Christian Conservatives are NOW in Obama Hell - Hallelujah -End of Moron Times

The end of times has come for these mental midgets - and Christian Conservatives are crying in their barns and bars -Coulter and Santorum and Perry and Rush and that black Pizza moron and Michelle the Loony Bachman and Palin The Mental Midget and the evil Newt all wishing god would make Obama disappear (they sure made Mitt disappear with their nasty ignorant bible crap) -and all those kids who might now get a chance to grow up normal. -Hallelujah!

General David Petraeus says "I Couldn't Control" My Dick Surge"

CIA Director David Petraeus resigned Friday, citing an extramarital affair and "extremely poor judgment." -"my dick just surged out of control for her."

 His "Dick Surge" sure beats The Iraq Surge

 She's hotter than a dick seeking missile

He said -"The Iraqi surge was nothing next to the surge in my pants when i look at this women naked!" 

 

 

 

,

Petraeus told President Barack Obama of his affair and offered his resignation during a meeting Thursday, a senior official told NBC News.
In a statement, Obama said he accepted Petraeus’s resignation on Friday and told The CIA Director that we can't have our Generals "surging" after all the hot pussy in the pentagon.

Romney Attempts Suicide says Ann Romney

"He seemed fine when we got home to the Mansion  - i had the cooks prepare his favorite caviar omlette and they made some home made ice cream for him which i thought would be soothing" said Ann.

"I went out to the stables and pet the horses for a while and then had my servants bathe  me and give me a pedicure which i needed (the campaign has been death to my personal grooming) and then i strolled over to our Spa and had my trainers give me a massage and then had the butler bring me a little glass of Champagne to quiet my nerves."

She continued: "Just then our head of security ran in and said he found Mitty all tangled up in his Mormon underwear and standing on a Louis XV $200,000 chair with his Gucci belt around his neck - and Mitty was screaming:

"Those fucking Mexicans and Queers and Kikes and young hooligans just cost me the election - why? why? why? did i ever listen to those Redneck fucking Tea Party Christian Morons led by those two ignorant cunts Bachman and Palin and that wop Santorum."

"I can't take it! -The Mormon God has forsaken me for that muslim Nigger!"

Ann continued;"WELL - Mittens seems to have completely lost his bearings and this is just too much for me so i'm taking my kids and thirty nine grandchildren away on our yacht to The Greek Islands until Mittens gets his balls back in order -and -it better be soon or he's on his own and i know Bain capitol does NOT want him back so MAYBE HE CAN JUST BECOME A FUCKING mISSIONARY IN THE CONGO OR SOME OTHER NIGGER HELL HOLE!"

Fox TV Announces "I Got Randy during Sandy"

Fox Reality President Myron Schlockwell announced in Hollywood today:

"We are gonna show the world that when American's are in a disaster the thing they do best is fuck each other!"

He went on: "We are gonna show what happens when a drug ridden consumptive  culture which lives on Spectacle and Hoo Ra Ra are confined to quarters with the lights out and the wind howlin!!!"

"Fucking and Snorting and drinking and Sucking and Cornholing everything in sight with  wild abandon while houses and families get blown away (hehhehe)"

He said "This is Fox TV at it's best -appealing to the hard core morons who lap this shit up like ass candy!!!"

Oklahahoma - New Home to Dickless Redneck Morons Carrying Guns in Public

Oklahoma is the place where “going postal” became an unfortunate American cliché a generation ago after 14 co-workers were shot dead by a postal worker who then killed himself. It is the 15th state to legalize open carry on the fatuous promise that public safety will be

Two dozen men with guns entered an Oklahoma City diner promptly at midnight on Wednesday, intent on inaugurating a pernicious new law allowing the state’s 142,000 citizens with concealed-handgun licenses to begin wearing their loaded weapons publicly. “I just feel more secure and safe,” Joe Wood, an aircraft mechanic, told The Oklahoman newspaper, his Taurus PT145 pistol ready for action against any sudden attack by the eggs and burgers. enhanced. The only obvious purpose is to allow macho gun enthusiasts — not true sportsmen — to display the intimidating power of the gun before the rest of the public, as was the case two years ago when protesters showed up at political gatherings with holstered weapons.

