xmlns:og='http://ogp.me/ns#'. The Digibandit: Focus On Candidates Moves To Oral Sex Behavior -- Initial Evaluation below:

Monday, March 12, 2007

Focus On Candidates Moves To Oral Sex Behavior -- Initial Evaluation below:

The religious right has shifted it's concern from celibacy as it weighs in on the presidential primary race ; "thet have all been married two or three times and are basically a bunch of whore mongers so we have to shift the focus to some more relevent criteria." said Paul Dotson .head of The American Family Council -- a conservative group whose real name should be " TheRepressed and Constipated Hall of Fame."

"The next best way to evaluate a person's core qualification for the presidency -- after marriage fidelity - is their attitude towards Oral Sex! -- it goes to the very essence of a persons character and soul." he said.

Here,then, is their initial evaluation:

Barak Obama -- "Black men don't eat pussy -- it's disgusting and stinky"

John McCaine -- "Can't do it -- the torture injuries i received to my neck in Nam prevent me from muff diving -my wife has stood on a ladder but i still couldn't handle it."

Hillary Clinton -- "Well i personally can suck the chrome off a trailer hitch and Bill can suck a pussy dry -- but he doesn't inhale."

Rudy Giuliani -- "I love it but the pussy has to be totally clean shaven -- i do it myself so it's absolutely bald -- any stubble rubs my chin and i'm off the dive.

Mitt Romney -- Being a Mormon i eat about nineteen pussy's a week -- gotta keep em all happy -- but i have to gobble very efficiently or my jaw locks up after about twelve.

Chuck Hegel -- "I'd rather eat pussy than strangle Bush or Cheney -- that's how much i love it "

John Edwards -- "It's extremely nutritional and about the only thing that the average American can afford to do that's so pleasureable -- it's very cost effective --i would try to convince more blacks to suck pussy."

Newt Gingrich said;" Well finally wer'e starting to address the issues that affect the average American -- and just for the record - in case i enter the race -- i started eating pussy in grammar school -- and furthermore as President i would establish a "World Wide Pussy Eating Forum".-- "And -- if Muslims started eating pussy they could stop eating their children"