Lesbian Love Making Misread by NSA -Homeland Security Arrests Lesbo Couple in Humboldt, CA. 

Esther and Miriam Applebaum - two married lesbians in Humboldt, CA. were having a nice quiet night of lovemaking when they heard the whirring of a Helicoptor and about 5 minutes later armed personnel of the Homeland Security Forces had them both handcuffed to a radiator in their bedroom because the NSA heard the following audio exchange from their computers in Nevada:

"Oh Oh that's so good Miriam -oh oh that is so perfect --NOW Miriam! Now! - Give it to me - - ok ok i am ready

Give Me The Rocket booster -NOW!!!"

"At that moment we heard a loud buzzing noise" said NSA technician Omar Farid and then; 

"Oh yes! -YE-ESS! - i am LAUNCHED!! -OH my God Esther!!!"

 what are you guys doing here?

"And that's when we sent in Homeland Security not knowing that it was just Miriam inserting a Dildo into Esther's bung hole -We thought it was a rocket launcher attack on The Humboldt national Guard Command Center."

Moishe Pipick head of strategic coordination between NSA and HLS said; "We are very sorry for this mistaken intrusion ( hehheh) and we have offered the gals an all expense paid weekend in las Vegas"

Louis Mandelbaum of Mandelbaum -Schwartz - Goldstein - Meyrowitz and Goldenberg Attorneys at law said;

"These lesbos will be millionaires when we are through!"

Posted 8th July 2013 by dave nelson

  

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Bill Clinton Overheard Expressing His Sexual Frustration - Will get Hookers Supplied!

"I love Hillary but let's face it i wouldn't fck her with your dick!" said Bill to an unidentified friend  in a Chappaqua NY tavern where they were having lunch and where he was overheard by the waitress.

The waitress spoke anonymously to the Westchester County Flyer,a local newspaper where the Clintons reside.

She said; "He told his friend that when Hillary is elected they have a deal where he can't fck any of the young chicks around the White House BUT the Secret Service will provide him with the best hookers in the world.

She also heard him tell his buddy; "Hillary can suck the chrome off a trailer hitch but i just can't fantasize my way around it any more -i mean it's like getting a blowjob from Madeline Albright!"

She then heard his buddy remark;"Just be careful Bill because you know their gonna be watching you like a Hawk!"

Bill replied, said the waitress; "Yeah those Bible belting repressed GOP assholes can't stand the thought of anyone having great sex!"

 And then he concluded;"And most of them are fatsos married to dogs! Woof! Woof!"