xmlns:og='http://ogp.me/ns#'. The Digibandit: Jun 10, 2007

Sunday, June 10, 2007

Bible Park USA Will Become America's Vatican

Christianity is about to realize it's true potential!

Armon Bar-Tur, managing director of SafeHarbor Holding, a New York company that is developing Bible Park USA, said the project was revealed to officials months before it was ready. misconceptions and “silly rumors” have resulted, he said.

The park, described in promotional material as “edutainment,” would cost $150 million to $200 million. With a Galilean village as its centerpiece, one side of the park would present Old Testament stories like the Exodus; the other side would have New Testament stories like Jesus’ birth and crucifixion. The only displays in writing would be excerpts from Scripture, and parts of the park would be reserved for Bible study.

"This is the perfect way to capture the deep spiritual connection that Christianity has developed with modern folks all over the globe," said Pastor Calvin Butts of Murfreesboro, Tennessee --where the park will be situated.

He said that; Anyone who has been to the Mall of America and Disneyland knows that the only thing missing is a good old fashioned dose of themed Scripture! "And these folks from up in hymietown really know how to get a message across!"
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They're planning a huge scary rolly coaster called 'The Hairy Mary' and their will be a water park called "Capsize and Baptize" and a ride which has been called the most exciting since Black Flags came out with Batman -- It's called 'Crucifixion'! -- where riders will be strapped upside down to crosses and spun around at super high speeds and are left hanging there for an hour while Hasidic Jew's chanting in Yiddish dance around them.

God and Christ and The Apostles will be wandering throughout the park -- just like Mickey mouse and the Dwarfs at Disneyland and there is speculation that there will also be "Pope Goofy" -- and one of the main attractions which has been sold out for the next five years: ---- You guessed it!

A state of the art 3d digital manger where you can witness the immaculate conception of Jesus Christ -- for only twenty bucks!

To be continued: