xmlns:og='http://ogp.me/ns#'. The Digibandit: 02/01/2010 - 03/01/2010

Saturday, February 27, 2010

China Has Sabatoged Toyota -Kia is Next!

Japan's leadership with the full backing of the general population has demanded that Toyota's entire board of directors -including President Ichy Toyota - commit Hari kari in the ancient Samurai tradition of maintaining complete honor in the face of defeat or disgrace -By cutting their bowels open -and then being mercifully beheaded with a Samurai sword by a trusted assistant.


'The Toyota leadership has fucked up the reputation of a great National symbol and provider of wealth and sustinence to the Nation and they have completely fucked up the handling of the whole mess!" said Inguchi Tushymoto Japan's Prime Minister.

"Only cleansing by the ultimate and heroic Samurai tradition can restore faith in Toyota among our Foreign markets - and among the Japanese people"

A poll released early today from the Pew National Research Institute showed that 83% of Americans would respond favorably towards Toyota if the board of directors killed themselves.

But Moishe Pipick president of thje National Auto safety Conference announced today:

"Early this morning Mrs. Rachel Ginsberg of Sioux Crap falls , North Dakota was driving along with her five children and the steering wheel of her brand new Toyota Land Cruiser came off in her hands -She was saved by a herd of Bison grazing alongside the highway who cushioned the crash impact"

Pipick continued; "There is growing evidence that Toyota vehicles are literally "falling apart" slowly but surely -and those Japs can start commiting suicide wholesale -but it ain;t gonna work"

Arnold Goldblum an expert in automotive engineering and corporate espionage said today; "Hey -wake the fuck up everybody -This is the Chinks sabatoging the Japs as they prepare to launch their new automotive lines - and dominate the industry -and hurt the Japs who they hate!"

He concluded; "And the Chinks hate the Gooks (aka Koreans) more than the Japs so if i were driving a Kia right now? -I wouldn't! They are next"

Wow! -thank God we owe them our shirts! Other wise we couldn't drive a Caddy without the wheels falling off.

Hey - China IS the future -there's no stopping them -AND soon -speaking of shirts - there will even be AMERICAN laundries - " Hey Johnny - go take the laundry down to the Jews"

That's where I draw the line!

Wednesday, February 24, 2010

St. Paul -Distant Relative Of Rue Paul

Ever wonder why archtetypes in western thought like - Eve, Sarah, Hagar, Esther -Heroic Jewish women of the old testament - have no similar role models in the Christian Bible?

Well -let's look at Gay Paul ( ancient relative of Rue Paul)
"The war that went on between what he desired with his mind and what he desired with his body, his drivenness to a legalistic religion of control, his fear when that system was threatened, his attitude toward women, his refusal to seek marriage as an outlet for his passion -- nothing else accounts for this data as well as the possibility that Paul was gay."

"To me it is a beautiful idea that a homosexual male, scorned then as well as now, living with both the self-judgment and the social judgments that a fearful society has so often and unknowingly pronounced upon the very being of some of its citizens, could nonetheless, not in spite of this but because of this, be the one who would define grace for the Christian people. Grace was the love of God, an unconditional love, that loved Paul just as he was. A rigidly controlled gay male, I believe, taught the Christian church what the love of God means and what, therefore, Christ means as God's agent. Finally, it was a gay male, tortured and rejected, who came to understand what resurrection means as God's vindicating act."

-- Michael Grant
St. Paul, 1967
Charles Scribners Sons

Hey -Check out these revelations

The New Testament Church—The Role of Women

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1 Corinthians 11:3-10 But I want you to understand that Christ is the head of every man, and the man is the head of a woman, and God is the head of Christ. 4 Every man who has something on his head while praying or prophesying, disgraces his head. 5 But every woman who has her head uncovered while praying or prophesying, disgraces her head; for she is one and the same with her whose head is shaved. 6 For if a woman does not cover her head, let her also have her hair cut off; but if it is disgraceful for a woman to have her hair cut off or her head shaved, let her cover her head. 7 For a man ought not to have his head covered, since he is the image and glory of God; but the woman is the glory of man. 8 For man does not originate from woman, but woman from man; 9 for indeed man was not created for the woman’s sake, but woman for the man’s sake. 10 Therefore the woman ought to have a symbol of authority on her head, because of the angels.

1 Corinthians 14:33-35 for God is not a God of confusion but of peace, as in all the churches of the saints. 34 Let the women keep silent in the churches; for they are not permitted to speak, but let them subject themselves, just as the Law also says. 35 And if they desire to learn anything, let them ask their own husbands at home; for it is improper for a woman to speak in church.

1 Timothy 5:10 having a reputation for good works; and if she has brought up children, if she has shown hospitality to strangers, if she has washed the saints’ feet, if she has assisted those in distress, and if she has devoted herself to every good work.

Titus 2:3-5 Older women likewise are to be reverent in their behavior, not malicious gossips, nor enslaved to much wine, teaching what is good, 4 that they may encourage the young women to love their husbands, to love their children, 5 to be sensible, pure, workers at home, kind, being subject to their own husbands, that the word of God may not be dishonored.

See also 1 Timothy 2:9-15, Romans 16:1-6 and Luke 8:1-3.


On the 455th anniversary of Martin Luther’s posting his 95 theses on the church door in Wittenburg, a group of women posted on the doors of 12 Los Angeles churches theses intended to bring the contemporary women’s liberation movement into the life of the Church. Their statement repudiated what they called the primitive thinking of theGay Apostle Paul


Don'T ask -Don't Tell!

Tuesday, February 23, 2010

No Nukes BECAUSE You Are NUTS!

It's as simple as that -and everyone knows that's the real reason we can't let these death worshipers have WMD -But no one wants to say to the Ayatollah:


'Excuse me sir -YOU can't wait to die - it will be a huge improvement over your life - So dontch'a see why we who love LIFE would be a bit concerned about you religious fanaticks having nuclear bombs. -and with your kinda bad attitude toward us Infidels?"

"I mean - we would NEVER let the Pope have nuclear weapons -and they don't want to die quite as much as you guys because at least they drink wine and fuck kids for some fun"

"I mean - you don't get high -you don't laugh - you don't eat pussy - you don't like art or any kind of creativity - you don't like dancing or music - I Mean -What the fuck!?"

"Why don't you just pass one of your many revisions of the real Koran which would allow you to fucking kill yourselves -AND jump feet first into that big pool full of Virgins WITHOUT mustaches? - And then eat some nice clean pussy and some fresh fruit and take a nice dump and wipe WITH Charmin instead of your sandy hand."

"There's GOTTA be Charmin up there wherever you all go -and even Fibrecom to relieve your horrible gas from a lifetime of eating stale figs and shit. - Imagine! -No more constipation!"

'It will be better than you even think it will be - i hear they will even let you have Chinks up there - Some nice pork fried rice and spareribs!"

"Oh and i hear that Allah and Mohammad have a special place for bigshots like you Ayatollah's and Caliphs and suicide bombers of course! - Where you can fuck guys and goats and even do some gambling -and get loaded -and just let it ALL hang out!"

"So - forget the nuclear weapons - Just fucking kill yourselves - just do it - Don't think about it - Do It!"

"And let us get on with our fun loving fucked up lives for as long as we can - and hey -take heart -soon we'll all be dead! "

" Maybe you'll let us use the pool and tennis courts?"

Friday, February 19, 2010

What About All The Dogs Left Behind?

On Christ the Solid Rock I stand, All other ground is sinking sand...

"About the time of the end, a body of men will be raised up, who will turn their attention to the prophecies, in the midst of much clamor and opposition." - Sir Isaac Newton

"I will take you from the nations, gather you from all the lands, and bring you into your own land." Ezekiel 36:24

When you see Jerusalem being surrounded by armies, you will know that its desolation is near. (Luke 21:20)

Nation will rise against nation, and kingdom againstkingdom. (Luke 21:10)

There will be great earthquakes, famines and pestilences in various places, and fearful events and great signs from heaven. (Luke 21:11)

On the earth, nations will be in anguish and perplexity at the roaring and tossing of the sea. (Luke 21:25)

There will be signs in the sun, moon and stars. (Luke 21:25)

Men will faint from terror, apprehensive of what is coming on the world, for the heavenly bodies will be shaken. (Luke 21:26)

When you see these things happening, you know that the kingdom of God is near. (Luke 21:31)

'Call to Me and I will answer you, and I will tell you great and mighty things, which you do not know.' Jeremiah 33:3

Let not your heart be troubled; you believe in God, believe also in Me. In My Father’s house are many mansions; if it were not so, I would have told you. I go to prepare a place for you. And if I go and prepare a place for you, I will come again and receive you to Myself; that where I am, there you may be also. (John 14:1-3)


Wednesday, February 17, 2010

Abdul Ghari Baradar vs. Mrs. Mandelbaum

Agent Lance Himmler - an experienced CIA torturer - has divulged his initial experience with a revolutionary new torture technique - "American Wife Nagging".



He reported on the method yesterday - at a briefing of the Joint Chiefs of Staff - which the President and Secretrary of Defense Gates attended.


"Sustained nagging by an American wife - preferably a miserable Jewish housewife (hey and no anti-semitism intended - some of my best friends in the CIA have been driven nuts by nagging waspy wives) - is the most effective torture application that i have witnessed in my thirty years of trying to crack the toughest terrorist nuts around the world!"



He recounted; "Well -- we had this Al Quaeda leader who was sitting on some highly sensitive intel - and he would not give an inch! - We waterboarded him - we crushed his toes with a hammer - we put a pigs snout up his butt ( you know they hate pork) - we lit up his nuts with electrical charges - we put sulphuric acid on his left eyeball -- and then we got rough with this guy -- and NOTHING - he spit at us!"



Officer Himmler continued; "Well -i'm here to tell you - we brought in Elise Mandelbaum - closed the door - and within fifteen minutes this guy was screaming for his Momma!

And - when Mrs. Mandelbaum gave him another dose of "you no good lazy worthless bum - get a job - your'e poor wife should have married a Jewish Doctor - you failure - you fat weak spineless lazy loser ..... on and on......."

"Well - this guy begged for a map and a pointer and said he would give us everything we wanted - if only she would shut up!"



"I mean - she saved us hundreds - maybe thousands of lives! You gotta understand - it's hard enough for an American to deal with this kind of nagging - but - these Muslims have never heard a woman say anything but "Yes Mohammad - anything you want - please kick me or rape me again"


"I mean - here's a guy who has been killing and maiming since he was ten years old - his eyeball is hanging out of the socket and his nuts are sizzling from the electric shocks - and all his teeth have been kicked in and his toes are all mashed up - and he tells us to get fucked!"

"But - twenty minutes with Elise Mandelbaum from Flatbush Avenue in Brooklyn N.Y - and he's crying like a baby and giving up his family and friends just to make her shut the fuck up."


"Oh - and get this - i say to Elise - "You have performed a major contribution to your country in the war on terror - you have cracked open one of our toughest Al Quaeda terrorists."



"And she says to me - "Let me tell you Mr. - these Muslims are a bunch of weak babies and i don't understand how you let them get away with all this terror business?"


She concluded, said Himmler; " My Abe Mandelbaum is a weak piece of shit - and he has withstood my nagging for the last twenty years. - And just thank God you don't have terrorists like him running around!"


At this point - the President replied : "Thanks officer Himmler - i want you to recruit a special unit of the most viscious nagging American wives you can find -and you can start with my mother in law -- heh heh heh!"

Late Breaking News -upon hearing he would be interrogated by Mrs. Mandelbaum -Mr. Baradar -recently captured head of Taliban intelligence in Afghsnistan -asked for a tape recorder and has been spilling his guts to western and Pakistani intelligence agents - "And he has not stopped crying" said Moishe Pipick -head interrogator,

Monday, February 15, 2010

$ 8.50 Per Hour and FREE Rooms at Holiday Express?

My young friend just got a job at the brand new local Holiday Express - she was very excited about getting a job at the front desk earning $8.50 an hour:

But I suddenly realized -"Holy Shit! -the average unhighly skilled American worker is totally doomed!" Oh and this is someone who makes a wonderful appearance -has two years of college -is bright - is literate -and a strong communicator"

I got to thinking about My first job in 1963 where i was paid $125 dollars per week. -- AND - i just discovered that a 1963 dollar is worth $7.10 in 2010 dollars figuring inflation:

SO -my friends $340 paycheck should be roughly $800 if it were keeping up with just basic inflation VS. 1963 -but that's only part of this horrible story if we now look at what you could buy for your bucks back in 1963:

Cost Of Living 1963
How Much things cost in 1963
Yearly Inflation Rate
USA 1.24%
Yearly Inflation Rate
UK 1.8%
Year End Close Dow Jones Industrial Average
762
Average Cost of new house
$12,650.00
Average Income per year
$5,807.00
Gas per Gallon
29 cents
Average Cost of a new car
$3,233.00
Loaf of bread
22 cents
Bedroom Air Conditioner
$149.95

So you all know what all this stuff costs now -and even if my friend was getting paid a reasonable salary in terms of the inflation since 1963 she wouldn't be able to buy shit without going into deep debt (and of course credit has now vanished) - But with her roughly $290 weekly take home salary from the big sports at Holiday Express -well - need i say more about her prospects for a bountiful existence?

Oh -and while we're at it - let's take a look at the minimum wage situation facing all those folks who don't have the prescence or skills of my "highly paid" young friend: (if you don't know that was sarcasm stop reading and kill yourself)

This December 1st will mark nine years and three months since the last increase. Thus, unless Congress acts quickly, so that a federal minimum wage increase is actually put into place before then, on December 2nd the federal minimum wage will have remained at the same level for the longest period since it was established

The lack of action on the minimum wage has led to a dramatic erosion in its value.

  • The minimum wage now equals only 31 percent of the average wage for private sector, nonsupervisory workers. This is the lowest share since at least the end of World War II.
  • Since September 1997, the purchasing power of the minimum wage has deteriorated by 20 percent. After adjusting for inflation, the value of the minimum wage is at its lowest level since 1955.

The decline in the value of the minimum wage is part and parcel of a disturbing feature of the recovery from the 2001 recession: its failure to significantly improve the well-being of most workers. Instead, the benefits of our impressive productivity growth rates have largely flowed to those at the top of the income and wealth scale.

Oh well -like i said at the beginning --"Holy Shit! -the average unhighly skilled American worker is totally doomed!"


You know -another sign of the impending doom struck home when the father of my young friend said "And she gets free rooms at Holiday Expresses all over the World"


"Where in the fuck do you think she is going? -She's a fucking pauper you moron!"

Hey -but the real story here is that the Holiday Express folks give these jobs to kids like my friend who is livin with her boyfriend's parents while finishing college at night -BUT - remember when these jobs went to adults who could support their families comfortably with those salaries back then when there was a fair distribution of the goodies in America (and their wives stayed home with the kids)

Gone forever -next up - I"M afraid - Class Warfare!





Sunday, February 14, 2010

How The Church Tried To Ruin Valentine's Day

On this day of amative imaginings and billet- doux - I thought you might be interested in the Pagan provenance of Valentine's day --"Lupercalia"


"The Lupercalia festival was in honor of the She-Wolf who suckled the infant orphans, Romulus and Remus, the founders of Rome. Explaining the name of the festival, Lupercalia, which translates out into "Wolf Festival." The festival was celebrated near the cave of Lupercal on the Palatine (where Rome was founded, see Livy, Book I), to expiate and purify new life in the Spring.

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The festival began with the sacrifice by the Luperci (or the flamen dialis) of two male goats and a dog. Next two patricianyoung Luperci were led to the altar, to be anointed on their foreheads with the sacrificial blood, which was wiped off the bloody knife with wool soaked in milk, after which they were expected to smile and laugh; the smearing of the forehead with blood probably refers to human sacrifice originally practised at the festival.

The sacrificial feast followed, after which the Luperci cut thongs from the skins of the victims, which were called Februa, dressed themselves in the skins of the sacrificed goats -- and then everyone ran around fornicating and drinking and dancing until they dropped!

This looked like too much fun to the Ancient Queer Priests so they turned it into a sappy, lovey dovey religious farce - BUT!

