dozen of the lamest"
"I hope no one will think I'm showing off, but since God and Jesus say it's the right thing to do - i just have to go along with their plan and hope for the best."
"I asked the Lord if it was okay for me to heal my very fucked up son - but he said not to waste my time and that i had fucked him up so bad he couldn't be saved"
"I get the feelin that God is a dog lover."
PS --And for those of you who have been too busy shopping for more shit you don't need -- Google it up and read all about David Hucklebee. Ole Huckleberry raised a real winner here.(a dog torturer and was recently caught with a handgun going through airport security)
"I have been trying not to show off my healing powers during the campaign - but last night The Lord said that he and Jesus agreed that in the interests of getting me elected as President, - I now had a green light to heal some lame Iowans."
"I told the Lord that most of the Iowans were lame - he said to choose a half dozen of the lamest"
"I hope no one will think I'm showing off, but since God and Jesus say it's the right thing to do - i just have to go along with their plan and hope for the best."
"I asked the Lord if it was okay for me to heal my very fucked up son - but he said not to waste my time and that i had fucked him up so bad he couldn't be saved"
"I get the feelin that God is a dog lover."
PS --And for those of you who have been too busy shopping for more shit you don't need -- Google it up and read all about David Hucklebee. Ole Huckleberry raised a real winner here.(a dog torturer and was recently caught with a handgun going through airport security)
Monday, December 17, 2007
Please dear Lord - Send Us A Sign - Destroy Iowa
Boy would i like to be a fly on the wall up in heaven watching the Lord's reaction to the horseshit flowing out of the mouths of America's newest Pilgrims - Mitt Romney and Mike Huckabee - as they bob and weave their way through the ignorant religious puke talk that serves as original thinking and constructive dialogue in this goober state - full of fundamentalist morons.
My God - it's like listening to a conversation between a bunch of fucking ignorant hillbillies. Yokels whose search for insight and clarity ended with their childhood indoctrination into a mindset of superstition and magic and miracles. They joined the circus as children and are still traveling with the two headed fat lady and the fire breathing dwarf on their way to Paradise with absolute certainty - in absolute ignorance.
Jesus Christ is probably saying to his daddy -- "Poppy - you let me be fucking crucified so these assholes could manipulate your message of love and salvation and charity into political soundbites ?"
"It's okay my sonny boy - Mitt's goin to hell in any case -and that fucking phony moron Huckleberry? -- I'm gonna have him spend eternity in the shower with Sodom"
Send us a sign Lord - Please - send a plague over Iowa!
My God - it's like listening to a conversation between a bunch of fucking ignorant hillbillies. Yokels whose search for insight and clarity ended with their childhood indoctrination into a mindset of superstition and magic and miracles. They joined the circus as children and are still traveling with the two headed fat lady and the fire breathing dwarf on their way to Paradise with absolute certainty - in absolute ignorance.
Jesus Christ is probably saying to his daddy -- "Poppy - you let me be fucking crucified so these assholes could manipulate your message of love and salvation and charity into political soundbites ?"
"It's okay my sonny boy - Mitt's goin to hell in any case -and that fucking phony moron Huckleberry? -- I'm gonna have him spend eternity in the shower with Sodom"
Send us a sign Lord - Please - send a plague over Iowa!
Saturday, December 15, 2007
Illegal Gang Guns For Gift Certificates - God Bless America
Yep - out in Compton California the gang bangers were getting really out of control so the local government in association with the local fuzz came up with a solution that will go down with the signing of the Magna Carta as a total breakthrough in the march of Civilization!
"Bring in your illegal gun and get a fifty dollar gift certificate to Home Depot" -- no questions asked, and if you think this is another of my deranged digital delusions, just google it up.
Guns are coming in like crazy - but these gang bangers are not stupid, so their turning in their shitty old "pieces" and keeping the Glocks and Kalishnakovs oiled and ready.
"You ain't getting my Glock motherfuckah -for no redneck gift certificate. And the only reason i turned in my grandaddy's flintlock is because i traded the gift certificate for five vials of crack;" said Lubama Meosha a local gang banger.
"Well - what would it take to get you to turn in your Glock?" i asked.
"Hmmm - i would say a big bag of heroine - a case of Colt 44 malt liquor and a blowjob (wit a woman)"
Well what the hell are we waiting for? - A solution to violent crime in America -- at last!"
"Bring in your illegal gun and get a fifty dollar gift certificate to Home Depot" -- no questions asked, and if you think this is another of my deranged digital delusions, just google it up.
Guns are coming in like crazy - but these gang bangers are not stupid, so their turning in their shitty old "pieces" and keeping the Glocks and Kalishnakovs oiled and ready.
"You ain't getting my Glock motherfuckah -for no redneck gift certificate. And the only reason i turned in my grandaddy's flintlock is because i traded the gift certificate for five vials of crack;" said Lubama Meosha a local gang banger.
"Well - what would it take to get you to turn in your Glock?" i asked.
