xmlns:og='http://ogp.me/ns#'. The Digibandit: Jul 28, 2015

Tuesday, July 28, 2015

Jonas Etcher is a Bible Belting Hero! - We Need More Rednecks cutting off their Penis'"




 the girls are really gonna miss his penis




http://www.sickchirpse.com/georgia-man-cuts-off-penis-stop-masturbatin/


Doctors normally would have attempted to reattach the penis but Etcher had thrown his dismembered penis to a neighbor dog who had eaten most of it.
“I had told him that maybe we could have had somebody build a metal glove with razor sharp spikes on the palm and fingers that could have been permanently padlocked to his penis and prevented him from masturbating,” Ellen said.
“But he said that would have “been itchy.” So I guess he thought sawing his thing off was the better solution. I am proud of him from trying to lead a life of purity, but now he’s going to have to go on disability as he won’t be able to work at Applebee’s while he recovers.”
Doctors said he will make a full recovery but will now be required to wear a catheter and urine bag.
“He’s really been struggling with masturbation,” Ellen Etcher told WRDW. “He knows it’s against Jesus, but has been self-pleasuring up to a dozen times a day. He can’t seem to find a girl to get his sex urges out on… we’ve tried Match.com, Craigslist.”
Etcher, 52, believed he would go to hell if he didn’t stop masturbating. So he took drastic measures by cutting off what he called his “sinful part.”
 Jonas will have his penis in heaven
Doctors normally would have attempted to reattach the penis but Etcher had thrown his dismembered penis to a neighbor dog who had eaten most of it.
“I had told him that maybe we could have had somebody build a metal glove with razor sharp spikes on the palm and fingers that could have been permanently padlocked to his penis and prevented him from masturbating,” Ellen said.
“But he said that would have “been itchy.” So I guess he thought sawing his thing off was the better solution. I am proud of him from trying to lead a life of purity, but now he’s going to have to go on disability as he won’t be able to work at Applebee’s while he recovers.”
Doctors said he will make a full recovery but will now be required to wear a catheter and urine bag.

 men without their dicks would be a big improvement here

Jonas said"It's ok -I'll have more time with my guns.


Donald Thump - “Your fucking doctor has ruined me!” Trump cried.



After a painful scalp reduction surgery to remove a bald spot, Donald Trump confronted his then-wife, who had previously used the same plastic surgeon.
“Your fucking doctor has ruined me!” Trump cried.
What followed was a “violent assault” . Donald held back Ivana’s arms and began to pull out fistfuls of hair from her scalp, as if to mirror the pain he felt from his own operation. He tore off her clothes and unzipped his pants.
“Then he jams his penis inside her for the first time in more than sixteen months. Ivana is terrified… It is a violent assault,” Hurt writes. “According to versions she repeats to some of her closest confidantes, ‘he raped me.’”
Following the incident, Ivana ran upstairs, hid behind a locked door, and remained there “crying for the rest of night.” When she returned to the master bedroom in the morning, he was there.
“You’re talking about the front-runner for the GOP, presidential candidate, as well as a private individual who never raped anybody. And, of course, understand that by the very definition, you can't rape your spouse.”
“As she looks in horror at the ripped-out hair scattered all over the bed, he glares at her and asks with menacing casualness: ‘Does it hurt?’”