Little did they know that healthy modern folks of all ages would return to their Lupercalic roots - only with different outfits and bling.

This is a sure sign that the rule of the Queer Priests is waning - but we gotta bring back the goats and she wolves!

Happy Lupercalia everyone!


Thursday, February 11, 2010

Dwarfs And Battle Pigs To Fight Taliban

Defense Secretary William Gates ,has proposed revolutionary new battle tactics to the Joint Chiefs Of Staff -- For winning the war in Afghanistan:


Under his plan a full battle Brigade of "Dwarfs" would be used to patrol and control The toughest Taliban strongholds, and they would be accompanied by specially trained "Battle Pigs".

He stated "Dwarfs are much harder to target and can move more easily through the narrow canyons and mountain trails of the Taliban strongholds. -- AND - the "Battle Pigs" will be very effective (they are much smarter than German Shepherds with a much keener sense of smell) -- and any Muslim insurgent bitten by a Pig cannot enter Paradise. (also the Dwarfs will be armed with special Pig Bullets)"


"Any Muslim killed with a bullet smeared in Pig grease will wake up in the West Hollywood Gay Pride Parade - instead of in a swimming pool full of Virgins - Oh and we are also going to bury any body parts we find leftover from a suicide attacker's remains -and bury it in Pig Shit -So the Paradise thing is definitely over for these vicious morons!"Said Secretary Gates.

Gates concluded: "I have to admit i got this idea from Israeli Defense Chief -Lieutenant General Moishe Pipick - who said that the IDF is considering spraying Pig Manure all across Iran if they don't stop enriching Uranium -and maybe even using Pig Gas and spraying them all into Islamic hell."


Monday, February 08, 2010

Sarah Palin - Demagogue

Demagogy (also demagoguery) (Ancient Greek δημαγωγία, from δῆμος dÄ“mos "people" and ἄγεινagein "to lead") is a strategy for gaining political power by appealing to the prejudices, emotions, fearsand expectations of the public—typically via impassioned rhetoric and propaganda, and often using nationalist, populist or religious themes.


  • The early 20th century American social critic and humorist H. L. Mencken, known for his "definitions" of terms, defined a demagogue as "one who will preach doctrines he knows to be untrue to men he knows to be idiots."

Though this definition emphasizes the use of lying and falsehoods, skilled demagogues often need to use only special emphasis by which an uncritical listener will be led to draw the desired conclusion themselves. Moreover, a demagogue may well believe his or her own arguments (for example, there are good reasons to assume that Adolf Hitler--certainly one of the most successful demagogues in history—sincerely believed his own anti-Jewish diatribes).


What we ALL need is to critically observe Sarah Palin communicating her positions -in some depth - on the critical issues of the day with say a David Gregory or George Stephanoupolis - or Jim Lehrer.


Performing her demagoguery) to a group of Tea Party idiots is just like spreading manure -it may stick -but it just plain stinks!

Saturday, February 06, 2010

Read Em And Weep!

In my younger poker playing days there was an expression:

When after the betting was concluded and you called your opponent -he might lay down his cards - confident that Four Aces (or whatever) was a sure fire pot taker and declare "Read em and weep!"

Well - I'm no economist -and couldn't rationally explain the difference between a credit default swap and a wife swap -but I'm pretty sanguine about the fact that the priests of finance and economic and fiscal policy are either jerking us average schmucks chains pretty damn hard about what's ahead - What hand we're ACTUALLY holding - or they just DON"T get it!

Really --It didn't take an MBA from Harvard to realize that pre the collapse - folks were living in a consumption trance fueled by their ever expanding home equity and retail credit -and a "tomorrow will never come" mindset.

If any of the wealthy and accomplished and powerful folks who have the secret handshake between one another (the one you learn at Harvard and Yale and Goldman Sachs ) EVER stepped into a Blarney Stone - brought their corned beef sandwich from the steam table over to the bar - ordered a double Dewar's with a Guinness chaser -and JUST LISTENED:

They would have heard the harbingers of the financial collapse as clear as the closing bell of The NY Stock Exchange "All the F'in work is goin overseas - if i miss one goddamn paycheck it's all over! -We've maxed out on the credit cards - spent all the home equity dough -and we've got NOTHING to back us up -And - there's no student loan dough-but what's the diff -there's no jobs for the kids anyway when they graduate in debt up to their eyeballs to the loan company - AND - to the Chinese for life with the deficit -AND i already got my daughter back livin in the garage." AND AND AND:

"Little Johnny needs a knee operation but the insurance company says it's a precondition -and my boss says that soon he can't afford to pay for full coverage."

