Dick and Liz Cheney in Dr. Strangelove Two

A conservative advocacy organization in Washington, Keep America Safe, kicked up a storm last week when it released a video that questioned the loyalty of Justice Department lawyers who worked in the past on behalf of detained terrorism suspects.

There’s something truly bizarre about this,” said Richard A. Epstein, aUniversity of Chicago law professor and a revered figure among many members of the society. “Liz Cheney is a former student of mine — I don’t know what moves her on this thing,” he said.

Ms. Cheney’s video referred to the lawyers as the “Al Qaeda Seven,” and accused the Justice Department of concealing their names, which were later revealed by Fox News. -- On Sunday, Benjamin Wittes, a senior fellow at the Brookings Institution, issued a joint letter criticizing the “shameful series of attacks” on government lawyers, which it said were “unjust to the individuals in question and destructive of any attempt to build lasting mechanisms for counterterrorism adjudications.”The letter was signed by a Who’s Who of former Republican administration officials and conservative legal figures, including Kenneth W. Starr, the former special prosecutor, and Charles D. Stimson, who resigned from the second Bush administration after suggesting that businesses might think twice before hiring law firms that had represented detainees.

While it is heartening to find out that some of the most conservative and prestigious legal think tanks and rabid anti liberal icons have made statements confirming that Liz Cheney has now entered the right wing-nut swampland usually inhabited by Rush "Oxycotin" Limbaugh and his cronies at Fox News:

It is sad to see that a childhood infected by a father who has watched "Dr. Srangelove" too many times and is living the role portrayed by Sterling Hayden as General Jack D. Ripper, a paranoid and an ultra-patriot who believes "The Commies are stealing our precious bodily fluids".and launches a preemptive attack on Russia:

Has turned Liz into not only a very ugly women genetically - but a very ugly character as well.

Why Did God Give John Edwards A Penis?

Or any man for that matter? - And here's the obvious answer:

God has a Weenie!

Yep - knowing full well that any descent normal attractive (or rich) male could and would - hump almost any hot female that walks - until, finally, his last drop of testosterone dribbled out ;

He still proceeded to create men with dicks!

I mean - he could have created - say - a double eye wink as the catalyst for procreation - or a whistle - or a face lick or maybe just a thought - And wham! - She's pregnant! - And on goes the human race. -- But noooo:

He didn't HAVE to create this whole sex/lust/power/ ego/ dominance/cheating - lovey dovey feel good orgasmic stuff to move humanity down the road?

The only reason God did that - and created all this confusion about sin and sex is because -- God was born with a penis!

So - don't blame John Edwards for responding to the uncontrollable urges that were programmed into him by a horny and lascivious omnipotent and mighty creator of the universe - the master and originator of all things horny -THE big guy with the big one eye - Penis in the Sky

Blame GOD - For Sticking A Dick On POOR John Edwards

Iraq Has Come A long Way Baby

Wednesday, January 17, 2007

One Half Hour Ago

White House spokesman Tony Snow announced this morning that the President will not be going to serve in a front line combat unit in Iraq.

To charges from the Democrats that he "turned yellow"--- Mr. Snow responded " Our top Military leaders finally convinced him that if captured and tortured ,the President would give away high level strategic information -- jeapordizing National security.

The President had maintained that being tortured by liberal Democrats for the past six years had prepared him for anything the terrorists could administer.

Ted Kennedy ,speaking for the Democrats said " He doesn't even remember what he had for breakfast let alone any high level intelligence -- he 's just chicken ".

Ball Breaking Endangering National Security

Dr.Moishe Pipick -head biologist at The World

Biology Research Institute in Berne,Switzerland -announced today

":The size of male Gonads (balls) has been shrinking steadily in the major world democracies -especially in the USA - for two decades -and the diminished testosterone levels in men is now at a critical level"

Elise Mandelbaum -digibandit heal thand science editor asked Dr. Pipick" What are the main causes of the Gonad shrinkage?

