Fat Malibu,CA Tourists Get Tickets for Exceeding 120 BMI

 we shoulda stayed in Dayton Martha

 No Porkers Allowed in The Park

In a first of it's kind local ordinance-Malibu has established a violation for being "Obese Within City Limits".

"We don't want fat tourists in Malibu and none of our full time residents has a Body Mass Index over 112"said Carl Smyth - Malibu's Sheriff."

He said; "If you are a porker it's gonna cost you $500 and ten dollars more for every pound of fat over the 120 BMI limit -so go somewhere else - try Dayton,Ohio -ha ha ha"

"Why did you establish this mean violation?" asked digibandit reporter Elise Mandelbaum?"

Smythe replied: "These folks look like shit and Malibu is perfect the way it is AND they have a huge Carbon imprint."

"We want slender gals like you Elise with big ta ta's!"