"Hmmm - i would say a big bag of heroine - a case of Colt 44 malt liquor and a blowjob (wit a woman)"
Well what the hell are we waiting for? - A solution to violent crime in America -- at last!"
Friday, December 14, 2007
Rush Limbaugh Endorses Barak Obama - Says Jesus Made Him Do It!
"Nobody really cares about Oprah Winfrey endorsing a black candidate - Obama owns that vote out of the box and anyone with half a brain can see she has the hots for him - I'm sure she had an orgasm during the endorsement ceremony. (maybe two);" said Rush Limbaugh in his extraordinary statement of support for Obama.
Bandit political reporter Elise Muffkowitz asked Limbaugh for an explanation and he replied;"He just cracks me up - i mean the guy kills me - he has a great sense of humor and i love his wife and the fact that he has such an interesting background and that he was honest about being a druggy in college - and that he has no experience or creds that would prepare him for the job as we know it."
"But Mr. limbaugh",asked Elise, - " You hate democrats and also, basically, black people - dontcha?"
Rush replied. "C'mon Muffky, you don't really believe he's black do ya? -- and besides, i had an epiphany last week!"
He continued, "I was saying my nightly prayers and suddenly Jesus Christ appeared in front of me! At first i thought it was the Oxycotin or maybe Bill O'Reilly playing one of his practical jokes (like the time he brought a sheep into my kitchen and was fucking it when i came home) - but it WAS Jesus and he said...."
"Rush - you have done some important work for Pops and me, but this is your most important assignment -- we cannot allow that viscious cunt Hillary to be elected President - the only way to stop her is for you to bring all the rednecks over to Oblama - we know it's gonna hurt - but that's the way Pops want's it."
"Of Course my Lord! - Oh, and i think his name is Obama not Oblama" i replied to Jesus -and he said the following and disappeared in a cloud of dust - like the Lone Ranger"
"Don't nitpick with me Rush - Oblama -Oblamama - Obadama - none of them African names are in the Bible so who gives a shit?"
"Anyway -I'm for Obama and you all better be too!"
Bandit political reporter Elise Muffkowitz asked Limbaugh for an explanation and he replied;"He just cracks me up - i mean the guy kills me - he has a great sense of humor and i love his wife and the fact that he has such an interesting background and that he was honest about being a druggy in college - and that he has no experience or creds that would prepare him for the job as we know it."
"But Mr. limbaugh",asked Elise, - " You hate democrats and also, basically, black people - dontcha?"
Rush replied. "C'mon Muffky, you don't really believe he's black do ya? -- and besides, i had an epiphany last week!"
He continued, "I was saying my nightly prayers and suddenly Jesus Christ appeared in front of me! At first i thought it was the Oxycotin or maybe Bill O'Reilly playing one of his practical jokes (like the time he brought a sheep into my kitchen and was fucking it when i came home) - but it WAS Jesus and he said...."
"Rush - you have done some important work for Pops and me, but this is your most important assignment -- we cannot allow that viscious cunt Hillary to be elected President - the only way to stop her is for you to bring all the rednecks over to Oblama - we know it's gonna hurt - but that's the way Pops want's it."
"Of Course my Lord! - Oh, and i think his name is Obama not Oblama" i replied to Jesus -and he said the following and disappeared in a cloud of dust - like the Lone Ranger"
"Don't nitpick with me Rush - Oblama -Oblamama - Obadama - none of them African names are in the Bible so who gives a shit?"
"Anyway -I'm for Obama and you all better be too!"
Tuesday, December 11, 2007
America Cannot Have A president Named "MITT"!
I got to thinkin about the name --Mitt! - And why in the hell would anyone name their child Mitt? - In most neighborhoods if you are named Mitt you learn to become a polished street fighter very quickly ie. "Hey Mitt! - Somethin stinks! --Did you shit? --Mitt!" and then it's boom bam boom unless you grew up in "Mitt's" swanky neighborhood where most of the kids have verbs and nouns for first names - like 'Mitt's" son Tag whose best friend is probably named Lane.
"Now Mitt you make sure you put away the croquet equipment after you and Laney are finished" says Momma Romney - "And don't get your Gucci's all muddy because we have to get over to the club for dinner with Poppa Mitt."
I couldn't resist logging onto what'sinaname.com to get the full origin of "Mitt's" mittiness - and here it is for your enjoyment - oh you better have a puke bowl handy because it's not very pretty!
"Then there's the former governor of Massachusetts and current Republican presidential candidate, Mitt Romney. The humorist Roy Blount Jr. says every time he hears "Mitt Romney" he thinks it's a German konditorei order, like "mit schlag." Me, I can't help thinking "Mitt" is an abbreviation for "Mittens." Like Ralph Wiggum's cat. Mr. Romney's given name is Willard Milton--again, not a name likely to win points on playgrounds. (For the record, the double name honors a relative, Milton Romney, and the hotel magnate and fellow Mormon J. Willard Marriott, Mitt's father's best friend.) So why not "Will"? Or even "Milt"? Why the inevitable association with fingerless hand coverings? And why, oh why, are the sins of the grandfather visited on the grandson? Why did Mitt name one of his five sons Tagg? Because he's It?"
Now - having read this - if you can still consider voting for this fagot - i would suggest shaving your ass and walking backwards -- hand in hand with your wife and kids - Biffy Buffy and Muffy = off a fucking cliff onto some rocks into the ocean near your seaside vacation home.
"Now Mitt you make sure you put away the croquet equipment after you and Laney are finished" says Momma Romney - "And don't get your Gucci's all muddy because we have to get over to the club for dinner with Poppa Mitt."
I couldn't resist logging onto what'sinaname.com to get the full origin of "Mitt's" mittiness - and here it is for your enjoyment - oh you better have a puke bowl handy because it's not very pretty!
"Then there's the former governor of Massachusetts and current Republican presidential candidate, Mitt Romney. The humorist Roy Blount Jr. says every time he hears "Mitt Romney" he thinks it's a German konditorei order, like "mit schlag." Me, I can't help thinking "Mitt" is an abbreviation for "Mittens." Like Ralph Wiggum's cat. Mr. Romney's given name is Willard Milton--again, not a name likely to win points on playgrounds. (For the record, the double name honors a relative, Milton Romney, and the hotel magnate and fellow Mormon J. Willard Marriott, Mitt's father's best friend.) So why not "Will"? Or even "Milt"? Why the inevitable association with fingerless hand coverings? And why, oh why, are the sins of the grandfather visited on the grandson? Why did Mitt name one of his five sons Tagg? Because he's It?"
Now - having read this - if you can still consider voting for this fagot - i would suggest shaving your ass and walking backwards -- hand in hand with your wife and kids - Biffy Buffy and Muffy = off a fucking cliff onto some rocks into the ocean near your seaside vacation home.
Clarence "Porno" Thomas Does It Again
So guess who was one of the two Supremo Court Justices to vote against allowing judges to use their discretion, regarding the federal minimum sentencing guidelines when ruling on crack cocaine sentences (which have been set as one-hundred times the penalties for powdered cocaine).
This draconian law has resulted in thousands of young black, non violent first offenders being locked up for long prison terms for the same crimes that allow mostly white "suburban sniffers" to get off with probation.
Clarence Thomas' rulings have done more damage to the social progress of black Americans than any "Jim Crow" redneck - it's a fucking shame that this bum squeaked through the nominating process by one lousy vote and wound up in a lifetime position to act out his pathology against his own people. (His warped social and emotional development have been extensively documented on this blog)
I hope every member of the Senate judiciary committee who voted for his nomination dies and comes back as a crack addict - in the meantime it's time to start a movement for continuing mass protests against Thomas - we can't fire him but we can sure sit outside his home and office with our signs "Hey Clarence - What porno Tape You Watchin Tonight?"
And i know professor Anita Hill will be marching right along with us.
This draconian law has resulted in thousands of young black, non violent first offenders being locked up for long prison terms for the same crimes that allow mostly white "suburban sniffers" to get off with probation.
Clarence Thomas' rulings have done more damage to the social progress of black Americans than any "Jim Crow" redneck - it's a fucking shame that this bum squeaked through the nominating process by one lousy vote and wound up in a lifetime position to act out his pathology against his own people. (His warped social and emotional development have been extensively documented on this blog)
I hope every member of the Senate judiciary committee who voted for his nomination dies and comes back as a crack addict - in the meantime it's time to start a movement for continuing mass protests against Thomas - we can't fire him but we can sure sit outside his home and office with our signs "Hey Clarence - What porno Tape You Watchin Tonight?"
And i know professor Anita Hill will be marching right along with us.
Friday, December 07, 2007
Everything You Need To Know About Muslim Justice
By AYAAN HIRSI ALI
Published: December 7, 2007
The woman and the man guilty of adultery or fornication, flog each of them with 100 stripes: Let no compassion move you in their case, in a matter prescribed by Allah, if you believe in Allah and the Last Day. (Koran 24:2)
IN the last few weeks, in three widely publicized episodes, we have seen Islamic justice enacted in ways that should make Muslim moderates rise up in horror.
A 20-year-old woman from Qatif, Saudi Arabia, reported that she had been abducted by several men and repeatedly raped. But judges found the victim herself to be guilty. Her crime is called “mingling”: when she was abducted, she was in a car with a man not related to her by blood or marriage, and in Saudi Arabia, that is illegal. Last month, she was sentenced to six months in prison and 200 lashes with a bamboo cane.
Two hundred lashes are enough to kill a strong man. Women usually receive no more than 30 lashes at a time, which means that for seven weeks the “girl from Qatif,” as she’s usually described in news articles, will dread her next session with Islamic justice. When she is released, her life will certainly never return to normal: already there have been reports that her brother has tried to kill her because her “crime” has tarnished her family’s honor.