"First and foremost it is the increasing aggression in female behavior which is reversing Darwinian protocals in male development - and the commensurrate insecurity among men about their historical genealogical roles."

"So in plain English Doctor Pipick?" said Mandelbaum.

He replied; "Men are losing their balls because of female intimidation -nagging and general ball breaking behavior"

"And how does this impact on our national security in the USA?"

DR. Pipick responded; "Well -for one thing the military -and especially at the fighting man level is becoming less dynamic -especially when facing an enemy like the fascist muslims who have no concept of taking ANY crapola from a woman"

He continued; "Our studies show that Arab men have gonads that are .567 centimeters larger than an American male -which translates into an 18 percent testosterone advantage"

"In simple terms - modern women are squeazing the grape (ball) juice out of modern men -and turning them into fucking wimps!"

Mandelbaum replied: "Iv'e noticed that with my husband Manny -is there any thing we women can do?".

Pipick answered "Stop breaking balls and nagging and acting cunty"

Blacks Are Too Lazy To Farm

Monday, March 01, 2010

Why Can't American Drug Gangs Do This?

SEQUOIA NATIONAL FOREST, Calif. – Not far from Yosemite's waterfalls and in the middle of California's redwood forests, Mexican drug gangs are quietly commandeering U.S. public land to grow millions of marijuana plants and using smuggled immigrants to cultivate them.

Pot has been grown on public lands for decades, but Mexican traffickers have taken it to a whole new level: using armed guards and trip wires to safeguard sprawling plots that in some cases contain tens of thousands of plants offering a potential yield of more than 30 tons of pot a year.

"Just like the Mexicans took over the methamphetamine trade, they've gone to mega, monster gardens," said Brent Wood, a supervisor for the California Department of Justice's Bureau of Narcotics Enforcement. He said Mexican traffickers have "supersized" the marijuana trade.

Interviews conducted by The Associated Press with law enforcement officials across the country showed that Mexican gangs are largely responsible for a spike in large-scale marijuana farms over the last several years.

Local, state and federal agents found about a million more pot plants each year between 2004 and 2008, and authorities say an estimated 75 percent to 90 percent of the new marijuana farms can be linked to Mexican gangs.

In 2008 alone, according to the Drug Enforcement Administration, police across the country confiscated or destroyed 7.6 million plants from about 20,000 outdoor plots.

Growing marijuana in the U.S. saves traffickers the risk and expense of smuggling their product across the border and allows gangs to produce their crops closer to local markets.

Distribution also becomes less risky. Once the marijuana is harvested and dried on the hidden farms, drug gangs can drive it to major cities, where it is distributed to street dealers and sold along with pot that was grown in Mexico.

About the only risk to the Mexican growers, experts say, is that a stray hiker or hunter could stumble onto a hidden field.

The remote plots are nestled under the cover of thick forest canopies in places such as Sequoia National Park, or hidden high in the rugged-yet-fertile Sierra Nevada Mountains. Others are secretly planted on remote stretches of Texas ranch land.

All of the sites are far from the eyes of law enforcement, where growers can take the time needed to grow far more potent marijuana. Farmers of these fields use illegal fertilizers to help the plants along, and use cloned female plants to reduce the amount of seed in the bud that is dried and eventually sold.

Mexican gang plots can often be distinguished from those of domestic-based growers, who usually cultivate much smaller fields with perhaps 100 plants and no security measures.

Some of the fields tied to the drug gangs have as many as 75,000 plants, each of which can yield at least a pound of pot annually, according to federal data reviewed by the AP.

The Sequoia National Forest in central California is covered in a patchwork of pot fields, most of which are hidden along mountain creeks and streams, far from hiking trails. It's the same situation in the nearbyYosemite, Sequoia and Redwood national parks.

Even if they had the manpower to police the vast wilderness, authorities say terrain and weather conditions often keep them from finding the farms, except accidentally.

Many of the plots are encircled with crude explosives and are patrolled by guards armed with AK-47s who survey the perimeter from the ground and from perches high in the trees.

The farms are growing in sophistication and are increasingly cultivated by illegal immigrants, many of whom have been brought to the U.S. from Michoacan.

Growers once slept among their plants, but many of them now have campsites up to a mile away equipped with separate living and cooking areas.

"It's amazing how they have changed the way they do business," Wood said. "It's their domain."

Drug gangs have also imported marijuana experts and unskilled labor to help find the best land or buildirrigation systems, Wood said.

Finally -Tiger Got His Nuts Back

To all my golfing buddies

To my wife, I'm sorry. I fucked up but I'm not changing so you'll either
need to put up with this shit or I'll stroke you the check I agreed to in
the pre-nup....sorry.

To my fans, get over it. Where I stick my dick is none of your business. If
you care....sorry. I don't need any of you in order to make 10 times in one
year what you'll make in a career. I promise to continue to hit 4 irons from
210 yards to within 10' of the hole and drop putts that you couldn't read in
a million years. If that's not good enough for you, go watch tennis.

To the media. You cocksuckers are the only ones more two-faced than I am.
Kissing my ass for all those years and then ripping me every chance you've
had since Thanksgiving. Fuck all ya'll. I'm glad I don't have to take the
time to sit and answer the same bullshit questions over and over again.

To the other golfers. Kiss my cablanasian ass! You motherfuckers come out
ripping me when I've put more fucking money in your pockets than you could
count. You think anyone's been paying to see Jesper-fucking-Parnavik? Give
me a fucking break. I'm almost tempted to give up golf just to punish you
guys but I think it's going to be more fun to practice for the next few
weeks and get back to making you all my bitches.

That's all I got today folks.....see ya at Augusta !....Oh and Bambi, if
you're listening I'll meet you at the Ritz in 45 minutes.

Why Can't American Drug Gangs Do This?

SEQUOIA NATIONAL FOREST, Calif. – Not far from Yosemite's waterfalls and in the middle of California's redwood forests, Mexican drug gangs are quietly commandeering U.S. public land to grow millions of marijuana plants and using smuggled immigrants to cultivate them.

Pot has been grown on public lands for decades, but Mexican traffickers have taken it to a whole new level: using armed guards and trip wires to safeguard sprawling plots that in some cases contain tens of thousands of plants offering a potential yield of more than 30 tons of pot a year.

"Just like the Mexicans took over the methamphetamine trade, they've gone to mega, monster gardens," said Brent Wood, a supervisor for the California Department of Justice's Bureau of Narcotics Enforcement. He said Mexican traffickers have "supersized" the marijuana trade.

Interviews conducted by The Associated Press with law enforcement officials across the country showed that Mexican gangs are largely responsible for a spike in large-scale marijuana farms over the last several years.

Local, state and federal agents found about a million more pot plants each year between 2004 and 2008, and authorities say an estimated 75 percent to 90 percent of the new marijuana farms can be linked to Mexican gangs.

In 2008 alone, according to the Drug Enforcement Administration, police across the country confiscated or destroyed 7.6 million plants from about 20,000 outdoor plots.

Growing marijuana in the U.S. saves traffickers the risk and expense of smuggling their product across the border and allows gangs to produce their crops closer to local markets.

Distribution also becomes less risky. Once the marijuana is harvested and dried on the hidden farms, drug gangs can drive it to major cities, where it is distributed to street dealers and sold along with pot that was grown in Mexico.

About the only risk to the Mexican growers, experts say, is that a stray hiker or hunter could stumble onto a hidden field.

The remote plots are nestled under the cover of thick forest canopies in places such as Sequoia National Park, or hidden high in the rugged-yet-fertile Sierra Nevada Mountains. Others are secretly planted on remote stretches of Texas ranch land.

All of the sites are far from the eyes of law enforcement, where growers can take the time needed to grow far more potent marijuana. Farmers of these fields use illegal fertilizers to help the plants along, and use cloned female plants to reduce the amount of seed in the bud that is dried and eventually sold.

Mexican gang plots can often be distinguished from those of domestic-based growers, who usually cultivate much smaller fields with perhaps 100 plants and no security measures.

Some of the fields tied to the drug gangs have as many as 75,000 plants, each of which can yield at least a pound of pot annually, according to federal data reviewed by the AP.

The Sequoia National Forest in central California is covered in a patchwork of pot fields, most of which are hidden along mountain creeks and streams, far from hiking trails. It's the same situation in the nearbyYosemite, Sequoia and Redwood national parks.

Even if they had the manpower to police the vast wilderness, authorities say terrain and weather conditions often keep them from finding the farms, except accidentally.

Many of the plots are encircled with crude explosives and are patrolled by guards armed with AK-47s who survey the perimeter from the ground and from perches high in the trees.

The farms are growing in sophistication and are increasingly cultivated by illegal immigrants, many of whom have been brought to the U.S. from Michoacan.

Growers once slept among their plants, but many of them now have campsites up to a mile away equipped with separate living and cooking areas.

"It's amazing how they have changed the way they do business," Wood said. "It's their domain."

Drug gangs have also imported marijuana experts and unskilled labor to help find the best land or buildirrigation systems, Wood said.

Dysfunctional Repressed Homo's Guided By Psychotic Mullahs -

The perfect raw material for molding a sick young Muslim into a death machine!

-From NY Times -- A Pakistani military psychiatrist is trying to answer that question. In a study of 24 young men who were involved in terrorist attacks in Pakistan, the psychiatrist, Brig. Mowadat Hussain Rana, has found that they tend to be the younger or middle siblings in families of six or more children. The households are not always poor but are often violent, and the youngsters get lost in the chaos.

“He’s that boy who is not in a rigorous system of rule setting,” Brigadier Rana said in an interview in Rawalpindi. “He becomes someone who drifts, who spends afternoons hitting stray dogs, and no one notices.”

His parents, at their wits’ end, take him to a mullah, hoping to instill discipline, the theory goes. The two develop a close relationship, sometimes even sexual, giving the boy the attention he has long craved. The mullah then introduces him to others, men who make him feel important, as if he is part of something bigger than himself.

-A bit of History - In Persia homosexuality and homoerotic expressions were tolerated in numerous public places, from monasteries and seminaries to taverns, military camps, bathhouses, and coffee houses. In the earlySafavid era (1501–1723), male houses of prostitution (amrad khane) were legally recognized and paid taxes. Persian poets, such as Sa’di (d. 1291), Hafez (d. 1389), and Jami (d. 1492), wrote poems replete with homoerotic allusions. The two most commonly documented forms were commercial sex with transgender young males or males enacting transgender roles exemplified by the köçeks and thebacchás, and Sufi spiritual practices in which the practitioner admired the form of a beautiful boy in order to enter ecstatic states and glimpse the beauty of god.

Today, governments in the Middle East often ignore, deny the existence of, or criminalize homosexuality.

Iranian President Mahmoud Ahmadinejad, during his 2007 speech at Columbia University, asserted that there were no gay people in Iran.(don't exist -like the Holocaust didn't)Gay people do live in Iran, but most keep their sexuality a secret for fear of government sanction or rejection by their families.^[149]

^{So - A -We see why the Mullah's have no problem turning out human death machines}

^{AND B -Why we can not allow Nuclear Weapons access to a bunch of insane - repressed homosexuals - who believe that killing us will send them to Paradise. --DUH!}

China Has Sabatoged Toyota -Kia is Next!

Japan's leadership with the full backing of the general population has demanded that Toyota's entire board of directors -including President Ichy Toyota - commit Hari kari in the ancient Samurai tradition of maintaining complete honor in the face of defeat or disgrace -By cutting their bowels open -and then being mercifully beheaded with a Samurai sword by a trusted assistant.

'The Toyota leadership has fucked up the reputation of a great National symbol and provider of wealth and sustinence to the Nation and they have completely fucked up the handling of the whole mess!" said Inguchi Tushymoto Japan's Prime Minister.

