xmlns:og='http://ogp.me/ns#'. The Digibandit: Nov 13, 2012

Tuesday, November 13, 2012

Ann Romney says Mitt Attempted Suicide By Hanging With $500 Hermes Tie

  Ann Romney told the police;" I had the cook make Mittens his favorite Caviar Omelete to calm him down after this devastating loss - i went over to our private Chapel and prayed for a while -then i went to the stable to play with my horses and then over to our spa to get a manicure and pedicure - and then i had my trainer give me a nice rubdown and then our Butler came running in screaming that Mittens was hanging from a $300,00 Chippendale chair in his game room by a $500 Hermes necktie and that he had cut him down and he was blue and his hair was messed up and he was mumbling:

 He is a weak Mormon Wussy
"Those fucking Mexicans and Queers and Kikes and young hooligans just cost me the election - why? why? why? did i ever listen to those Redneck fucking Tea Party Christian Morons led by those two ignorant cunts Bachman and Palin and that wop Santorum."

"I can't take it! -The Mormon God has forsaken me for that Muslim Nigger!"

Ann continued;"WELL - Mittens seems to have completely lost his bearings and this is just too much for me so i'm taking my kids and thirty nine grandchildren away on our yacht to The Greek Islands until Mittens gets his balls back in order -and -it better be soon or he's on his own and i know Bain capitol does NOT want him back so MAYBE HE CAN JUST BECOME A FUCKING MISSIONARY IN THE CONGO OR SOME OTHER NIGGER HELL HOLE!"