xmlns:og='http://ogp.me/ns#'. The Digibandit: Apr 11, 2009

Saturday, April 11, 2009

jesus Spending Easter With Anna Nicole Smith Again

Jesus Will Spend Easter Shacked Up With Anna Nicole Smith


Jesus who has not returned to heaven since his fling with Anna Nicole Smith,after her death from electrical shock due to a short in her powerful vibrator; and who has been seen partying with a variety of hot chicks,both dead and alive -- has decided to ignore his Father's demands to return to Heaven on the anniversary of his resurrection.



Jesus said,"I'm more interested in erection than resurrection right now!"



He was overheard talking with a bartender in Malibu; " I was cooped up with God for so long without any pussy that i just went nuts -- when Anna died i decided to jump her,and now all i can think about is making up for lost time -- the simple truth is that Jesus is a party animal!"



"I plan on spending Easter with Anna and Marilyn Monroe and maybe ava Gardner and Scarlett Johanson.



"The great thing about being Jesus is that i get to fuck all the pussy i want --dead or alive."



He concluded,"Anyway ,it's gonna be a great Easter -- as Anna always says -- "Jesus, you give new meaning to bringing back the dead ."



And as for my Father -- if he didn't hog all the pussy for himself and his disciples -- i wouldn't have turned into a wild cunt man."
at 2:48 PM

Top Comics Begin "Laugh-You Fucking Fundamentalist" Tour

Chris Rock -who will lead the Middle East Tour said today -

"Hey -you show me a country where there is no stand-up Comedy - and i will show you a violent motherfucking stink hole of a place guaranteed. "

He said; "Here's a typical Muslim fundamentalist joke:

" Arak - did you know my cousin blew a Jew? - No! - What You mean Mucak? - Your cousin blew a Jew? He must be killed! - Yes Arak - he blew him up with fifty other infidels -- hahahahahahahhahahahha"

Rock concluded; "Well wer'e gonna change all that and bring some laughs to these repressed uptight -no laughin motha fuckas. - Me and my friends - and i hope we don't get blown."

!Dan AhdootAhmed AhmedFranklyn AjayeRicardo AlemanByron AllenTim AllenWoody AllenLouie AndersonAnt (comedian)Anthony JeselnikCraig AntonJudd ApatowDave AttellBMaria BamfordJanette BarberArj BarkerLeonard BarrRoseanne BarrTodd BarryRob BartlettBruce BaumJoy BeharRichard BelzerSara BenincasaD. C. BennyJack BennyMilton BerleShelley BermanSandra BernhardMichelle BiloonDes BishopJoey BishopLewis BlackChris BlissAndy BlitzJosh BlueBob and Tom Radio: The Comedy TourBill BraudisKevin Brennan (comedian)Neal BrennanDavid BrennerDylan BrodyAlbert BrooksLenny BruceLord BuckleyAndy BumataiGeorge BurnsBill BurrSteve ByrneCLouis C.K.Charlie CallasYisrael CampbellMario CantoneJohn CaparuloJohn CaponeraDrew CareyGeorge CarlinRodney CarringtonCarrot TopJohnny CarsonDarren Carter (comedian)T. K. CarterDana CarveyDick CavettKyle CeaseCedric the EntertainerC cont.Dave ChappelleStuart CharnoHenry ChoMargaret ChoChris McDevittAdam ChristingBlake ClarkLenny ClarkeAndrew Dice ClayJerry ClowerIan CoburnMark Cohen (comedian)Kim ColesChristopher CollinsKaitlin ColomboDane CookJay CooperPat CooperIrwin CoreyBill CosbyTom CotterWayne CotterDave CoulierDavid CrossBilly CrystalDDan BennettRodney DangerfieldVince DantonaJim DavidLarry DavidDov DavidoffTommy DavidsonDeRay DavisMatt Davis (comedian)Ellen DeGeneresJessica DelfinoDennis ReganBarry Diamond (American comedian)Dustin DiamondPhyllis DillerGaylord DinglerNick DiPaoloTom DreesenMike DruckerAl DucharmeJeff DunhamKyle DunniganJeff DuranWill DurstEEarthquake (comedian)Tom EatonChris EdgerlyBill EngvallFMark FajeMitch FatelWayne FedermanHarvey FiersteinChristian FinneganGreg FitzsimmonsJames FlahertyCrista FlanaganCharles FleischerMichael FloorwaxKarith FosterJeff FoxworthyJamie FoxxRedd FoxxF cont.Pablo FranciscoJudah FriedlanderPaul FrisbieDavid FryeGJim GaffiganZach GalifianakisGallagher (comedian)Janeane GarofaloRuss GebhardtJohnny GingerGreg GiraldoTodd GlassGod's PotteryJudy GoldBobcat GoldthwaitGilbert GottfriedJames Gregory (comedian)David Alan GrierEddie GriffinKathy GriffinHBuddy HackettTiffany HaddishBrian HaleyStanley Myron HandelmanChelsea HandlerRalph Harris (comedian)Robin HarrisSteve HarveyAllan HaveyMitch HedbergBrently HeilbronShirley HemphillJohn HensonJohn HentonApril Lee HernándezBill HicksRené HicksStephanie HodgeSteve HofstetterMike HollingsworthPete HolmesD. L. HughleyReginald D. HunterIIrving LouisJKevin James (actor)Richard JeniMaz JobraniJake JohannsenCathe JonesKMilt KamenGabe KaplanValerie KappaAaron KaroAndy KaufmanGloria Calderon KellettRobert Kelly (comedian)Tom KennyAndy KindlerAlan King (comedian)Sam KinisonBill KirchenbauerChristina KirkmanRobert KleinLynne KoplitzJo KoyNick KrollL
at 9:48 AM