xmlns:og='http://ogp.me/ns#'. The Digibandit: May 15, 2010

Saturday, May 15, 2010

"Hunter Gatherer Diet" Endorsed By FDA

Dr.Moishe Pipick -head of Nutrition for the Unites States FDA -and President Obama's go to guy on ALL things nutrition -announced today at a White House press conference:

"Hunter Gatherer's were the strongest and healthiest humans in the history of Evolution!

BUT - today's shitty general mental health and physical health is a by product of diets designed by Homo's and Buddhists (thin maybe - but fucking weak and miserable)

"AND the epidemic of obesity (which is so severe that blacks and rednecks who are the mainstay of those willing to kill or get killed for almost any reason Uncle Sam cooks up) Are now mostly human garbage dumps!"

"A four star General told Obama last week that within five years we wouldn't be able to fight Norway with the shape our Blacks and Southern cannon fodder are in"

Dr. Pipick continued: "If a Hunter Gatherer woke up and ate some fruit and whole grain cereal and then set forth with his tribe on a Mammoth Hunt -- They would give him a dress to wear and a basket of flowers"

He went on: "Twenty thousand years ago a decent breakfast was two Musk Ox eye balls floating in Beaver fat -and a freshly roasted Caribou liver"

"I mean -these guys weren't heading out to a Yoga class and then sitting at a desk all day -The average new age male couldn't even lift the clubs those guys carried -and today's fast food fat teenagers would be turned over to the Priests as temple slaves (for dusk till dawn corn holing)"

Pipick continued: "Anyway -the diet that kept the Hunter gatherer's in shape for survival back then - we have found out through exhaustive testing - IS STILL the perfect diet regimen for today's men (no info is yet available regarding women who pretty much ate leftovers )

"It is a diet rich in fatty Meats - Lots of organs,especially hearts livers and testacles -Beer brewed from bark and grass -and no noshing after dark -except on the person next to you"

No nuts or fruit of any kind except during famines --ALL grains should be only eaten by slaves and homos - NO Juice except fresh squeezed from raw meat(which is a good source of anti oxidents ) -And for Gods sake forget about fish oil and that crap!! (Try Hunting a Sabre Toothed Tiger with the runs "

"Our Hunter Gatherer forefathers knew what to eat and were happy and long lived"

"OH" said Dr. Pipick: "And they weren't pussy wupped either -Obama told me that since he has switched to The Hunter Gatherer Diet -He takes NO shit from Michelle!"