Thursday, July 30, 2015
Tuesday, July 28, 2015
Jonas Etcher is a Bible Belting Hero! - We Need More Rednecks cutting off their Penis'"
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| the girls are really gonna miss his penis |
http://www.sickchirpse.com/georgia-man-cuts-off-penis-stop-masturbatin/
Doctors normally would have attempted to reattach the penis but Etcher had thrown his dismembered penis to a neighbor dog who had eaten most of it.
“I had told him that maybe we could have had somebody build a metal glove with razor sharp spikes on the palm and fingers that could have been permanently padlocked to his penis and prevented him from masturbating,” Ellen said.
“But he said that would have “been itchy.” So I guess he thought sawing his thing off was the better solution. I am proud of him from trying to lead a life of purity, but now he’s going to have to go on disability as he won’t be able to work at Applebee’s while he recovers.”
Doctors said he will make a full recovery but will now be required to wear a catheter and urine bag.
“He’s really been struggling with masturbation,” Ellen Etcher told WRDW. “He knows it’s against Jesus, but has been self-pleasuring up to a dozen times a day. He can’t seem to find a girl to get his sex urges out on… we’ve tried Match.com, Craigslist.”
Etcher, 52, believed he would go to hell if he didn’t stop masturbating. So he took drastic measures by cutting off what he called his “sinful part.”
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| Jonas will have his penis in heaven |
Doctors normally would have attempted to reattach the penis but Etcher had thrown his dismembered penis to a neighbor dog who had eaten most of it.
“I had told him that maybe we could have had somebody build a metal glove with razor sharp spikes on the palm and fingers that could have been permanently padlocked to his penis and prevented him from masturbating,” Ellen said.
“But he said that would have “been itchy.” So I guess he thought sawing his thing off was the better solution. I am proud of him from trying to lead a life of purity, but now he’s going to have to go on disability as he won’t be able to work at Applebee’s while he recovers.”
Doctors said he will make a full recovery but will now be required to wear a catheter and urine bag.
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| men without their dicks would be a big improvement here |
Jonas said"It's ok -I'll have more time with my guns.
Donald Thump - “Your fucking doctor has ruined me!” Trump cried.
After a painful scalp reduction surgery to remove a bald spot, Donald Trump confronted his then-wife, who had previously used the same plastic surgeon.
“Your fucking doctor has ruined me!” Trump cried.
What followed was a “violent assault” . Donald held back Ivana’s arms and began to pull out fistfuls of hair from her scalp, as if to mirror the pain he felt from his own operation. He tore off her clothes and unzipped his pants.
“Then he jams his penis inside her for the first time in more than sixteen months. Ivana is terrified… It is a violent assault,” Hurt writes. “According to versions she repeats to some of her closest confidantes, ‘he raped me.’”
Following the incident, Ivana ran upstairs, hid behind a locked door, and remained there “crying for the rest of night.” When she returned to the master bedroom in the morning, he was there.
“You’re talking about the front-runner for the GOP, presidential candidate, as well as a private individual who never raped anybody. And, of course, understand that by the very definition, you can't rape your spouse.”
“As she looks in horror at the ripped-out hair scattered all over the bed, he glares at her and asks with menacing casualness: ‘Does it hurt?’”
Sunday, July 26, 2015
Jim Jeffries Skewers The Guntards
The guilty "Not quite men Male" Gun Murder dilemma!.
Guns don't kill people! - The "Not quite men Males" who resist reasonable Gun Control & Allow Sociopaths access to guns Who then kill People - Kill People.
Ergo - "Those not quite men Males" who resist reasonable Gun Control are accessories to murder!
From Trump to Hitler - Just Turn off The Electricity for One Week
If the rabble can be pissed off enough by stuff to support a defective human being like Donald Trump just imagine a week without:
Cold beer
TLC
Lottery Tickets
Etc.
Friday, July 24, 2015
Laugh at an Asshole AND They are soon Diminished and then Destroyed!
My Insight for Today - Intelligent Scorn will save Humanity
As the world population becomes richer and freer it will become a gigantic universal audience for intelligent sarcasm/satire.
One big Daily Show where nothing skewers and isolates the universal schmucks like penetrating ribald scorn irony and satire!
And NO ONE does this better than the West which is how they will ultimately destroy the male beasts that have been preying on and feasting on the weak rabble since the dawn of time.
Courage and strength and action will derive from the simple awareness of how fucking obtuse and schmucky are the morons who pose as macho tyrants and demagogues and political leaders.
Just ask any enlightened Baby Boomer or ANY Gen x or Millenial in America about the GOP!
Laugh at an asshole and they are soon diminished and then destroyed!
