xmlns:og='http://ogp.me/ns#'. The Digibandit: Katie Couric To Get Head Of Walter Cronkite

Tuesday, June 26, 2007

Katie Couric To Get Head Of Walter Cronkite

Well -- showing a nipple didn't work! -- Turning her into the first "news dummy" by giving her a new voice didn't work! (all previously reported by the digibandit) -- now it's one last chance for Katie to survive her horrible ratings.

Les Moonbeam who hired her and who is in deep shit over that very costly decision, announced today: "We are going to put an exact replica of Walter Cronkite over Katie's head -- except for her tits and legs (her two best news assets) -- the audience will be looking at the most revered anchorman in the history of television !"

Mr. Cronkite said; "I am fortunate at this stage of my life to be able to make a contribution to news reporting even if I'm only a fake head attached to a dummy with hot tits and legs -- the American audience deserves nothing less --it is a perfect fit with their goofy lives."

Ms. Co uric announced; "I sincerely hope that giving some new head to the audience will bring them back to CBS news, and I'm so proud to be working with Walter Cronkite -- an iconic figure in journalism and a great human being ."

Les Moonbeam concluded; "This should give a great head (oops) start to our ratings going into the fall sweeps and if it works we might have Walter guest co-anchor with his head from time to time."