AND that was what was in play across this great "buy to get high" land BEFORE the shit hit the fan -AND there's NO more easy consumer credit -mortgages are one big upside down cake -the European Union is sucking wind along with everyone but China - The Great Bottomless Reservoir of TBills is leaking like a sieve - State Support Services soon will be non existent AND AND AND:

Productivity is going through the roof as businesses realize they never needed that many workers any way -and "if we need more we'll hire temporaries!" AND AND AND:

Soon Health Care will be 25% of the economy and since the Republicans now have found their footing (they think) - By becoming deficit hawks there will be no reform and limited additional jobs spending just when we need it most - SO - the recession is two steps away from going into collapse mode again. AND AND AND:

Forget about all the stuff like cap and trade and meaningful financial and education reform and entitlement reform (now there's a ship tht's sinking fast)-AND infra structure reform -

There is NO reform when everyone is trying to protect their asses from an electorate one step away from their pitchforks and torches - Even more panicked than their political leaders (oxymoron here)

Soooo - "Read EM And Weep" -Unemployment will hit twelve percent (thirty percent when you factor in the other REAL unemployment indicators) - And- will stay there indefinitely - HUGE Ongoing Mortgage defaults will bring on another financial collapse worldwide -Fueled by free money the big players will continue to enrich themselves with impunity -AND - the stock market will eventually collapse along with the dollar - AND AND AND

The folks will take to the streets and the barricades - Teapots Aboil - and it's not gonna be pretty -or safe - Especially for the rich and powerful who really aren't used to being inconvenienced by all their STUFF being carted away by the Peasant Class AND AND AND:

Just about then - when everyone's eyes are off the big ball - guess whose coming to dinner? (a clue - they're not from Sweden))

"Read EM and Weep!"

Friday, February 05, 2010

USA Is Brutally Divided By Intellect

No one wants to say it out loud -but the political divisions which are presently creating a logjam of critical mass on the river of progress in this country - are created by the sheer ignorance of the core Republican Party base.

Whether it's a health or science or social issue -health reform or global warming -or education or election reform - or fiscal oversight -or taxation or even intelligent deficit reduction:

The gun toting -bible belting -homo and xenophobic -anti evolution - anti women's rights crowd is making it's last stand abetted by their lawmakers who haven't got the vision or intellect to see and know what is critically essential for the growth and sustenance of this Nation.

But mainly they don't have the guts to lead their Fox News fired up ideological rabid core -red state redneck constituencies in a positive and progressive direction.

It's a goddamn shame because we have a president with all the necessary character and wisdom to lead us into a new era of prosperity and a kinder and safer world for everyone.

This is gonna be one hell of a fight -i just hope there are enough bright and aware and energized Americans to take us forward into a political zeitgeist where there is no room for a Sarah Palin or her ilk to factor against the bright light of real progress.

I have never seen so many bright and competent and balanced and mature individuals on a presidential team -it amazes to watch a Hillary Clinton or a David Axelrod or Bill Gates or anyone of Obama's team communicate about the core issues facing them and us:

And then to hear the shrill ignorant partisan ravings of a John Baynor or his cohorts -whose only mission is to strategize this collective positive wisdom into a screed for energizing their ignorant conservative constituencies.

No insight or clarified reasoning required -just hit the buzz words - just tell em what they want to hear!

Dispensing THE most horrible drugs of all drugs - ignorance and fear and retrogression!

Thursday, February 04, 2010

Japanese Demand Toyota Board Kill Themselves

Japan's leadership with the full backing of the general population has demanded that Toyota's entire board of directors commit Hari kari in the ancient Samurai tradition of maintaining complete honor in the face of defeat or disgrace -by cutting their bowels open -and then being mercifully beheaded with a Samurai sword by a trusted assistant.