Can you fucking imagine the mentality of these redneck freaks just hoping they can get to shoot something -ANYTHING - just dying to prove they have a cock and balls - dying to make up for their weak shithole of a life.

their poor wives and kids

Why Men's Cocks and Balls Are Shrinking

There you have it!

Constant and Unrelenting Ballbusting from Frustrated Women who just need a good screwing!

The Redneck Wolfkiller's are Back in Wisconsin and Minnesota

 makes me feel like i have a dick

The legalization of wolf hunting in both states was devised to manage a rebounding wolf population after the federal government stopped listing the species as endangered in the region last year. Both have drawn lawsuits from local and national animal rights groups that fear the undoing of nearly four decades of work to restore a healthy number of wolves.


So now the lunatic fringe of the wacko general hunting crowd are hanging around Gun n Ammo shops in Shitburgs all across Wisconsin and minnesota - drinking  their booze and commenting about the "liberal pansy elite Jews " who spoiled all their cruel fun last year.

"Those fucking queer tree huggers kaint stop us this time!" said Wally "small cock" Thatcher" - over at the 'Boise Gun Barrel Bar and Grill' "I promised young Wally Jr. he would get to kill a wolf this season."

"Well hell -the guvernmint ainta gonna stop me nohow!" said Perliss "Pork Fat" Williams, "I'm gonna kill me a wolf -just like that Sarah Palin and her Eskimo husband do - and if'n i see any Jews out there in the woods - they gonna get a bullet too!"

"Hey Yooo!" - "Hee yoo -mah haha!" said small cock - yep - boy would i like to kill a Kike - and i'd put his head over the mantle with his Yomicker still on it"

"Well youd have to take that doe head down to put up the Jew -wuntcha?" said pork fat.

'Small cock replied "Id'd be worth it!"
 -

SO the good ole boys will get all liquored up and do what they do best -kill beautiful animals just because they are fucking morons with no life -  and be cruel to their wives and children.

Galveston hurricane killed 12,000 in 1900 -NO Warnings back Then

The Hurricane of 1900 made landfall on September 8, 1900 in the city of Galveston, Texas, in the United States.^[1] It had estimated winds of 145 miles per hour (233 km/h) at landfall, making it a Category 4 storm on the Saffir–Simpson Hurricane Scale.^[2] It was the deadliest hurricane in US history, and the second costliest hurricane in US history based on the US dollar's 2005 value (to compare costs with those of Hurricane Katrina and others).
The hurricane caused great loss of life with the estimated death toll between 6,000 and 12,000 individuals;^[3] the number most cited in official reports is 8,000, giving the storm the third-highest number of deaths or injuries of any Atlantic hurricane, after the Great Hurricane of 1780 and 1998's Hurricane Mitch. The Galveston Hurricane of 1900 is the deadliest natural disaster ever to strike the United States. By contrast, the second-deadliest storm to strike the United States, the 1928 Okeechobee Hurricane, caused more than 2,500 deaths, and the deadliest storm of recent times, Hurricane Katrina, claimed the lives of approximately 1,800 people.

"American Bible Challenge" contestants should be Sterilized

 Now watch this and tell me that these people should be allowed to breed


http://gsntv.com/shows/the-american-bible-challenge/videos/

 Every contestant on this show should be taken to a mental institution and chained to a wall and kept sedated for the rest of their lives - their guns should be confiscated -their farm animals sent for rehabilitation from sexual abuse - and their children put in re-education homes if it's not too late for them. 




 Casting Call: In November and December, GSN will host a nationwide search for contestants for its original series, The American Bible Challenge hosted by Jeff Foxworthy. We are looking for mental midgets and brainwashed zealots who have spent their lives memorizing a book that was put together by bronze age nomads as their creation myth.

Contestants must have a BMI of over 146 and be able to make their eyes glow and have that special 'Price is Right"kinda moronic enthusiasm for crap.   

The second season of the show will premiere in 2013.  Casting session are presently underway in Los Angeles through December 1 and will also visit Memphis on November 15; Nashville and Detroit on November 17; and Atlanta and Dallas on December 1.  Produced by RelativityREAL, additional casting information and applications for season two can be found at GSNTV.com, call323.860.6703 or send an email to: biblechallenge2012@gmail.com for further instructions on how to apply.