"Only cleansing by the ultimate and heroic Samurai tradition can restore faith in Toyota among our Foreign markets - and among the Japanese people"

A poll released early today from the Pew National Research Institute showed that 83% of Americans would respond favorably towards Toyota if the board of directors killed themselves.

But Moishe Pipick president of thje National Auto safety Conference announced today:

"Early this morning Mrs. Rachel Ginsberg of Sioux Crap falls , North Dakota was driving along with her five children and the steering wheel of her brand new Toyota Land Cruiser came off in her hands -She was saved by a herd of Bison grazing alongside the highway who cushioned the crash impact"

Pipick continued; "There is growing evidence that Toyota vehicles are literally "falling apart" slowly but surely -and those Japs can start commiting suicide wholesale -but it ain;t gonna work"

Arnold Goldblum an expert in automotive engineering and corporate espionage said today; "Hey -wake the fuck up everybody -This is the Chinks sabatoging the Japs as they prepare to launch their new automotive lines - and dominate the industry -and hurt the Japs who they hate!"

He concluded; "And the Chinks hate the Gooks (aka Koreans) more than the Japs so if i were driving a Kia right now? -I wouldn't! They are next"

Wow! -thank God we owe them our shirts! Other wise we couldn't drive a Caddy without the wheels falling off.

Hey - China IS the future -there's no stopping them -AND soon -speaking of shirts - there will even be AMERICAN laundries - " Hey Johnny - go take the laundry down to the Jews"

That's where I draw the line!

St. Paul -Distant Relative Of Rue Paul

Ever wonder why archtetypes in western thought like - Eve, Sarah, Hagar, Esther -Heroic Jewish women of the old testament - have no similar role models in the Christian Bible?

Well -let's look at Gay Paul ( ancient relative of Rue Paul)

"The war that went on between what he desired with his mind and what he desired with his body, his drivenness to a legalistic religion of control, his fear when that system was threatened, his attitude toward women, his refusal to seek marriage as an outlet for his passion -- nothing else accounts for this data as well as the possibility that Paul was gay."

"To me it is a beautiful idea that a homosexual male, scorned then as well as now, living with both the self-judgment and the social judgments that a fearful society has so often and unknowingly pronounced upon the very being of some of its citizens, could nonetheless, not in spite of this but because of this, be the one who would define grace for the Christian people. Grace was the love of God, an unconditional love, that loved Paul just as he was. A rigidly controlled gay male, I believe, taught the Christian church what the love of God means and what, therefore, Christ means as God's agent. Finally, it was a gay male, tortured and rejected, who came to understand what resurrection means as God's vindicating act."

-- Michael Grant
St. Paul, 1967
Charles Scribners Sons

Hey -Check out these revelations

The New Testament Church—The Role of Women

By: Bob Deffinbaugh

1 Corinthians 11:3-10 But I want you to understand that Christ is the head of every man, and the man is the head of a woman, and God is the head of Christ. 4 Every man who has something on his head while praying or prophesying, disgraces his head. 5 But every woman who has her head uncovered while praying or prophesying, disgraces her head; for she is one and the same with her whose head is shaved. 6 For if a woman does not cover her head, let her also have her hair cut off; but if it is disgraceful for a woman to have her hair cut off or her head shaved, let her cover her head. 7 For a man ought not to have his head covered, since he is the image and glory of God; but the woman is the glory of man. 8 For man does not originate from woman, but woman from man; 9 for indeed man was not created for the woman’s sake, but woman for the man’s sake. 10 Therefore the woman ought to have a symbol of authority on her head, because of the angels.

1 Corinthians 14:33-35 for God is not a God of confusion but of peace, as in all the churches of the saints. 34 Let the women keep silent in the churches; for they are not permitted to speak, but let them subject themselves, just as the Law also says. 35 And if they desire to learn anything, let them ask their own husbands at home; for it is improper for a woman to speak in church.

