xmlns:og='http://ogp.me/ns#'. The Digibandit: Jan 11, 2010

Monday, January 11, 2010

Fox Tv Announces - "From Fags To Stags" Boot Camp

"You come in as a Homo and leave as a Romeo" says executive producer Moishe Pipick speaking on behalf of Fox Reality Pres.Mike Schlocko who is visiting Bernie Madoff in federal Prison to discuss a potential program.

"Over the course of twelve weeks our drill instructors -who make Victoria Secrets models look like boys -and who in addition to being the greatest pieces of ass on Earth -are also behavioral psychiatrists -will have these homo recruits screwing like a Guido on the Jersey Shore"

Pipick went on; "we will follow them as they convert from "Tuchas Tigers" - into "Snatch Busters" -and we will witness the pride and joy that their families will experience in seeing their transition into happy and fulfilled "Real Men"

"This is another example of Fox Reality TV's commitment to presenting compelling -must watch programs -while simultaneously helping to uplift society."

He concluded; "The one disappointment in the production is that we had to eliminate the Priests from the Boot Camp"

"They were using it to prey (oops a pun) on the recruits and to try and cornhole all the young kids in the area where we where shooting"

He concluded: "If you have a homo friend or family member or are a fagott yourself - call us at 1-800- fag - camp -and start the New Year on top (get it?)

Fox TV Announces " Drunken Irish Beach House"

"If you think MTV's "Jersey Shore," starring the "hottest, tannest, craziest Guidos" around as they wade (carefully) through the (dirty) water and step (gingerly) on the (needle-ridden) sand on their way to down Jagerbombs -- is the stuff that hits are made from -just wait until you see what a drunken group of "Micks" are up to when they frolic in THEIR beach house in Sea Gate NJ (AKA The Irish Riviera) -on the Southern Jersey Shore."


So said Mike Schlocker President of Fox Tv Reality -he continued:


"Hey -no matter how raunchy and macho crazed and out of control the Wops are -they they are still the descendents of the folks who conquered the known world and pulled Europe out of the Dark Ages and gave us DaVinci and Michaelangelo - and even the guy who DISCOVERED The Jersey Sre!"


Schlocker went on "These wops always maintain a modicum of culture and family and even decency in their overall behavior -and they can all cook like Chefs and deep down (no matter how fucked up they get) -- they respect women because well -they all have Grandmothers like Mother Theresa and fathers like Michael Corleone.


He said "BUT -the white trash Micks have absolutely NO sense of propriety or even humanity after their first case of beer!"(82%of ther fathers are alcoholics and 68% of their mothers -according to latest research polls)


'I mean - A Wop might get into a fight and slap his chick and tear up the joint -but then he settles down with a nice espresso and some anisette- smokes a camel and takes his chick to bed and fucks her like a Stallion"


"BUT - With the Mick drunkards it's just non stop puking and breaking shit and then out looking for Jews and Blacks and Homos to beat up -and then it's home for more puking -and then they fall asleep while their girlfriends go out to find an Italian to fuck them silly!"


"I mean" continued Schlocker: "Is this not the stuff that great Fox Reality hits are made of?"


"I would say -Yes! -Definitely -and next season how about "Nigga Beach House In ASbury Park"