xmlns:og='http://ogp.me/ns#'. The Digibandit: Confessions To Homo Priests Don't Count Says Pope

Thursday, April 05, 2007

Confessions To Homo Priests Don't Count Says Pope

In an amazing revelation from Pope Benedick in the vatican yesterday; he asserted during an interview with the Catholic Times Magazine, that Catholics who gave their confessions to homo Priests would not be absolved from their sins -- he stated; "Priests who have been found outa to be queers have no standing with Goda, and any absolutions whicha they gave --are null and voida!"

Catholic Times Vatican reporter, Faba Nugatz asked the Pope; "But your emminence, these Catholic members of your flock had no way of knowing that they were confessing to homo's; and if their sins are serious and not forgiven -- they will go to Hell?" -- "Atsa tough titty!", replied the Pope. "Do you thinka God isa gonna accept the Confession from a Priest who just got finished sticking hisa cock into some young Altar boy?"

The reporter replied, "But your Holiness, i was talking to a man who confessed that he had sodomized and tortured his three year old son while he was under the influence of pain killers and alcohol due to post traumatic stress syndrome from serving in Iraq - as a life long Catholic he lived in constant fear of going to Hell,prior to his confession -- now what will he do when he hears your announcement that he will not be absolved from his venal sins?"

The Pope answered,"Well he is justa gonna have to commit his sins all over again and find, if he can, a non homo Priest -- and confess all over again, and then he will have a fresh start with Goda."

'But Your Emminence --that makes no sense! -- it's cruel and an abomination of Christ's gospel." The Pope concluded, "Well thatsa the Churcha for you -- happy Easter."