1 Timothy 5:10 having a reputation for good works; and if she has brought up children, if she has shown hospitality to strangers, if she has washed the saints’ feet, if she has assisted those in distress, and if she has devoted herself to every good work.

Titus 2:3-5 Older women likewise are to be reverent in their behavior, not malicious gossips, nor enslaved to much wine, teaching what is good, 4 that they may encourage the young women to love their husbands, to love their children, 5 to be sensible, pure, workers at home, kind, being subject to their own husbands, that the word of God may not be dishonored.

See also 1 Timothy 2:9-15, Romans 16:1-6 and Luke 8:1-3.

On the 455th anniversary of Martin Luther’s posting his 95 theses on the church door in Wittenburg, a group of women posted on the doors of 12 Los Angeles churches theses intended to bring the contemporary women’s liberation movement into the life of the Church. Their statement repudiated what they called the primitive thinking of theGay Apostle Paul

Don'T ask -Don't Tell!

No Nukes BECAUSE You Are NUTS!

It's as simple as that -and everyone knows that's the real reason we can't let these death worshipers have WMD -But no one wants to say to the Ayatollah:

'Excuse me sir -YOU can't wait to die - it will be a huge improvement over your life - So dontch'a see why we who love LIFE would be a bit concerned about you religious fanaticks having nuclear bombs. -and with your kinda bad attitude toward us Infidels?"

"I mean - we would NEVER let the Pope have nuclear weapons -and they don't want to die quite as much as you guys because at least they drink wine and fuck kids for some fun"

"I mean - you don't get high -you don't laugh - you don't eat pussy - you don't like art or any kind of creativity - you don't like dancing or music - I Mean -What the fuck!?"

"Why don't you just pass one of your many revisions of the real Koran which would allow you to fucking kill yourselves -AND jump feet first into that big pool full of Virgins WITHOUT mustaches? - And then eat some nice clean pussy and some fresh fruit and take a nice dump and wipe WITH Charmin instead of your sandy hand."

"There's GOTTA be Charmin up there wherever you all go -and even Fibrecom to relieve your horrible gas from a lifetime of eating stale figs and shit. - Imagine! -No more constipation!"

'It will be better than you even think it will be - i hear they will even let you have Chinks up there - Some nice pork fried rice and spareribs!"

"Oh and i hear that Allah and Mohammad have a special place for bigshots like you Ayatollah's and Caliphs and suicide bombers of course! - Where you can fuck guys and goats and even do some gambling -and get loaded -and just let it ALL hang out!"

"So - forget the nuclear weapons - Just fucking kill yourselves - just do it - Don't think about it - Do It!"

"And let us get on with our fun loving fucked up lives for as long as we can - and hey -take heart -soon we'll all be dead! "

" Maybe you'll let us use the pool and tennis courts?"

What About All The Dogs Left Behind?

On Christ the Solid Rock I stand, All other ground is sinking sand...

"About the time of the end, a body of men will be raised up, who will turn their attention to the prophecies, in the midst of much clamor and opposition." - Sir Isaac Newton

"I will take you from the nations, gather you from all the lands, and bring you into your own land." Ezekiel 36:24

When you see Jerusalem being surrounded by armies, you will know that its desolation is near. (Luke 21:20)

Nation will rise against nation, and kingdom againstkingdom. (Luke 21:10)

There will be great earthquakes, famines and pestilences in various places, and fearful events and great signs from heaven. (Luke 21:11)

On the earth, nations will be in anguish and perplexity at the roaring and tossing of the sea. (Luke 21:25)

There will be signs in the sun, moon and stars. (Luke 21:25)

Men will faint from terror, apprehensive of what is coming on the world, for the heavenly bodies will be shaken. (Luke 21:26)

When you see these things happening, you know that the kingdom of God is near. (Luke 21:31)

'Call to Me and I will answer you, and I will tell you great and mighty things, which you do not know.' Jeremiah 33:3

Let not your heart be troubled; you believe in God, believe also in Me. In My Father’s house are many mansions; if it were not so, I would have told you. I go to prepare a place for you. And if I go and prepare a place for you, I will come again and receive you to Myself; that where I am, there you may be also. (John 14:1-3)

Abdul Ghari Baradar vs. Mrs. Mandelbaum

Agent Lance Himmler - an experienced CIA torturer - has divulged his initial experience with a revolutionary new torture technique - "American Wife Nagging".