'The Toyota leadership has fucked up the reputation of a great National symbol and provider of wealth and sustinence to the Nation and they have completely fucked up the handling of the whole mess!" said Inguchi Tushymoto Japan's Prime Minister.

"Only cleansing by the ultimate and heroic Samurai tradition can restore faith in Toyota among our Foreign markets - and among the Japanese people"

A poll released early today from the Pew National Research Institute showed that 83% of Americans would respond favorably towards Toyota if the board of directors killed themselves.

But Moishe Pipick president of thje National Auto safety Conference announced today; "Early this morning Mrs. Rachel Ginsberg of Soux falls , North Dakota was driving along with her five children and the steering wheel of her brand new Toyota Land Cruiser came off in her hands -she was saved by a herd of Bison grazing alongside the highway who cushioned the crash impact"

Pipick continued; "There is growing evidence that Toyota vehicles are literally "falling apart" slowly but surely -and those Japs can start commiting suicide wholesale -but it ain;t gonna work"

Arnold Goldblum an expert in automotive engineering and corporate espionage said today; "Hey -wake the fuck up everybody -This is the Chinks sabatoging the Japs as they prepare to launch their new automotive lines - and dominate the industry -and hurt the Japs who they hate!"

He concluded; "And the Chinks hate the Gooks more than the Japs so if i were driving a Kia right now? -I wouldn't!"

Wow! -thank God we owe them our shirts! ( Speaking of which soon there will be American laundries "Johnny go take the laundry down to the Jews"

Tuesday, February 02, 2010

Evangelists Turn Jesus Christ Into A Gang Banger

Can't get the young morons to join the old morons in Church ? - Let's try violent behavior!

Flock Is Now a Fight Team in Some Ministries

Fred R. Conrad/The New York Times

Diego Sanchez before a bout in Memphis.

Published: February 1, 2010

MEMPHIS — In the back room of a theater on Beale Street, John Renken, 42, a pastor, recently led a group of young men in prayer.

Fred R. Conrad/The New York Times

Leonard Lane, left, fighting for Xtreme Ministries, a church that doubles as a martial arts academy.

Fred R. Conrad/The New York Times

Before the Cage Assault bout in Memphis, Mr. Lane got his hands taped by Pastor John Renken of Xtreme Ministries.

Readers' Comments

“Father, we thank you for tonight,” he said. “We pray that we will be a representation of you.”

An hour later, a member of his flock who had bowed his head was now unleashing a torrent of blows on an opponent, and Mr. Renken was offering guidance that was not exactly prayerful.

“Hard punches!” he shouted from the sidelines of a martial arts event called Cage Assault. “Finish the fight! To the head! To the head!”

The young man was a member of a fight team at Xtreme Ministries, a small church near Nashville that doubles as a mixed martial artsacademy. Mr. Renken, who founded the church and academy, doubles as the team’s coach. The school’s motto is “Where Feet, Fist and Faith Collide.”

Mr. Renken’s ministry is one of a small but growing number of evangelical churches that have embraced mixed martial arts — a sport with a reputation for violence and blood that combines kickboxing, wrestling and other fighting styles — to reach and convert young men, whose church attendance has been persistently low. Mixed martial arts events have drawn millions of television viewers, and one was the top pay-per-view event in 2009.

Recruitment efforts at the churches, which are predominantly white, involve fight night television viewing parties and lecture series that use ultimate fighting to explain how Christ fought for what he believed in. Other ministers go further, hosting or participating in live events.

The goal, these pastors say, is to inject some machismo into their ministries — and into the image of Jesus — in the hope of making Christianity more appealing. “Compassion and love — we agree with all that stuff, too,” said Brandon Beals, 37, the lead pastor atCanyon Creek Church outside of Seattle. “But what led me to find Christ was that Jesus was a fighter.”

The outreach is part of a larger and more longstanding effort on the part of some ministers who fear that their churches have become too feminized, promoting kindness and compassion at the expense of strength and responsibility.

“The man should be the overall leader of the household,” said Ryan Dobson, 39, a pastor and fan of mixed martial arts who is the son of James C. Dobson, the founder of Focus on the Family, a prominent evangelical group. “We’ve raised a generation of little boys.”

