xmlns:og='http://ogp.me/ns#'. The Digibandit: Tony Snow Rats Out Cheney and Rumsfeld As Viscious Murderers

Tuesday, March 27, 2007

Tony Snow Rats Out Cheney and Rumsfeld As Viscious Murderers

White House Press Secretary,Tony Snow,after finding out that he has liver cancer yesterday.decided to come clean,and share his knowledge of what he has discovered about the Bush administration - "A Confession," as he put it.

He stated,"The American people have a right to know what a sleazy bunch of egomaniacal pricks and patological killers this bunch is! -- and let me first of all start out with quite a shocker! -- The President told me two weeks ago when i asked him if it wasn't time to admit that the Iraqui situation is hopeless"

"Tony" he said, "i would have pulled out long ago -- but Cheney and Rumsfeld told me straight out -- Mr. President, if you pull the plug on Iraq,we will have your wife and daughters tortured and raped and then burned alive after we force them to eat Barney -- then we will drown your Mother and Father in the icy waters up there in Maine,after first forcing Barbara to blow us -- then we will poison your brother Jeb and his whole family -- then we will violate and dismember Condi Rice -then we will take your best friend Karl Rove and cut out his tongue and pour gasoline down his throat and set it on fire- then we will skin alive your spik buddy,Attorney General Gonzales, and then we will sodomize Harriet Meyers and disembowel her --and we will make the whole thing look like Iraqi fanaticks did it."

I said,"Mr. President, they could never get away with it." and he replied, "Tony, they have killed and dislocated millions of helpless Iraquis with the way they fucked up this war -- and countless numbers of our own soldiers -killed and maimed for life. And the money,Tony, -- the money thats been wasted and the pockets that have been lined and Tony -- the Oil -these folks have so much blood on their hands and so much at stake --do you think their worried about a few more casualties?"

When reached for comment -- The President and Vice President and ex Defense Secretary Rumsfeld said basically the same thing; "Poor Tony The cancer has eaten his brains away,"