He reported on the method yesterday - at a briefing of the Joint Chiefs of Staff - which the President and Secretrary of Defense Gates attended.


"Sustained nagging by an American wife - preferably a miserable Jewish housewife (hey and no anti-semitism intended - some of my best friends in the CIA have been driven nuts by nagging waspy wives) - is the most effective torture application that i have witnessed in my thirty years of trying to crack the toughest terrorist nuts around the world!"



He recounted; "Well -- we had this Al Quaeda leader who was sitting on some highly sensitive intel - and he would not give an inch! - We waterboarded him - we crushed his toes with a hammer - we put a pigs snout up his butt ( you know they hate pork) - we lit up his nuts with electrical charges - we put sulphuric acid on his left eyeball -- and then we got rough with this guy -- and NOTHING - he spit at us!"



Officer Himmler continued; "Well -i'm here to tell you - we brought in Elise Mandelbaum - closed the door - and within fifteen minutes this guy was screaming for his Momma!

And - when Mrs. Mandelbaum gave him another dose of "you no good lazy worthless bum - get a job - your'e poor wife should have married a Jewish Doctor - you failure - you fat weak spineless lazy loser ..... on and on......."

"Well - this guy begged for a map and a pointer and said he would give us everything we wanted - if only she would shut up!"



"I mean - she saved us hundreds - maybe thousands of lives! You gotta understand - it's hard enough for an American to deal with this kind of nagging - but - these Muslims have never heard a woman say anything but "Yes Mohammad - anything you want - please kick me or rape me again"


"I mean - here's a guy who has been killing and maiming since he was ten years old - his eyeball is hanging out of the socket and his nuts are sizzling from the electric shocks - and all his teeth have been kicked in and his toes are all mashed up - and he tells us to get fucked!"

"But - twenty minutes with Elise Mandelbaum from Flatbush Avenue in Brooklyn N.Y - and he's crying like a baby and giving up his family and friends just to make her shut the fuck up."


"Oh - and get this - i say to Elise - "You have performed a major contribution to your country in the war on terror - you have cracked open one of our toughest Al Quaeda terrorists."



"And she says to me - "Let me tell you Mr. - these Muslims are a bunch of weak babies and i don't understand how you let them get away with all this terror business?"


She concluded, said Himmler; " My Abe Mandelbaum is a weak piece of shit - and he has withstood my nagging for the last twenty years. - And just thank God you don't have terrorists like him running around!"


At this point - the President replied : "Thanks officer Himmler - i want you to recruit a special unit of the most viscious nagging American wives you can find -and you can start with my mother in law -- heh heh heh!"

Late Breaking News -upon hearing he would be interrogated by Mrs. Mandelbaum -Mr. Baradar -recently captured head of Taliban intelligence in Afghsnistan -asked for a tape recorder and has been spilling his guts to western and Pakistani intelligence agents - "And he has not stopped crying" said Moishe Pipick -head interrogator,

$ 8.50 Per Hour and FREE Rooms at Holiday Express?

My young friend just got a job at the brand new local Holiday Express - she was very excited about getting a job at the front desk earning $8.50 an hour:

But I suddenly realized -"Holy Shit! -the average unhighly skilled American worker is totally doomed!" Oh and this is someone who makes a wonderful appearance -has two years of college -is bright - is literate -and a strong communicator"

I got to thinking about My first job in 1963 where i was paid $125 dollars per week. -- AND - i just discovered that a 1963 dollar is worth $7.10 in 2010 dollars figuring inflation:

SO -my friends $340 paycheck should be roughly $800 if it were keeping up with just basic inflation VS. 1963 -but that's only part of this horrible story if we now look at what you could buy for your bucks back in 1963:

Cost Of Living 1963

How Much things cost in 1963
Yearly Inflation Rate USA 1.24%
Yearly Inflation Rate UK 1.8%
Year End Close Dow Jones Industrial Average 762
Average Cost of new house $12,650.00
Average Income per year $5,807.00
Gas per Gallon 29 cents
Average Cost of a new car $3,233.00
Loaf of bread 22 cents
Bedroom Air Conditioner $149.95

So you all know what all this stuff costs now -and even if my friend was getting paid a reasonable salary in terms of the inflation since 1963 she wouldn't be able to buy shit without going into deep debt (and of course credit has now vanished) - But with her roughly $290 weekly take home salary from the big sports at Holiday Express -well - need i say more about her prospects for a bountiful existence?

Oh -and while we're at it - let's take a look at the minimum wage situation facing all those folks who don't have the prescence or skills of my "highly paid" young friend: (if you don't know that was sarcasm stop reading and kill yourself)

This December 1st will mark nine years and three months since the last increase. Thus, unless Congress acts quickly, so that a federal minimum wage increase is actually put into place before then, on December 2nd the federal minimum wage will have remained at the same level for the longest period since it was established

The lack of action on the minimum wage has led to a dramatic erosion in its value.

• The minimum wage now equals only 31 percent of the average wage for private sector, nonsupervisory workers. This is the lowest share since at least the end of World War II.
• Since September 1997, the purchasing power of the minimum wage has deteriorated by 20 percent. After adjusting for inflation, the value of the minimum wage is at its lowest level since 1955.

The decline in the value of the minimum wage is part and parcel of a disturbing feature of the recovery from the 2001 recession: its failure to significantly improve the well-being of most workers. Instead, the benefits of our impressive productivity growth rates have largely flowed to those at the top of the income and wealth scale.

Oh well -like i said at the beginning --"Holy Shit! -the average unhighly skilled American worker is totally doomed!"

You know -another sign of the impending doom struck home when the father of my young friend said "And she gets free rooms at Holiday Expresses all over the World"

"Where in the fuck do you think she is going? -She's a fucking pauper you moron!"

Hey -but the real story here is that the Holiday Express folks give these jobs to kids like my friend who is livin with her boyfriend's parents while finishing college at night -BUT - remember when these jobs went to adults who could support their families comfortably with those salaries back then when there was a fair distribution of the goodies in America (and their wives stayed home with the kids)

Gone forever -next up - I"M afraid - Class Warfare!

How The Church Tried To Ruin Valentine's Day

On this day of amative imaginings and billet- doux - I thought you might be interested in the Pagan provenance of Valentine's day --"Lupercalia"

"The Lupercalia festival was in honor of the She-Wolf who suckled the infant orphans, Romulus and Remus, the founders of Rome. Explaining the name of the festival, Lupercalia, which translates out into "Wolf Festival." The festival was celebrated near the cave of Lupercal on the Palatine (where Rome was founded, see Livy, Book I), to expiate and purify new life in the Spring.

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The festival began with the sacrifice by the Luperci (or the flamen dialis) of two male goats and a dog. Next two patricianyoung Luperci were led to the altar, to be anointed on their foreheads with the sacrificial blood, which was wiped off the bloody knife with wool soaked in milk, after which they were expected to smile and laugh; the smearing of the forehead with blood probably refers to human sacrifice originally practised at the festival.

The sacrificial feast followed, after which the Luperci cut thongs from the skins of the victims, which were called Februa, dressed themselves in the skins of the sacrificed goats -- and then everyone ran around fornicating and drinking and dancing until they dropped!

This looked like too much fun to the Ancient Queer Priests so they turned it into a sappy, lovey dovey religious farce - BUT!

Little did they know that healthy modern folks of all ages would return to their Lupercalic roots - only with different outfits and bling.

This is a sure sign that the rule of the Queer Priests is waning - but we gotta bring back the goats and she wolves!

Happy Lupercalia everyone!