We also saw Islamic justice in action in Sudan, when a 54-year-old British teacher named Gillian Gibbons was sentenced to 15 days in jail before the government pardoned her this week; she could have faced 40 lashes. When she began a reading project with her class involving a teddy bear, Ms. Gibbons suggested the children choose a name for it. They chose Muhammad; she let them do it. This was deemed to be blasphemy.
Then there’s Taslima Nasreen, the 45-year-old Bangladeshi writer who bravely defends women’s rights in the Muslim world. Forced to flee Bangladesh, she has been living in India. But Muslim groups there want her expelled, and one has offered 500,000 rupees for her head. In August she was assaulted by Muslim militants in Hyderabad, and in recent weeks she has had to leave Calcutta and then Rajasthan. Taslima Nasreen’s visa expires next year, and she fears she will not be allowed to live in India again.
It is often said that Islam has been “hijacked” by a small extremist group of radical fundamentalists. The vast majority of Muslims are said to be moderates.
But where are the moderates? Where are the Muslim voices raised over the terrible injustice of incidents like these? How many Muslims are willing to stand up and say, in the case of the girl from Qatif, that this manner of justice is appalling, brutal and bigoted — and that no matter who said it was the right thing to do, and how long ago it was said, this should no longer be done?
Usually, Muslim groups like the Organization of the Islamic Conference are quick to defend any affront to the image of Islam. The organization, which represents 57 Muslim states, sent four ambassadors to the leader of my political party in the Netherlands asking him to expel me from Parliament after I gave a newspaper interview in 2003 noting that by Western standards some of the Prophet Muhammad’s behavior would be unconscionable. A few years later, Muslim ambassadors to Denmark protested the cartoons of Muhammad and demanded that their perpetrators be prosecuted.
But while the incidents in Saudi Arabia, Sudan and India have done more to damage the image of Islamic justice than a dozen cartoons depicting the Prophet Muhammad, the organizations that lined up to protest the hideous Danish offense to Islam are quiet now.
I wish there were more Islamic moderates. For example, I would welcome some guidance from that famous Muslim theologian of moderation, Tariq Ramadan. But when there is true suffering, real cruelty in the name of Islam, we hear, first, denial from all these organizations that are so concerned about Islam’s image. We hear that violence is not in the Koran, that Islam means peace, that this is a hijacking by extremists and a smear campaign and so on. But the evidence mounts up.
Islamic justice is a proud institution, one to which more than a billion people subscribe, at least in theory, and in the heart of the Islamic world it is the law of the land. But take a look at the verse above: more compelling even than the order to flog adulterers is the command that the believer show no compassion. It is this order to choose Allah above his sense of conscience and compassion that imprisons the Muslim in a mindset that is archaic and extreme.
If moderate Muslims believe there should be no compassion shown to the girl from Qatif, then what exactly makes them so moderate?
When a “moderate” Muslim’s sense of compassion and conscience collides with matters prescribed by Allah, he should choose compassion. Unless that happens much more widely, a moderate Islam will remain wishful thinking.
Ayaan Hirsi Ali, a former member of the Dutch Parliament and a resident scholar at the American Enterprise Institute, is the author of “Infidel.”
Thursday, December 06, 2007
Visa Announces Shop Only - "Shop Till You Drop" Card
Want to get that "shopper's high" without actually spending a dime?
Get that special rush of Dopamine surging into your brain as you mainstream consumer consumption ?
Feel that special rush as the retailer swipes and bags your 'Junk" like a heroin addict in a shooting gallery?
Well with Visa's "Shop Till You Drop" card you just pay a small fee --ten thousand dollars worth of "buy only" credits cost a paltry fifty bucks (and you can get up to one -hundred thousand dollars credits for about three hundred dollars) with high interest easy credit terms of course.
So shop away! - You check out the goods just like you were actually buying them -- the clerk says thank you - and you leave without the merchandise, but aglow with that "special shoppers high" that really has nothing to do with needing or even wanting most of "the stuff" anyway.
And for a small extra fee the clerk will provide you with an assortment of boxes with the details of what you "shopped" so you can arrive at home and go over all your "shopped only purchases" with your family and even wrap and put them under the tree if you like. (and then you get another "fix" for free when you open them.)
And -- you can give these "Shopped Only"gifts for any and all occasions - "Oh look what the Nelson's "Shopped" us for our housewarming (your friend unwraps and reads the gift description ) - "A beautiful Tiffany bowl".
And the whole nature of consumerism will change - and life as we know it - and the social and political and economic and cultural impact will be staggering!
Remember - it's "The thought that counts" - so get your Visa "Shop Till You Drop" card -- get high - and change the world! --For peanuts!
Get that special rush of Dopamine surging into your brain as you mainstream consumer consumption ?
Feel that special rush as the retailer swipes and bags your 'Junk" like a heroin addict in a shooting gallery?
