xmlns:og='http://ogp.me/ns#'. The Digibandit: May 25, 2010

Tuesday, May 25, 2010

Poor - Fat - Velveeta Eaters Should be Profiled

Forget profiling illegals you Arizonan's! -A new study by the The National Research Institute has conclusively determined that :

"Folks who are poor and fat and eat Velveeta cheese - represent most of the social dysfunction in our society" -said Dr. Moishe Pipick -The Research Institutes president today - from their worldwide headquarters in Berne, Switzerland.

Dr Pipick related the studies key findings as follows:

"These folks commit 38% more misdemeanors - 28% more felonious assaults -56% more incidents of spousal and child abuse - and 78% of the men own guns and are avid hunters and have IQ levels that are grossly marginal."

"Furthermore" - he went on - "88% are white conservative Christians - 95% have seen a UFO and believe in Creationism - 46% live in the deep south or Texas - and over 72% have never experienced oral sex and have sex (with humans) less than eight times a year"

"And as suspected" -- He stated - "84% are alcoholics and drug users and regularly listen to Rush Limbaugh -and are in the lower 5% socio economic range"

Dr. Pipick concluded "So it's vividly apparent that our social profiling attention should be directed at Poor -Fat -Velveeta cheese eaters."

"Forget the illegals and Muslims!"