xmlns:og='http://ogp.me/ns#'. The Digibandit: Mar 13, 2007

Tuesday, March 13, 2007

Fox annnounces"I Will Leave My Husband For George Clooney"

Fox entertainment president Moishe Pipick announced it's revolutionary new reality show "I Will Leave My Husband For George Clooney", starring George Clooney. He said: "women are lining up by the thousands to be selected as finalists - where ten married women will spend a week in his mansion on the Hawaiian island of Molokai where they have agreed to have sex with him -- including but not limited to oral and anal sex -- and will compete for his attention in the hope that he will choose them as his "hawaiian sex slave". -- Winners will receive one million dollars and a week with George alone in his mansion. --All the women will go through an on air judging process similar to American Idol except they will perform a strip tease and undergo cross examination by the celebrity judges with their current husbands , family and children (all contestants must have at least three children and be married for a minimum of ten years.)

All the women will agree to have abortions should they become pregnant as George does not enjoy protected sex -- in addition all contestants will be caucasian as he does not like black kinky hair.

Britney Pregnant With Dr.Phil's Baby

Confidential sources at the Hazeldon Recovery Center in Minnesota confirmed that Britney Spears is pregnant with a baby girl and that the father is the reknowned television therapist Dr. Phil.

"Dr. Phil was visiting Britney in an attempt to redirect her life and after sharing some of her meds -- he did some serious redirecting all right!" -- said Dr. Moishe Pipick,head of extreme case rehabilitation at the esteemed Hazeldon facility. He went on;"A nurse in Britney's ward became alarmed when screams of ,"save me! save me! oh save me deeper!" where heard coming from Britney's room -- and upon entering,said Nurse Ratchitt, "we found Britney tied to the bed with dental floss and the Dr. and Britney where clearly both wacked out of their minds and going at it like crazy."

Mrs. Phil --Dr. Phil's wife of thirty five years said; " i'm destroyed - he hasn't touched me in thirty four years -- i put on some weight after the birth of our son (180 pounds -- see picture) but he always said; "it's fine dear, there's just more to love" -- you know how he gives such wonderful advice and guidance on the television.

Dr. Phil and the Beaming Britney could not be reached for comment, but Oprah Winfrey who is in Africa negotiating to buy Tanzania said: "This is so shocking! --what's next? -- Deepak Chopra with Paris Hilton?"