Well with Visa's "Shop Till You Drop" card you just pay a small fee --ten thousand dollars worth of "buy only" credits cost a paltry fifty bucks (and you can get up to one -hundred thousand dollars credits for about three hundred dollars) with high interest easy credit terms of course.
So shop away! - You check out the goods just like you were actually buying them -- the clerk says thank you - and you leave without the merchandise, but aglow with that "special shoppers high" that really has nothing to do with needing or even wanting most of "the stuff" anyway.
And for a small extra fee the clerk will provide you with an assortment of boxes with the details of what you "shopped" so you can arrive at home and go over all your "shopped only purchases" with your family and even wrap and put them under the tree if you like. (and then you get another "fix" for free when you open them.)
And -- you can give these "Shopped Only"gifts for any and all occasions - "Oh look what the Nelson's "Shopped" us for our housewarming (your friend unwraps and reads the gift description ) - "A beautiful Tiffany bowl".
And the whole nature of consumerism will change - and life as we know it - and the social and political and economic and cultural impact will be staggering!
Remember - it's "The thought that counts" - so get your Visa "Shop Till You Drop" card -- get high - and change the world! --For peanuts!
Monday, December 03, 2007
The World's Women Need A "Thelma and Louse" Reaction
In Saudi Arabia, a woman who was gang-raped was sentenced to 90 lashes. The reason? Before the rape, the woman, who was then 19, had been in a car with a man who was not a family member — a crime under the kingdom’s legal code, which is based on a strict Wahabi reading of Islamic law. Punishing the victim of a brutal rape is reprehensible. Then a Saudi appeals court more than doubled her lashings to 200 and added six months’ jail time, apparently because she had the audacity to publicly challenge the court’s ruling. Her lawyer had his license to practice suspended.
Any woman who is not sufficiently outraged to start a world wide revolution over the way most Muslim's treat women -- should immediately have her tubes tied!
Boycotts -- political activism -- withholding pussy favors from men and even male castration are what may be necessary to stop the oppression of tens of millions of totally innocent and vulnerable women from these sick fucks who go to the Mosque four times a day and then come home and kick their wives around in front of their children.
Look - the world's men aren't doing (and won't do) shit to help you! They're out fucking younger women and drinking in sports bars and would rather be hunting and fishing and even working - than getting involved in stopping women from getting lashed in Saudi Arabia.
Hell - it's not long ago that they were burning scarlett letters onto womens tits for crimes that they commited with young boys before breakfast every day - and if it wasn't for some really brave sisters you still wouldn't have suffrage ( let alone the pill and a job).
So until you turn up the heat - use your bigger brains and stronger wills and turn into a world wide army of "Thelma and Louise's" -- poor pathetic gals like that one in Saudi Arabia are going to keep getting ruined by subhuman male scumbags.
Go get em -- here's a rallying cry "No Support - No Vote and No Pussy"
Any woman who is not sufficiently outraged to start a world wide revolution over the way most Muslim's treat women -- should immediately have her tubes tied!
Boycotts -- political activism -- withholding pussy favors from men and even male castration are what may be necessary to stop the oppression of tens of millions of totally innocent and vulnerable women from these sick fucks who go to the Mosque four times a day and then come home and kick their wives around in front of their children.
Look - the world's men aren't doing (and won't do) shit to help you! They're out fucking younger women and drinking in sports bars and would rather be hunting and fishing and even working - than getting involved in stopping women from getting lashed in Saudi Arabia.
Hell - it's not long ago that they were burning scarlett letters onto womens tits for crimes that they commited with young boys before breakfast every day - and if it wasn't for some really brave sisters you still wouldn't have suffrage ( let alone the pill and a job).
So until you turn up the heat - use your bigger brains and stronger wills and turn into a world wide army of "Thelma and Louise's" -- poor pathetic gals like that one in Saudi Arabia are going to keep getting ruined by subhuman male scumbags.
Go get em -- here's a rallying cry "No Support - No Vote and No Pussy"
Sunday, December 02, 2007
Bill Richardson Just Loves To Kill Animals
Yep -this cherubic presidential candidate who likes to come across as an avuncular mix of Will Rogers and Mark Twain, when he's in a national TV debate -- just loves to tell his downhome redneck audiences that he is the only presidential candidate who loves to hunt and is a card carrying member of the NRA.
He's your chubby uncle Billie when he's on the national stage -- but out there in shit-for brains-land he reverts to his gun totin animal killin nature.
I was hoping that some pimply faced You Tuber would have asked him; "Hey Bill - why do you get so stoked on shooting some beautiful wild creature with a high powered rifle -- clearly you haven't missed any meals lately - is it that short dick complex thing?"
Well, i can think of a lot of things that the world could use right now -- but another asshole who likes to sit in his den oiling up his Winchester whilst dreaming of a high caliber slug ripping it's way into some animal nibbling on some berries - ain't one of them.
Actually -- i would like to see Bill Richardson's asshole impaled on the horns of an Antelope out there in New Mexico - where God willing he will remain.