God Bless America and All It's Donkey Fuckers

 Where a country's constitution protects this kind of comedy:

You are have some shot at Happiness

http://www.thedailyshow.com/watch/tue-october-16-2012/back-in-black---lance-armstrong--butt-chugging---farm-animal-sex?xrs=share_fb

http://www.uproxx.com/media/2012/10/predictably-hilarious-lewis-black-on-buttchugging-and-sex-with-farm-animals/

Sandy is Gonna be one Bad Ass Blow Job - be Careful Out There

"Our goal has been to get people to appreciate the magnitude of the storm and try to prove to them that, based on everything we know, that this is going to be a system that is outside of their experience," Norcross said.
The Weather Channel sent a message via Twitter calling it "an extraordinary storm, an extremely serious threat" and urged followers to re-tweet it. The storm "will occupy a place in the annals of weather history as one of the most extraordinary to have affected the United States," the network tweeted."

Quickly, the Business Insider tweeted: "WHOA. The Weather Channel meteorologist just completely freaked out."

"Out With A Bang!" Plan Endorsed By AARP

 

DR.MOISHE PIPICK - PRESIDENT OF THE AARP (ALMOST ALIVE RETIRED PEOPLE) -WHICH COVERS 68% OF ALL SENIORS -ANNOUNCED TODAY:

“Everyone sees it but no one wants to talk about About $67 billion — nearly a third of the money spent by Medicare — goes to patients in the last two years of life. The need to spend less money at the end of life “is the elephant in the room,” Evan Thomas wrote in “The Case for Killing Granny,” the cover story in last week’s Newsweek. “Everyone sees it but no one wants to talk about

Dr. Pipick continued: "Under the 'Go Out With A Bang!" plan - If you have less than three years to live - -THen - instead of wasting away and being shlepped from one test and one Doctor to another -and then finally and inevitably expiring with your loved ones broke while watching you turn into a dead cabbage roll:

"You can "Go Out With A Bang" - Yep -we'll give you a cash payment (twenty percent of what your treatment would have been) and ALL the drugs and/or booze you want - including synthetic Viagra which will turn your libido back 50 years -AND then you have access to all the Male and/or Female hookers you desire until the deal terminates!

Pipick concluded; " The savings wil result in the average medical plan costing most folks under three -hundred dollars a year -And that's with universal coverage - including illegal aliens!"

Republican leaders said "This will save the economy" And The Tea Partu called it a breakthrough in controlling medical costs."

Posted 6th May 2011 by Dave Nelson

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Zionists are as Cookoo as The fucking Mullahs or any Priests

 Hi -I am a fucking Zealot -vote Romney

 me too

Prominent Religious Zionism Rabbi Eliezer Melamed calls on American citizens to support Republican presidential hopeful. 'Obama has proved he is not a true friend of Israel,' he states 

In an unusual statement on US affairs, the rabbi argued that "the true friends of Israel" must be supported both in the presidential election and in the Congressional and Senate elections.

Oh  -and i am a total supporter of Israel -but they have to put the screws to these theocratic bullies who rant and pray to some tooth fairy in the sky - while those who won their freedom and security with balls and sweat and tears and brains did/do all the heavy lifting -as usual and have to live and die in the real world -not some tribal fantasy.. 

Oh - and that is not to revere and respect The Talmudic tradition of learning and respect for law and basic goodness and virtue that has sustained the Jews since their expulsion in 70BCE from the same Temple they  pray at as we speak.

 Baruch Spinoza

the Jews flourished and survived because they were lucky enough to have their Priest Class oblitered - nutsos like the Zionist Rabbi Eliezer Malamed -and replaced with wise men who respected secular and democratic values -The great Rebbe Scholars/ Philosopher tradition. (Spinoza -Maimonedes )

 it's ok to eat pussy on The Sabath

 
 

Bibi Sending a BIG "Fuck You" Greeting Card To Ahmadinejad - Real Soon

Hope you are somewhere safe and sound because this fucker is going to reduce your Nuclear Aspirations to a pile of Rubble -including the whole fucking Mountain you hid the shit in AND when the Republican Army Guard learns that you wrecked the whole economy for nothing they are going to stone your filthy ass to death.

Now that's irony worthy of Shakespeare!

USA Network Goes heavy into Sexual Content

"The Cornholing Moonshiners" is Baaack!!! on Discovery

The illegal moonshine trade will be revisited when " The Cornholing Moonshiners" debuts a second season on Discovery Channel November 7 at 10p.  Season two continues to follow bootleggers who follow their family traditions as they practice the art of making moonshine while trying to evade law enforcement.  Moonshiners is produced for Discovery Channel by Magilla Entertainment.

The Discovery Channel has joined the crowd and will now find any kind of worthless crap "Discoverable' to get ratings from the "Moron" demographic which is not their great strength (but soon maybe?)

In  the opening episode of this season Lem and Clem Hartnoogy will produce a batch of Moonshine and then invite their Redneck Christian Trash neighbors over for a party where they Cornhole anything in sight:

The Story of Life - This Picture Says It ALL

This is an infra red picture taken by a camera hidden in The New Jersey Pine Barrens showing a Mountain Lion about to pounce on and devour a poor unsuspecting  Deer.

Rich and Powerful  socio and pschopathic  homeo sapien males have been doing just that to the weak and poor and lame for over two million years now.

Romney and Ryan and their crowd just have better clothes and manners.

Snap out of it - turn around and start fighting back!

"Coyote Arm" Conference Draws Millions To Switzerland

Men -from around the world - who have chewed off their arm so as to not risk waking the "Beast" they found snuggled up next to them after a drunken night of partying - joined together in Basil Switzerland today -To celebrate their collegial honor and bravery -and to warn "Men Everywhere" of the potential consequences of " "Blind Drunken Passion".

Moishe Pipick - Leader of the UCAF (Universal Coyote Arm federation) - chosen for being the first man to chew off BOTH arms when he woke up with TWINS - who in his words. "Defied the theory of evolution" announced:

"Men who have lost an arm in the service of drunken passion - bear witness and testimony to our eternal weakness for " "BlindDrunken Pussy" and the price some of us must pay for the dignity of All men Everywhere!"

Mr. Pipick went on; "And while there has been an attempt by the women marching outside our gathering to establish a "Coyote Arm" organization of their own -we can see by the number of one armed women marching - that they have a limited following"

"And - we have it on good sources - that most of those one armed women were the victims of MEN who got their arms mixed up"

"And in conclusion" - said Pipick -"I am so proud to see the growing numbers of TWO ARM Coyote Men". -"It takes great courage to chew off both arms - And we salute them!"

Boy Scout Oath to Be Changed -Cornhole Warning added

Original

 Campfire Cornholing is what i love about the outdoors

On my honor, I will do my best

To do my duty to God and my country and to obey the Scout Law;

To help other people at all times;

To keep myself physically strong, mentally awake and morally straight. 

New line added 

he gave me stuff and then stuck his dick in me

And to watch  out for my Scoutmaster who might be trying to cornhole me

No Gays BUT Lots of Cornholing Scoutmasters -In The Boy Scouts

Holy Churchmen - Revered Football Coaches and TADA - Now Scoutmasters

On Wednesday, the LA Times reported that the files revealed a pattern of grooming behavior, in which men seduced their young victims by offering them gifts, favors, counseling and one-on-one attention. In many cases, the alleged molesters spent time alone with Scouts — a practice long discouraged by the organization and formally prohibited in 1987.
In September, The Times reported that the Boy Scouts failed to report hundreds of alleged child molesters to police and often hid the allegations from parents and the public.
Scouting officials frequently urged admitted offenders to quietly resign and helped many cover their tracks, allowing them to cite bogus reasons for their departure.

In 80% of the 500 cases in which the Scouts were the first to learn about abuse, there is no record of Scouting officials reporting the allegations to police. In more than 100 of the cases, officials actively sought to conceal the alleged abuse or allowed the suspects to hide it, The Times found.

Nine days after that report, the Boy Scouts announced that it would conduct a comprehensive review of about 5,000 files going back to the 1940s and would report to law enforcement any cases it had not previously disclosed.
 day
Same old story - off to Church on Sunday -rape a kid on Monday - then cover it up with the help of yoyr good Christian neighbors.