Wednesday, July 22, 2015
New Research -Get Married Have kids - Get fat with a Mental Case for a Wife and Mother.
| Dementia in women worsens about twice as fast as in men, researchers report. |
| And a study suggests that many men gain three to five pounds when they become fathers. Sooooooo! Get Married Have kids - Get fat with a Mental Case for a Wife and Mother. |
Tuesday, July 21, 2015
Marriage is a "Sacred Cow" - Like Patriotism and Religion
The only issues to be resolved are ones of legality.
Who owes what -who gets what when and if -etc!
Any and all relationships can and should be comprehensively embraced with legal parameters between consenting adults.
Problems only arise because of some outdated myth about "Marriage" being "Sacred". It is no more sacred than any pre-nup or mortgage contract!
OR any other "Sacred Cow"
"
Oh and it does not work most of the time!
Monday, July 20, 2015
The Chinese are The Ant People! -VERY scary!
Dawn over a residential complex in Yanjiao.
Commuting for the Ant People -The Chinese are very scary!
"Around 6:30, their adult children arrive. The line, now snaking down the street, has become an hourlong wait. People cut in, and a shoving match breaks out. But the retirees have saved their children this ordeal. When the next bus pulls up, the young adults take their parents’ places at the head of the line and board first, settling into coveted seats for a 25-mile ride that can take up to three hours."
Saturday, July 18, 2015
The NRA's "Not quite men Male" Gun Murder dilemma!.
Guns don't kill people! - The "Not quite men Males" who resist reasonable Gun Control & Allow Sociopaths access to guns Who then kill People - Kill People.
Ergo - "Those not quite men Males" who resist reasonable Gun Control are accessories to murder!
Friday, July 17, 2015
PCP - Angel Dust as a Philosophy for Living Well
The Human mind desires/ requires
Pleasure (fun and relaxation) Complexity (mind excercize -challenges) Peace ( harmony with nature)
(combined with balance and discipline )
PCP
Natural Angel Dust
dave,nels@yahoo.com
philosopher king
Thursday, July 16, 2015
TLC announces "The Lives of Attichus Finch"
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| The Japaneses Are Killing My Friends |
As the psychoanalysis of a purely literary creation drones on endlessly in the media we see how consumed by our reality show cultural. zeitgeist we are.
Atticus Finch steps out of the authors imagination and LIVES among us!
He's doing literary analysis on Fox News along with his gig on TLC!
Next up Hamlet? Where would he have stood on Brown vs Board of Education?
Captain Ahab weighs in on Japan's slaughtering of Whales!
What absolute inanity! Boo Hoo Hoo - i want my earlier Atticus.
I want all of my literary characters to leave the imaginary context of their narratives and be psychoanalyzed and then join The Karddashians and Honey BooBoo on TLC!
OH where's my Ritalin gone off to now?
Friday, July 10, 2015
Oxford World Dictionary Adds Bible Belting Religious Definitions - For Increased Clarity
Bibletards! synonym - Bibletardation!
definition (noun) - retardation from early child brainwashing and enhanced by morbid obesity
Bibletarded -adjective - Bibletarding -noun - Bibletardinglessley -adverb
Monday, July 06, 2015
Obama Announces - Fundamentalist Christian Brains To Be Mapped
President Obama on Tuesday will announce a broad new research initiative, starting with $100 million in 2016, to invent and refine new technologies to understand the how's and why's -the unique functioning of - Fundamentalist Christian/Redneck thought processing.
The President announced - " Now we know these folks are not all there!"
"They oppose all attempts to move along the highway of human progress and are stuck in their Bronze Age Biblical Mentality -BUT -we are gonna help them -we are gonna give them an opportunity to wake up and smell The Roses -like these beautiful roses in our garden here all round us today."
"Oh and ESPECIALLY You Gun nuts out there!"
"Oh and ESPECIALLY You Gun nuts out there!"
A senior administration scientist compared the new initiative to the Human Genome Project, in that it is directed at a problem that has seemed insoluble up to now: the recording and mapping of brain circuits in action in an effort to “show how millions of brain cells interact. especially in the minds of these redneck Christian folks who we have always thought were just retarded by "early childhood brain washing" but now we are looking for deeper answers.
Brain researchers can now insert wires in the brain of animals, or sometimes human beings, to record the electrical activity of brain cells called neurons, as they communicate with each other so this technique should work well with these Christian Rednecks as they have much lower IQ's and smaller brains than most folks.
Wednesday, July 01, 2015
The Man Who Made Most American Kids Obese
The man who made most American Kids obese!Ralph H. Baer is the one who transformed sets you merely watched into screens that you could interact with and control.
His system was licensed to Magnavox, which began selling it as Odyssey in the summer of 1972, as the first home video game console. In 1973, he was granted Patent No. 3,728,480.
And from that came the PlayStation, the Xbox, the Wii and a video game industry that has about $100 billion in annual sales.
He did get a lot of help from Obese Adults!
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