He's your chubby uncle Billie when he's on the national stage -- but out there in shit-for brains-land he reverts to his gun totin animal killin nature.
I was hoping that some pimply faced You Tuber would have asked him; "Hey Bill - why do you get so stoked on shooting some beautiful wild creature with a high powered rifle -- clearly you haven't missed any meals lately - is it that short dick complex thing?"
Well, i can think of a lot of things that the world could use right now -- but another asshole who likes to sit in his den oiling up his Winchester whilst dreaming of a high caliber slug ripping it's way into some animal nibbling on some berries - ain't one of them.
Actually -- i would like to see Bill Richardson's asshole impaled on the horns of an Antelope out there in New Mexico - where God willing he will remain.
Friday, November 30, 2007
Muhammad Is NO Teddy Bear!
KHARTOUM, Sudan - Thousands of Sudanese, many armed with clubs and knives, rallied Friday in a central square and demanded the execution of a British teacher convicted of insulting Islam for allowing her students to name a teddy bear "Muhammad."
Now - nothing could more vividly demonstrate what the Civilized world is up against more than this frightening demonstration of Religious faith gone totally wacko!
Illiterate angry masses of exploited human animals brought to a frenzy of hatred by psycho religious leaders is business as usual in the history of the human ape . The problem now, however, is that instead of stones they have modern weapons including weapons of mass destruction.
Now you don't see any riots in Sudan over Dar fur where cutting off a child's arms is what you do before lunch and then you go out and burn a village and torture and rape some folks and then take a long nap.
These folks are very faithful though. They are so faithful that ninety percent of them can't read or write so they don't even know what the Koran means - they just chant away and listen to their Mullahs demented interpretations of it. They would believe Mohammad WAS a Teddy Bear if that's what they were told -- and then they would try to hack you to death for calling him a "Great Spiritual Leader"
All the Imams would have to scream is"Kill the infidel! -she called Mohammad a great spiritual leader! --Cut out her pussy and drag it through the streets ! --let the children see the torn pussy of the Infidel who called Mohammad "A Great Spiritual Leader".
Well at least it's all very clear now (in case it wasn't before) -in America we buy Teddy Bears for our kids for Christmas -- but the Muslims would cut out your intestines at the thought that someone could portray Mohammad as cute and adorable and fuzzy.
Can you imagine, even one of Christianity's major wackos, like John Hagee, screaming; "Kill all the Jews - Moyshe Pipick, an orthodox Rabbi had a stuffed Sea Otter named Jesus in his Talmud class."
And then the Christians taking to the streets like animals with torches and pitch forks hunting down and killing Jews? -- Heck, they stopped doing that sixty years ago.
Why doesn't some smart toy maker come out with next years hot item for Ramadan? -- An ignorant vicious Muslim moron doll with a suicide belt - and with a sword and a Barbie with a detachable head for the kids to practice cutting off.
I only want ten percent for this great marketing concept -- Sent to my bank care of Sal man Rushdie.
Oh -and I'm gonna have to switch,sadly, to Rudy for president - one good wacko deserves another.
Now - nothing could more vividly demonstrate what the Civilized world is up against more than this frightening demonstration of Religious faith gone totally wacko!
Illiterate angry masses of exploited human animals brought to a frenzy of hatred by psycho religious leaders is business as usual in the history of the human ape . The problem now, however, is that instead of stones they have modern weapons including weapons of mass destruction.
Now you don't see any riots in Sudan over Dar fur where cutting off a child's arms is what you do before lunch and then you go out and burn a village and torture and rape some folks and then take a long nap.
These folks are very faithful though. They are so faithful that ninety percent of them can't read or write so they don't even know what the Koran means - they just chant away and listen to their Mullahs demented interpretations of it. They would believe Mohammad WAS a Teddy Bear if that's what they were told -- and then they would try to hack you to death for calling him a "Great Spiritual Leader"
All the Imams would have to scream is"Kill the infidel! -she called Mohammad a great spiritual leader! --Cut out her pussy and drag it through the streets ! --let the children see the torn pussy of the Infidel who called Mohammad "A Great Spiritual Leader".
Well at least it's all very clear now (in case it wasn't before) -in America we buy Teddy Bears for our kids for Christmas -- but the Muslims would cut out your intestines at the thought that someone could portray Mohammad as cute and adorable and fuzzy.
Can you imagine, even one of Christianity's major wackos, like John Hagee, screaming; "Kill all the Jews - Moyshe Pipick, an orthodox Rabbi had a stuffed Sea Otter named Jesus in his Talmud class."
And then the Christians taking to the streets like animals with torches and pitch forks hunting down and killing Jews? -- Heck, they stopped doing that sixty years ago.
Why doesn't some smart toy maker come out with next years hot item for Ramadan? -- An ignorant vicious Muslim moron doll with a suicide belt - and with a sword and a Barbie with a detachable head for the kids to practice cutting off.
