xmlns:og='http://ogp.me/ns#'. The Digibandit: Troops In Iraq Are Horniest Soldiers In History

Friday, May 11, 2007

Troops In Iraq Are Horniest Soldiers In History

Throughout the history of warfare (man's favorite pastime) and especially American history, one of the major incentives for soldiers was the availability of pussy.

Mostly through raping and pillaging of innocent civilians; or in the case of American soldiers -- mainly through the conversion of "downtown" civilian centers into giant sex gambling and drug palaces. (think Saigon or Tijuana with soldiers --or a lawless las Vegas).

Marine captain Irwin Mandelbaum, a thirty year veteran said;"You don't mind taking your chances on getting your brains blown out if your gonna get your dick blown out on your pass time!" He continued; "there is no pussy in Iraq for our boy's and it's affecting their performance! - weapon accuracy is down thirty to forty percent. -- did you ever try to fire a high powered weapon with a giant hard-on?"

He explained; "The Muslims don't allow sexual contact with their women unless it's behind closed doors with their children watching and screaming while they line up their wives and cornhole one after another with those burlap things draped over their greasy heads." -- "It's their religion and they take it quite seriously," said the Captain.

He went on; "The worst thing is that there's so many homo's in the ranks these days --both men and women --that the straight soldiers haven't got a chance; and it ain't like the good old days when you could just go down to the infirmary, if you couldn't get a pass, and date rape some fat ugly nurse."

He pleaded;"If you gals back home want to do something for the war effort -- stop sending my horny troopers candy bars and get your pussies over here and give my boy's some real candy -- hell! - I've seen boy's in the field after a night of pussy and they'll got out into the scariest situations and blow them sand niggers to smithereens!"

The bandit war correspondent said;"You know Captain Mandelbaum --you make a great spokesman for the Marines and the troops under your command --you should make a video and put it on You Tube and I'll bet you'll have women calling the state department and volunteering to relieve your soldiers."

"Great idea son! -- and i'll personally guarantee that these little ladies won't be goin home to their soft civilians so fast --when they get the high hard one up the chute from a Marine!"

One last question Captain;"How do you solve your personal pussy dilemma? He replied; "Don't ask -- don't tell!"