'My Shopping Addiction gets me Wetter than My Husband" on Oxygen

 Shopping makes me Climax

 I get Wet thinking about shopping

Well this new series premiered on Oxygen last Monday at 11p and delivered 657,000 total viewers as well as 432,000 among A18-49, according to Nielsen.  -These viewers ought to be lined up and have their tubes tied before they bring any more future moron gal shoppers into the world.

"Cornholing Polish Polka Party with Mollie Busta - on Family Net

Rural Media Group, Inc., comprised of RFD-TV, RURAL TV and Family Net has handed a two-year renewal to its weekly polka music program, "Mollie B Polka Polish CornHole Party" hosted by Mollie Busta.  The one-hour show highlights the nation's best polka bands and other ethnic music styles with Cornholing Competitions produced on location at music venues around the country.

  Rural CornHoling Media Group also produces the Mollie B Christmas Special taking place at RFD-TV The Theatre in Branson, MO November 11-12.  

The special will air multiple times in December on RFD-TV and RURAL TV. and feature fat Polish dancers CornHoling each other during the dance routines.

CMT and Steve Austin bring back "Redneck CornHole Island"

Saturday nights on CMT brings back a second season of Redneck CornHole Island starting November 10 at 9p followed by the premieres of two new series Chainsaw Gang at 10p and Big Texas Heat at 1030p.  

"Redneck Cornhole Island" watches as fourteen people gather on pro wrestling hall of famer Steve Austin's tropical island for a chance to win $100,000 by Cornholing the most native people and animals -and then each other. 

Chainsaw Gang features chainsaw artist Stacy Poitras who leads a group of chainsaw artists that battle it out to create works of redneck shit art.  New series Big Texas Heat follows the on and off-duty activities of the police department in the small town of Trinity, TX where all the Police have IQ's under 85 and BMI's of 160 and up. (slightly above the average for all of Texas)

Butt Fucking Time for The Poor if The Republicans Prevail

All comprehensive economic studies forecast a future of exacerbating inequality (as an ever-increasing share of declining productivity growth goes to the top), the wealthy are acutely aware that the political threat to their status and comfort would come from rising popular demand for policies of income redistribution

The Republican Party is determined to protect the Bush tax cuts; to prevent tax hikes; to further cut domestic social spending; and, more broadly, to take a machete to the welfare state.

"The Poor are like Sheep"Ann Romney

Insofar as Republicans prevail in their twin aims of cutting – or even eliminating – social spending, and maintaining or lowering tax rates, they will have succeeded in obstructing the restoration of social insurance programs in the future.

Affluent Republicans – the donor and policy base of the conservative movement — are on red alert. They want to protect and enhance their position in a future of diminished resources. What really provokes the ferocity with which the right currently fights for regressive tax and spending policies is a deeply pessimistic vision premised on a future of hard times. 

This vision has prompted the Republican Party to adopt a preemptive strategy that anticipates the end of growth and the onset of sustained austerity – a strategy to make sure that the size of their slice of the pie doesn’t get smaller as the pie shrinks.
This is the underlying and inadequately explored theme of the 2012 election.

American Family Association is OUR Christian Taliban

The Southern Poverty Law Center recently added the American Family Foundation to its national list of active hate groups, which also includes neo-Nazis, black separatists and Holocaust deniers.

 The swirl around Mix It Up at Lunch Day whose objective is to relieve tensions and increase harmony among students reflects a deeper battle between the Southern Poverty Law Center, a civil-rights group founded 41 years ago in Montgomery, Ala.,  

The American Family Association,  isa Bible-based cultural watchdog organization in Tupelo, Miss. The association says its mission is to fight what it calls the “increasing ungodliness” in America and that Mix It Up Day will bring "godly" kids into contact with "ungodly kids"

 

You just know when a group or individual starts talking about "increasing ungodliness" that the hypocrites and morons and hater demigogues are on the loose again.

Scariest thing about it is that these bible belting American Mullahs  pass that crap brainwashing Dogma down onto THEIR kids who just keep the crap flowing from generation to generation.

BUT -some good news -their numbers are diminishing as more and more of their offspring realize through the fog of their indoctrination that their parents are just fucking mean - ignorant - zealots!