I only want ten percent for this great marketing concept -- Sent to my bank care of Sal man Rushdie.
Oh -and I'm gonna have to switch,sadly, to Rudy for president - one good wacko deserves another.
Britney Spears Endorses Mitt Romney "The Mormon Moose" For President
Britney Spears has finally made her long awaited decision about who she thinks should become president and has announced her support for Republican candidate (and Mormon) -- Mitt Romney (former governor of Massachusetts).
"This was a very difficult decision for me", said Britney, as she lounged by her pool in Miami waiting for her plastic surgeon to arrive and repair her right nipple which had fallen off overnight (the result of twelve breast implants).
"The Moron -oops Mormon thing worried me at first but when i found out that they believe in having many wives (at the same time) i figured that they must really know how to take care of a woman -- and i need a lot of care."
"Also - he's such a stud puppy -so tall and handsome and still has got that 'daddy spank me' thing going for him --and now that he's against abortions i really am convinced he's the one because i've had twenty eight abortions now and believe you me that gets real old after a while."
She continued,"Also, i think it's sooo cool that he puts his dog in a cage on the top of his car when his family goes on a trip. My mom and dad used to tie me to the roof of the car when i was little,whenever we went on a road trip -- and sometimes they would even leave me out overnight --it was sooo cool --and made me feel soooo secure."
"I'm kinda disappointed that i couldn't get Michael (Jackson) to come out for Mitt but ever since he saw Rudy Giuliani in a dress on SNL he just loves Rudy - although he thinks his wife is a real cunt, so maybe i can turn him around."(oops a pun)
"Well -anyhow - i plan on working real hard for Mitt - and hope maybe he'll get a little hard for me - haha -- he sure is a tall sexy hunk --i bet he's hung like a Moose -- ha ha --a Mormon Moose!"
Stay tuned for more of the bandit's celebrity endorsements -- because every vote counts!
"This was a very difficult decision for me", said Britney, as she lounged by her pool in Miami waiting for her plastic surgeon to arrive and repair her right nipple which had fallen off overnight (the result of twelve breast implants).
"The Moron -oops Mormon thing worried me at first but when i found out that they believe in having many wives (at the same time) i figured that they must really know how to take care of a woman -- and i need a lot of care."
"Also - he's such a stud puppy -so tall and handsome and still has got that 'daddy spank me' thing going for him --and now that he's against abortions i really am convinced he's the one because i've had twenty eight abortions now and believe you me that gets real old after a while."
She continued,"Also, i think it's sooo cool that he puts his dog in a cage on the top of his car when his family goes on a trip. My mom and dad used to tie me to the roof of the car when i was little,whenever we went on a road trip -- and sometimes they would even leave me out overnight --it was sooo cool --and made me feel soooo secure."
"I'm kinda disappointed that i couldn't get Michael (Jackson) to come out for Mitt but ever since he saw Rudy Giuliani in a dress on SNL he just loves Rudy - although he thinks his wife is a real cunt, so maybe i can turn him around."(oops a pun)
"Well -anyhow - i plan on working real hard for Mitt - and hope maybe he'll get a little hard for me - haha -- he sure is a tall sexy hunk --i bet he's hung like a Moose -- ha ha --a Mormon Moose!"
Stay tuned for more of the bandit's celebrity endorsements -- because every vote counts!
Thursday, November 29, 2007
Answer These Questions If You've Got The Grapes
"Asking the important questions — not
So CNN chose which questions would be asked in the Republican debate last night. And guess what: not one question about health care, the central domestic issue for this election.
They did, however, include a question about putting a man on Mars"
So said the NYTimes -- So i guess I'll just have to submit another list of the Digibandit's key questions -and judging from your reactions to my prior blog on this subject -- i really struck a chord with my tens of thousands of loyal and bright readers -- so here's round two:
What is the most critical issue that you have ever changed your mind about after careful deliberation? (elaborate)
If you found your adult son or daughter performing oral sex on a minor what would you do?
If you were assassinated during your Presidency would you want your wife to remarry?
Have you ever been intimate with a minority (including a Jew)?
Do you believe that killing over two-hundred thousand Iraqi civilians and displacing four million was justified in a moral, means /ends equation?
How many times in the past month did you have sex (from all sources)?
Do you think that Allah is on an equally Godly footing with Yaweh? (Buddha? - Krishna? -- The Tooth Fairy?)
What is your favorite charity?
If your wife or daughter were gang raped by Hasidic Jews would you allow them to have an abortion? (by Blacks? - Hispanics?)
Do you believe that vibrators can be an effective source of sexual stimulation? (does the Mrs. indulge?)
Has a minority ever been a guest in your home (who and when?)
Have you ever killed a wild animal? (why?)
Are any of your children taking prescription anti-depressants?
Do you believe that Ahmadinejad is a normal human being? (Hugo Chavez?)
More to come!
So CNN chose which questions would be asked in the Republican debate last night. And guess what: not one question about health care, the central domestic issue for this election.
They did, however, include a question about putting a man on Mars"
So said the NYTimes -- So i guess I'll just have to submit another list of the Digibandit's key questions -and judging from your reactions to my prior blog on this subject -- i really struck a chord with my tens of thousands of loyal and bright readers -- so here's round two:
What is the most critical issue that you have ever changed your mind about after careful deliberation? (elaborate)
If you found your adult son or daughter performing oral sex on a minor what would you do?
If you were assassinated during your Presidency would you want your wife to remarry?
Have you ever been intimate with a minority (including a Jew)?
Do you believe that killing over two-hundred thousand Iraqi civilians and displacing four million was justified in a moral, means /ends equation?
How many times in the past month did you have sex (from all sources)?
Do you think that Allah is on an equally Godly footing with Yaweh? (Buddha? - Krishna? -- The Tooth Fairy?)
What is your favorite charity?
If your wife or daughter were gang raped by Hasidic Jews would you allow them to have an abortion? (by Blacks? - Hispanics?)
Do you believe that vibrators can be an effective source of sexual stimulation? (does the Mrs. indulge?)
Has a minority ever been a guest in your home (who and when?)
Have you ever killed a wild animal? (why?)
Are any of your children taking prescription anti-depressants?
Do you believe that Ahmadinejad is a normal human being? (Hugo Chavez?)
More to come!
Wednesday, November 28, 2007
Now -How About Bush Taking Off HIS Uniform - Before It's Too Late
Will someone -- anyone -- tell me why the President of the United States is also the Commander In Chief of the armed forces?
"It's because you gotta have someone at the top who is not part of the Military establishment and someone who has the final say in an emergency" says my fucking idiot brother.
Let me get this straight -- the shit really hits the fan - like George Bush gets a call from some General (think Sterling Hayden in "Dr. Strangelove") -- "Hello Mr. President -we have confirmed satellite reports that Russia has just started fueling it's new MIR SS19 nuclear missiles --could you please toddle over to the war Room?"
Now i can think of a few scenarios i might prefer to empowering a guy with zero knowledge (i mean zero) of military strategy -who gets his best advice from the son of God who resides in heaven -who was formerly on Earth - and who takes a personal interest in his welfare- and will now maybe whisper in his ear "Go destroy civilization - better hurry - and we'll worry about it later."
One alternative might be a standing group of tough - smart - balanced individuals -- pre evaluated and selected and ordained by the Democratic process (with all the evaluation tools brought to bear in the selection process commensurate with the awesome responsibility being delegated) - with the power to evaluate such a crisis in an immediate time frame -- and empowered to act!
Or would you prefer George Bush down on his knees in the White House Chapel --rosary in hand -staring up at a wooden idol - crying "Oh thank you Lord Jesus --thank you so much - i look forward to seeing you in Heaven within the next couple of hours --Laura and the kids say hi -- and yes I'll tell the Jews to convert right away so they won't all be sent to hell with the Russians -- yes --I'll tell John Hagee right away -- oh thank you so much Jesus - oh and hey what's the weather like up there?"
Well -- you get the idea -and if you think it can't happen i would suggest you just keep on shopping right until the end --one more swipe of your last credit card before the you head for the big shopping mall in the sky --Merry Christmas -- adios!
"It's because you gotta have someone at the top who is not part of the Military establishment and someone who has the final say in an emergency" says my fucking idiot brother.
Let me get this straight -- the shit really hits the fan - like George Bush gets a call from some General (think Sterling Hayden in "Dr. Strangelove") -- "Hello Mr. President -we have confirmed satellite reports that Russia has just started fueling it's new MIR SS19 nuclear missiles --could you please toddle over to the war Room?"
Now i can think of a few scenarios i might prefer to empowering a guy with zero knowledge (i mean zero) of military strategy -who gets his best advice from the son of God who resides in heaven -who was formerly on Earth - and who takes a personal interest in his welfare- and will now maybe whisper in his ear "Go destroy civilization - better hurry - and we'll worry about it later."
One alternative might be a standing group of tough - smart - balanced individuals -- pre evaluated and selected and ordained by the Democratic process (with all the evaluation tools brought to bear in the selection process commensurate with the awesome responsibility being delegated) - with the power to evaluate such a crisis in an immediate time frame -- and empowered to act!
Or would you prefer George Bush down on his knees in the White House Chapel --rosary in hand -staring up at a wooden idol - crying "Oh thank you Lord Jesus --thank you so much - i look forward to seeing you in Heaven within the next couple of hours --Laura and the kids say hi -- and yes I'll tell the Jews to convert right away so they won't all be sent to hell with the Russians -- yes --I'll tell John Hagee right away -- oh thank you so much Jesus - oh and hey what's the weather like up there?"
Well -- you get the idea -and if you think it can't happen i would suggest you just keep on shopping right until the end --one more swipe of your last credit card before the you head for the big shopping mall in the sky --Merry Christmas -- adios!
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