These pastors say the marriage of faith and fighting is intended to promote Christian values, quoting verses like “fight the good fight of faith” from Timothy 6:12. Several put the number of churches taking up mixed martial arts at roughly 700 of an estimated 115,000 white evangelical churches in America. The sport is seen as a legitimate outreach tool by the youth ministry affiliate of the National Association of Evangelicals, which represents more than 45,000 churches.

“You have a lot of troubled young men who grew up without fathers, and they’re wandering and they’re hopeless and they’re lousy dads themselves and they’re just lost,” said Paul Robie, 54, a pastor at South Mountain Community Church in Draper, Utah.

Fighting as a metaphor has resonated with some young men.

“I’m fighting to provide a better quality of life for my family and provide them with things that I didn’t have growing up,” said Mike Thompson, 32, a former gang member and student of Mr. Renken’s who until recently had struggled with unemployment and who fights under the nickname the Fury. “Once I accepted Christ in my life,” Mr. Thompson said, “I realized that a person can fight for good.”

Nondenominational evangelical churches have a long history of using popular culture — rock music, skateboarding and even yoga— to reach new followers. Yet even among more experimental sects, mixed martial arts has critics.

“What you attract people to Christ with is also what you need to get people to stay,” saidEugene Cho, 39, a pastor at Quest Church, an evangelical congregation in Seattle. “I don’t live for the Jesus who eats red meat, drinks beer and beats on other men.”

Robert Brady, 49, the executive vice president of a conservative evangelical group, the Alliance of Confessing Evangelicals, agreed, saying that the mixed martial arts motif of evangelism “so easily takes away from the real focus of the church, which is the Gospel.” Many black churches have chosen not to participate.

Almost a decade ago, mixed martial arts was seen as a blood sport without rules or regulation. It was banned in nearly every state and denounced by politicians like Senator John McCain, Republican of Arizona.

Over the past five years, however, because of shrewd marketing by the Ultimate Fighting Championship, the sport’s premier brand, mixed martial arts has become mainstream. Today the sport is legal and regulated in 42 states.

Its proponents point to a study by researchers at the Johns Hopkins University School of Medicine showing that mixed martial arts participants suffer a lower rate of knockouts than boxers.

Over the past year and a half, a subculture has evolved, with Christian mixed martial arts clothing brands like Jesus Didn’t Tap (in the sport, “tap” means to give up) and Christian social networking Web sites likeAnointedfighter.com.

Roughly 100 young men, many sporting shaved heads and tattoos, attend fight parties at Canyon Creek near Seattle, watching bouts on the church’s four big-screen televisions. Vendors hustle hot dogs and “Predestined to Fight” T-shirts. About half are not church members but heard about the parties through friends, said Mr. Beals, who is known as theFight Pastor.

Men ages 18 to 34 are absent from churches, some pastors said, because churches have become more amenable to women and children. “We grew up in a church that had pastel pews,” said Tom Skiles, 37, the pastor of Spirit of St. Louis Church in Arnold, Mo. “The men fell asleep.”

In focusing on the toughness of Christ, evangelical leaders are harking back to a similar movement in the early 1900s, historians say, when women began entering the work force. Proponents of this so-called muscular Christianity advocated weight lifting as a way for Christians to express their masculinity.

“This whole generation is raised on the idea that they’re in a culture war for the heart and soul of America,” said Stephen Prothero, a professor of religion at Boston University.

Paul Burress, 35, a chaplain and fight coachat Victory Baptist Church in Rochester, said mixed martial arts had given his students a chance to work on body, soul and spirit. “Win or lose, we represent Jesus,” he said. “And we win most of the time.”

But on that cold night in Memphis, Mr. Renken, the pastor from Xtreme Ministries, watched as two of his three fighters were beaten, one emerging with a broken ankle.

Another, Jesse Johnson, 20, a potential convert, was subdued in a chokehold and decided not to return home with the other church members after his bout. He stayed in Memphis, drinking and carousing with friends along Beale Street, this city’s raucous, neon-lighted strip of bars.

“Where Feet, Fist and Faith Collide.”


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